We’re any of you spanked growing up?

[Journeytoletgo]

Isn't that a form of abuse?

 

[its-about-time]

Bare bottom with a flat stick of rubber. Then would make me sit on his lap and hug him afterwards so he could tell me he loved me. Weird shit.

 

[Journeytoletgo]

Bare bottom with a flat stick of rubber. Then would make me sit on his lap and hug him afterwards so he could tell me he loved me. Weird shit.

Spanking can cause emotional dis regulations don't you think?

 

[its-about-time]

Spanking can cause emotional dis regulations don't you think?

I think a lot of things from childhood fucked me up but I definitely got some weird "I have to hurt you because i love you" messages and could explain why I became such a violent sexual & emotional masochist rather early on

 

[Journeytoletgo]

I think a lot of things from childhood fucked me up but I definitely got some weird "I have to hurt you because i love you" messages and could explain why I became such a violent sexual & emotional masochist rather early on

Everything begins in childhood, it makes so much sense now

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Seems to be a very bad idea

 

[Journeytoletgo]

Seems to be a very bad idea

Yes it is very bad and dysfunctional

 

[sharky]

Not spanked but beaten up and choked. Parents often do shit that fuck up their children, but I always wonder if they are aware of that. Because sometimes that's lifelong trauma and therapy.

 

[Rational man]

I was beaten physically by my Mother and Brother, like kicked and objects thrown at me. My parents were divorced. I was never spanked. Either way, its abuse.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I was, a lot, and all by my dad. Usually for getting any grades below a 90% in any exam or homework assignment since that was the only form of misbehavior I couldn't control due to being really stupid. At some point, spanking with a hand wasn't enough and my dad had to resort to using things like rulers and other tools. The worst one was the riding crop meant for horses. It had a hand at the tip and it really really hurt. It looked something like this:


I'm of the opinion that spanking is a really good way to make children fear getting caught doing anything bad but beyond that it can't fundamentally change who they are. If they were always going to be little idiots like me then no amount of physical abuse will change that.

The punishment that got me saved out of my dad's household wasn't a spanking though, more of a beating.

 

[Rational man]

Not spanked but beaten up and choked. Parents often do shit that fuck up their children, but I always wonder if they are aware of that. Because sometimes that's lifelong trauma and therapy.

if they didn't know the fallout from abusing kids, then they shouldn't have been parents. My narcissistic Mother beat me and told me on numerous occasions that my Father didnt really want me. Parents like that should be thrown in jail for abuse. ABUSE manifests in many forms and abused children often only realise in adulthood that they were victims of abuse, often told by parents that this is NORMAL behaviour. Kids can be scarred for life often unable to find love within.

 

[Nightmare Painting]

I think I was spanked only a few times but then again I can't remember most of my childhood. Children are all different but some are more easily traumatized than others; being intentionally hurt by someone that's suppose to love you unconditionally is a form of abuse and completely soul crushing to a child. From what little I remember my parents were either indifferent to me or my mom would threaten me or shout all kinds of profanities at me; physical violence was mostly nonexistent from what little I remember. Any form of abuse or neglect can fuck up a child for a lifetime.

 

[Hollowman]

Yep my clueless parents spanked me a lot it never did any good. I'd probably have a better relationship with them had they not.

 

[watchingthewheels]

Yup. And I turned out fine.

Wait...

 

[Zebedee]

My dad used to discipline me, my siblings and my mother with a clenched fist quite often... I had a very dysfunctional childhood and can't help but feel like it has followed me into adulthood ... I know people have had it far, far worse than me, but nonetheless, my parents never hugged me or told me they loved me.

 

[sharky]

if they didn't know the fallout from abusing kids, then they shouldn't have been parents. My narcissistic Mother beat me and told me on numerous occasions that my Father didnt really want me. Parents like that should be thrown in jail for abuse. ABUSE manifests in many forms and abused children often only realise in adulthood that they were victims of abuse, often told by parents that this is NORMAL behaviour. Kids can be scarred for life often unable to find love within.

Exactly this. I only realized it when i was an adult and then even blamed myself for it. I thought that i deserved it because I was bad or something. Also my father told me it was my fault that my mother died. Fucked me up good
If I had children I would never do that, I don't know how people that beat their kids can sleep at night and live with themselves

 

[Rational man]

Exactly this. I only realized it when i was an adult and then even blamed myself for it. I thought that i deserved it because I was bad or something. Also my father told me it was my fault that my mother died. Fucked me up good
If I had children I would never do that, I don't know how people that beat their kids can sleep at night and live with themselves

Narcissistic parents are often angry, deeply disatisfied with their relationships and deflect their pain on the indefensible like kids or maybe pets. when i look at the family history i realise that dysfunctional traits stem backwards. My grandad gassed himself and my Father attempted suicide because of their pain. Iironically, my plan to ctb is because of physical illness, brought on by the corona vax

 

[Fragile]

No, I'm latino. This is the weapon of our moms:


To be hones, It never affected me since us latinos meme a lot about it, it's very common to have been a victim of the chancla and never care much about it.

