Waking thoughts

[Forever broken]

Does anyone else have suicidal rights immediately upon waking? For a long time, I've had these thoughts occasionally but for the last 6 months, I have them every morning. I tell myself that today is the day. I'll finally end the pain. I think "pop! It's done!" At first it worried me but now I'm resigned to the idea that one day, I am going to do it. I'm only waiting on my dogs. One is 15 with dementia amb the other is 12 and diabetic. I don't want to leave them without someone who will care for them properly. After they pass, there won't be any reason to stay. Anyway, thanks for listening.

 

[Sea Turtle]

Waking up is definitely one of the worst parts of my day, I relate to this a lot. I have also resigned myself to knowing my death will inevitably be by my own hand.
Wish you peace

 

[FuneralCry]

Yes, I hate waking up, it is very dreadful, to realise that I have not passed away in my sleep each morning. As soon as I wake, I instantly think of wanting to leave this world, it is always on my mind. I have never wanted to be alive and I never will. My life is just meaningless suffering. I wish you the best.

 

[GreenTree]

Yes. Its horrible waking up. The realisation that everything ahead in the day is the same as the previous day. Pure torture.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I agree with everyone. Mornings are the worst times of the day. And even worse is when you woke up and it's like 4 in the morning and you can't sleep anymore. I can say that I share your love for animals. I can't leave my cat either, who turns 15 in May. I feel that she is the only one I owe anything to.

 

[Forever broken]

I agree with everyone. Mornings are the worst times of the day. And even worse is when you woke up and it's like 4 in the morning and you can't sleep anymore. I can say that I share your love for animals. I can't leave my cat either, who turns 15 in May. I feel that she is the only one I owe anything to.

I hate mornings. I usually wake up between 230-300 am. I seldom sleep more then 5 or 6 hours. It's wearing on my soul

 

[Umbrella Weather]

I have enormous trouble sleeping, as I imagine we all do. My problem is that I awake four, five, six times a night in fear and loathing—every night—and the horror of awaking just compounds... When daytime arrives I simply can't believe that we must start all of this over again.

 

[Otto]

I don't mind mornings ,but I seldom sleep until my body can't cope with being awake any longer.
There is the smallest time when I wake up and just for that moment it doesn't hurt so much
Then as the day turns into another night it all intensifies.
It's like life you start off unaware of how you don't fit and as it progresses it all hits you and the nightmares come but not just when your asleep .
I know I am not describing this very well but Im so tired
I don't know if I should post this, delete it or start again
The best option is to just delete myself

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I hate mornings. I usually wake up between 230-300 am. I seldom sleep more then 5 or 6 hours. It's wearing on my soul

I understand :( I just felt a sleep but now I had nightmares and woke up. It's about midnight here.

I have enormous trouble sleeping, as I imagine we all do. My problem is that I awake four, five, six times a night in fear and loathing—every night—and the horror of awaking just compounds... When daytime arrives I simply can't believe that we must start all of this over again.

Same here.

 

[tieiwi]

I do actually. I thought that falling asleep would be harder since my mind can never calm down just before I'm about to fall asleep. But waking up is a whole different feeling. Or more like not feeling anything at all. It's like a "this life is pointless" type of feeling. Then I just lay there dreading everything.

 

[Forever Dead]

I suffer from insomnia due to anxiety, but when I. finally do. go to sleep, I do so hoping that I never wake up again. And when I do wake up, I often feel relitavely ok for a very short moment followed by an instant sense of dread and panic, and my response is always "Oh for fucks sake, not this again ".

 

[KimKevorkian]

Yes, I hate waking up, it is very dreadful, to realise that I have not passed away in my sleep each morning. As soon as I wake, I instantly think of wanting to leave this world, it is always on my mind. I have never wanted to be alive and I never will. My life is just meaningless suffering. I wish you the best.

The final two sentences would be a great title for a book.