FoxSauce
Emotionally unstable like an IKEA table
- Aug 23, 2024
- 1,351
I need to let it out cant hold these anymore I feel like im about to explode.
To start nothing happened per sé (dont know if im writting it correctly) but every little setback and situation makes me go insane.
Going to work i work in a food establishment mostly whos talking behind my back (moslty customers) ik is a very dumb thing to think about but you dont know who's planning your downfall (sorry if its sounds paranoid) im worried my next shift is my last. EVERY. SINGLE.TIME.
My boss isnt bad, some coworkers are ok but im just worried I might do the slightest setback and BAM! fired and ik it may seem dramatic makes me wanna cbt from all the stress.
Plus my depressive episode working ofc it wont. All I want is to die ans rot and just be at peace.
Again it might be stupid to some. I dont know how much I can keep silent and just smile. Idk who's having good intentions and who isnt. Everytime I make a mistake I feel like ending myself right then and there.
Ik I should work hard and all that ans not letting affect me as much as it does but it does.
Work, my mental health, responsibilities it just too much.
I just cant hurt my family if I go I just cant hurt them. I feel so alone on this, the thought of getting fired rattles my core and my SI is increasing, I cant afford to be fired, my family depends on me.
Idk if I need to let out a good cry or what.
Impulsively I just wanna quit but the consequences after wont solve anything.
I just dont know of what to do.
Sorry for this long rant
Ps. I guess I should add I'll work on some dbt skills
To start nothing happened per sé (dont know if im writting it correctly) but every little setback and situation makes me go insane.
Going to work i work in a food establishment mostly whos talking behind my back (moslty customers) ik is a very dumb thing to think about but you dont know who's planning your downfall (sorry if its sounds paranoid) im worried my next shift is my last. EVERY. SINGLE.TIME.
My boss isnt bad, some coworkers are ok but im just worried I might do the slightest setback and BAM! fired and ik it may seem dramatic makes me wanna cbt from all the stress.
Plus my depressive episode working ofc it wont. All I want is to die ans rot and just be at peace.
Again it might be stupid to some. I dont know how much I can keep silent and just smile. Idk who's having good intentions and who isnt. Everytime I make a mistake I feel like ending myself right then and there.
Ik I should work hard and all that ans not letting affect me as much as it does but it does.
Work, my mental health, responsibilities it just too much.
I just cant hurt my family if I go I just cant hurt them. I feel so alone on this, the thought of getting fired rattles my core and my SI is increasing, I cant afford to be fired, my family depends on me.
Idk if I need to let out a good cry or what.
Impulsively I just wanna quit but the consequences after wont solve anything.
I just dont know of what to do.
Sorry for this long rant
Ps. I guess I should add I'll work on some dbt skills
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