 

[sharky]

Narcissistic parents are often angry, deeply disatisfied with their relationships and deflect their pain on the indefensible like kids or maybe pets. when i look at the family history i realise that dysfunctional traits stem backwards. My grandad gassed himself and my Father attempted suicide because of their pain. Iironically, my plan to ctb is because of physical illness, brought on by the corona vax

Wait, what? Corona vax? I thought it was safe?

 

[watchingthewheels]

No, I'm latino. This is the weapon of our moms:
View attachment 89163

To be hones, It never affected me since us latinos meme a lot about it, it's very common to have been a victim of the chancla and never care much about it

A Puerto Rican former co-worker of mine use to joke about his "abuela" and "la chancla". I could relate; while my own mom preferred the "wooden spoon", (if we were lucky), my own grandmother was known to come at her kids with a sandal (if they were lucky).
I can laugh about it...now...
Anyway, he used to love sharing this video...

 

[Tristan]

My mum used to beat me since early age to eat soup and raw vegetables, result. I cant stand any of those since I became a teen until now.

 

[Rational man]

Wait, what? Corona vax? I thought it was safe?

Sure for most but i got unlucky and it set off autoimmune disease . Im incurable!

 

[sharky]

Sure for most but i got unlucky and it set off autoimmune disease . Im incurable!

Damn that sucks. I'd rather have Corona 10 times instead of autoimmune disease. I'm sorry

 

[FogFilledLife]

Not by my relatives.

 

[Tarantula Girl]

I got spanked until i turned into a teenager. And the spanks were always with a canoe oar(paddle). So painful and can still remember exactly how it felt now and im now 33. And i mainly got spanked because i skin pick and my dad apparently thought beating me would make that compulsive disorder go away.

 

[GentleJerk]

@watchingthewheels ah the ol' wooden spoon. Same. I can't remember if I ever actually got hit with it, just the threat was enough... I was pretty well behaved, at least for my family and friends at home.

But when my stepdad came along he would dish out some pretty harsh treatment sometimes. Once he told me if I don't like it, pack my bags and fucc off. So I did! Well, I tried to. I got about 20 minutes down the road when he came flying around the corner, and threw me into his car.

He spent about 45 minutes yelling, slapping me around, and jabbing his humongous sausage finger into my chest while driving laps around the neighborhood. Then he would cry and apologize, saying he got upset because he was so worried about me ffs I told my friend at school and he keyed my stepdad's car. That only made things worse!

 

[Blondi]

Never , my parents aren't total imbeciles.

 

[ArcherFiles44]

Bare bottom with a flat stick of rubber. Then would make me sit on his lap and hug him afterwards so he could tell me he loved me. Weird shit.

Weird

 

[Sister of the Moon]

I wouldn't exactly call it spanking. That implies that I'd been naughty and taken a slap to the bottom for discipline.

No, it was more like being dragged around by the hair, punched, hit repeatedly etc.

I wasn't a naughty child at all. My crimes? Aged seven, staying after school to attend the chess club, and my mother forgot. So I got thrown onto the sofa and hit repeatedly. Aged eight, getting sent out in the freezing cold snow on Boxing Day to go and buy cigarettes (yes it used to be allowed) and sweets for my parents. I had no gloves on and it was blowing a blizzard. My hands were blue with cold. It was also dark. I walked in with tears streaming down and held up my blue hands and my mother repeatedly hit me around the face and body. Aged fourteen, answering my dad back because I was sick of his emotional abuse, and he dragged me by the hair, threw me down onto the bottom of my brother's bed and I hit my mouth on the footboard.

I've been bitter towards my parents for years for how useless I turned out to be due to their abuse. My dad is dead and my mother is now a recluse with severe anxiety and depression. I'm sure a big part of hers must be the guilt she carries for how my sister and I turned out. We're not bad people, just useless because we've seen, heard and gone through things no child should ever have to.

Yet on another level I forgive them. I can't condone it but all people are flawed, and none of us can turn the clock back.

 

[rationaltake]

Extreme violence that left me unable to move for hours.

Hair ripped out of my head.

And corporal punishment was allowed in schools then. Aged 7 we had to sit with our hands out on the desk so the teacher could hit them with a ruler if we got anything wrong.

I preferred school.

Aged eight, getting sent out in the freezing cold snow on Boxing Day to go and buy cigarettes (yes it used to be allowed) and sweets for my parents. I had no gloves on and it was blowing a blizzard. My hands were blue with cold. It was also dark. I walked in with tears streaming down and held up my blue hands and my mother repeatedly hit me around the face and body.

Yes. A similar thing happened to me when I was seven. I was sent out in the snow with a can which was half my size to get paraffin from the garage for the only heater.

I used my father's filthy dirty and holey old socks on my hands as I had no gloves.