Discussion What advice would you give to a suicidal person?

[BloomingStrella]

Say someone you cared about was thinking of killing themselves, and they've informed you of their plans. What would you say to try and disincentivize them from CTB'ing? How would you attempt to convince them to try and better themselves? To convince them that life is worth living?

 

[Sulyya]

Depends why they want to, I guess. I don't know how helpful I've ever really been but I try to give the perspective that good things, whatever they are or however short they last, are worth so much bad. Not everyone will agree or be able to share that perspective.

 

[ThrowedAway]

I would most likely try to point them away for it, i love all my friends and would probably make them do some stuff that would hopefully change their life perspective.

 

[Huntfish34]

All depends on the person and situation I suppose? .... With a couple of the people I basically just talked / cried with them and said I respect their decision, even though I really did not want them to die. They respected it and thankfully they are still around today.

With 2 others I had a different approach for w/e reason ... called 911 on a good friend that sent me a goodbye text. Not sure if she is even alive today, sadly lost contact with her a couple years ago.

Idk, every situation is different.

 

[Source Energy]

All depends on the person and situation I suppose? .... With a couple of the people I basically just talked / cried with them and said I respect their decision, even though I really did not want them to die. They respected it and thankfully they are still around today.

With 2 others I had a different approach for w/e reason ... called 911 on a good friend that sent me a goodbye text. Not sure if she is even alive today, sadly lost contact with her a couple years ago.

Idk, every situation is different.

Did you lose contact with her because you called 911 on her? Why did you do such a thing?

 

[BloomingStrella]

All depends on the person and situation I suppose? .... With a couple of the people I basically just talked / cried with them and said I respect their decision, even though I really did not want them to die. They respected it and thankfully they are still around today.

With 2 others I had a different approach for w/e reason ... called 911 on a good friend that sent me a goodbye text. Not sure if she is even alive today, sadly lost contact with her a couple years ago.

Idk, every situation is different.

This is more or less the approach I take when dealing with a suicidal loved one. However, they consider me respecting their decision to be encouraging their suicide, and they vocally chastise me for it. It leaves me very confused, like, aren't you the one seeking comfort from me? Anyway, I think suicide is a very personal decision, so I've never ruled it out as an option to life's problems - probably why I'm not very good when it comes to this type of stuff. I certainly don't want them to die, though, so I always try my best. Thanks for your response.

 

[Huntfish34]

Thank you, most appreciated. It's All a very difficult road to go down when the tables are turned on you.

SourceEnergy. - Wow okay...... Nope, she was mad at me for about 2 days and then let it go after saying I did the right thing. I Really didn't like or enjoy doing that. , which she was well aware of. Why did I do such a thing ? Idk ? Maybe because I deeply care and love her .. Sorry. -

 

[guayabas]

This is more or less the approach I take when dealing with a suicidal loved one. However, they consider me respecting their decision to be encouraging their suicide, and they vocally chastise me for it. It leaves me very confused, like, aren't you the one seeking comfort from me? Anyway, I think suicide is a very personal decision, so I've never ruled it out as an option to life's problems - probably why I'm not very good when it comes to this type of stuff. I certainly don't want them to die, though, so I always try my best. Thanks for your response.

they might benefit from being told how much you care about them and how it would effect you if they died. Not in a guilt trippy way, but one thing that makes me feel more suicidal is feeling like no one in my life cares that I'm suicidal. that might be what it feels like for them when you talk about supporting them.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

It's too situation-dependent to give a general answer.

 

[Valky]

That life is worth living. I know how cruel and unfair life can be but I promise that it is not always gonna stay like that. It may seem like nothing will change and you will be stuck in this deep hole forever but I promise you that that is not the truth. Life can be beautiful, full of hope and happiness, for everyone. We just need to find the right path for our own happiness and I am certain that we will.

 

[ireallylikemangoes]

I wouldn't know what i would say, as all the advice that is given to me goes in one ear and out the other, and I do not want to give superficial advice like that.

I'd probably just be a listener, i would listen to their problems and try to be supportive. I believe my sympathy will do some of the work for me.

 

[Paradise]

If you have a suicide date, you can afford to push it back a week or two. If nothing makes you want to live (/make you happy/give you hope) even for a moment, you can go cbt. You can always die, you can't always live.

 

[itsallpointless]

I don't think these might be the best words per se, but I'd say something along the lines of "You know deep down inside that life could be beautiful." - Which is probably true, but something suicidal people would go into denial about or reject.
I don't really think that orally there's much you could say that would help anyway. After all, actions speak louder than words, so it's better to speak through action.

 

[peaches]

As most of you said, it completely depends on the person and the nature of your relationship.
I would let them lead me into any area that they wanted to talk about.
Ctb is a decision that cannot be undone. We can only decide that for ourselves. It's easier for me to look at others and think that they may have a shot at learning to want to be here. But I can't do it for myself.
I also think that some people just want the pain and suffering to stop and we don't have another way to end this despair. It's less about dying and more about needing relief.

 

[charlotte_]

It depends on whether the person wants to be helped or not. If they don't, then I don't think there's any point in trying to convince them, since they don't even bother expecting anymore. If they do, then I'll try to make them think about what they love in life. Like, if they love cats, I'd ask them if they want to live longer to rescue stray cats and become a guardian to them. Another way I think could work is to make them see the solution in their own problems. For example, if they want to commit suicide out of the pain grieving over the death of someone they love, I'd ask them: "Would (the person) want you to live a happy life if they're still here?" (assuming that person is a good person). I won't be their hero or their problem solver, because at the end of the day people change for no one. They just change for the influence of someone. So it's best if you let them find their own solutions

 

[SexyIncél]

Identify their root problems and see how solvable they are. If unsolvable, I consider whether I'll join them. If I won't, I'll try to amuse and care for them before they depart