time2gosoon
New Member
- Jul 12, 2026
- 2
Greetings.
I have DID so we interchangeably use I/we.
For the past 10 years we have been trying to find mental health support.
In that time, I've lost:
Family - Afraid of me for being suicidal
Spouse - The one who suggested therapy
Job - Combination of anxiety/depression/wife who always wanted more
Friends - Everyone sided with spouse
Sanity - Not sure we ever had this in excess
In the beginning we were hopeful because Spouse was a counselor and I thought we had a good support network of friends. But we didn't even know about the DID until years later and it turns out we've been "playing" different characters our entire life. So once that character "dies" so does the supporting cast. We're currently on version 4 once we started keeping track, potentially dozens of characters came before.
Every medication we have tried gives us hallucinations. When the doctors hear the medication isn't effective they immediately jump to hospitalization. The crisis line's default answer is also "commit yourself to a hospital". We've already been hospitalized against our will a few times. The hospitals don't want to help, they want it marked on paper that they imprisoned me for the "standard amount of time". Even if you tell them you're going to make another attempt during discharge, they'll release you. They don't give a fuck, they only care about appearances.
I am convinced that there are no mental health "professionals" in my State, perhaps Country.
The "resources" don't work. They're just a funnel that empties into "hospitalization". Beginning in 2019 I made several attempts. It's been 2y,1m since my last attempt.
My situation was "bearable" for a while once we started going to dog parks and began training dogs. These people approached me about training and at first I didn't charge any money. The dogs are like therapy for me and it was a huge moral boost to hear other people tell me how good of a trainer I am. But now I can't even look forward to visiting my clients. Because, outside of everything, I know it will eventually be done and over. Sometimes I get anxious about the people but their dog(s) always turn it around.
I don't feel like I'm compatible with humans, but we fit in well with dogs. If only I could live in a kennel.
I have DID so we interchangeably use I/we.
For the past 10 years we have been trying to find mental health support.
In that time, I've lost:
Family - Afraid of me for being suicidal
Spouse - The one who suggested therapy
Job - Combination of anxiety/depression/wife who always wanted more
Friends - Everyone sided with spouse
Sanity - Not sure we ever had this in excess
In the beginning we were hopeful because Spouse was a counselor and I thought we had a good support network of friends. But we didn't even know about the DID until years later and it turns out we've been "playing" different characters our entire life. So once that character "dies" so does the supporting cast. We're currently on version 4 once we started keeping track, potentially dozens of characters came before.
Every medication we have tried gives us hallucinations. When the doctors hear the medication isn't effective they immediately jump to hospitalization. The crisis line's default answer is also "commit yourself to a hospital". We've already been hospitalized against our will a few times. The hospitals don't want to help, they want it marked on paper that they imprisoned me for the "standard amount of time". Even if you tell them you're going to make another attempt during discharge, they'll release you. They don't give a fuck, they only care about appearances.
I am convinced that there are no mental health "professionals" in my State, perhaps Country.
The "resources" don't work. They're just a funnel that empties into "hospitalization". Beginning in 2019 I made several attempts. It's been 2y,1m since my last attempt.
My situation was "bearable" for a while once we started going to dog parks and began training dogs. These people approached me about training and at first I didn't charge any money. The dogs are like therapy for me and it was a huge moral boost to hear other people tell me how good of a trainer I am. But now I can't even look forward to visiting my clients. Because, outside of everything, I know it will eventually be done and over. Sometimes I get anxious about the people but their dog(s) always turn it around.
I don't feel like I'm compatible with humans, but we fit in well with dogs. If only I could live in a kennel.
