Venting Upsetting Post-Pregnancy Information That I Just Discovered [TW]

[lionetta12]

Hi all,

Still trying to recover, still not sure how to, but I am trying everything that I can think of that I haven't already tried. Trying to live as normal of a life as possible in the meanwhile which still includes trying to use social medias again and to try and talk to my old friends again and just "be myself".

Got suggested my exe's sister to follow on Instagram just some minutes ago and accidently clicked on their profile when I was trying to click the x button, got a new phone with a big screen some days ago and still trying to get used to it. Saw in the biography that they had something about their child having autism. It kind of upset me and hit me hard because I asked when I got pregnant if his family had any illnesses, history of autism, bipolar disorders, etc, that he was aware of, because I know my family does not and I was reading into my own family medical history which was alright. He refused to give me any real answers to the question. It made me a little wary and scared that he wouldn't answer that. It makes me upset to accidently now discover this since he made me pregnant and wanted me to be a single mom when he knew that there was a chance that I could've had a higher than average risk of birthing a child with a disability or an illness, without informing me of that, and while also expecting me to take care of that child all by myself while he would not be a part of raising it. I just don't get why someone would do something like this to me, I don't understand what the purpose was. I feel hurt and violated. I had explained many times before I got pregnant that I don't think I could raise a disabled or challenged child on my own or at all because I know that I'm not capable of that. Just wish that I wasn't lied to and that I could know and understand why he did this to me.

Just trying to get over the situation, but it's hard to because I have zero answers to why this happened to me amongst other things that they did to me.

 

[EternalShore]

I'm still very sorry that he has abandoned you like that~ :/ some guys are just soooo scummy and evil~ >_< It's a little late now, but I hope you learned your lesson about trusting guys, particularly without establishing a marital commitment~ >_< I know a few resources, but they're only within my state as far as I'm aware~ Regardless, if you need assistance as I assume you will, since you're about to be a single mom, and I get how difficult and unfortunate that is, I know a lot of churches offer stuff for babies and kids, even if it just helps out a little~

 

[The Morningstar]

I'm sorry to hear of your situation. It sounds like you had been deceived by this guy, likely more than once.
Being a single parent can be a challenge by itself, and children with special needs can take additional effort and resources to raise. But raised by you, I am sure they will become a loving and thoughtful person.

Are you looking for a way to decrease your apprehension about having this child, by any chance?

 

[lionetta12]

Hi all,

Still trying to recover, still not sure how to, but I am trying everything that I can think of that I haven't already tried. Trying to live as normal of a life as possible in the meanwhile which still includes trying to use social medias again and to try and talk to my old friends again and just "be myself".

Got suggested my exe's sister to follow on Instagram just some minutes ago and accidently clicked on their profile when I was trying to click the x button, got a new phone with a big screen some days ago and still trying to get used to it. Saw in the biography that they had something about their child having autism. It kind of upset me and hit me hard because I asked when I got pregnant if his family had any illnesses, history of autism, bipolar disorders, etc, that he was aware of, because I know my family does not and I was reading into my own family medical history which was alright. He refused to give me any real answers to the question. It made me a little wary and scared that he wouldn't answer that. It makes me upset to accidently now discover this since he made me pregnant and wanted me to be a single mom when he knew that there was a chance that I could've had a higher than average risk of birthing a child with a disability or an illness, without informing me of that, and while also expecting me to take care of that child all by myself while he would not be a part of raising it. I just don't get why someone would do something like this to me, I don't understand what the purpose was. I feel hurt and violated. I had explained many times before I got pregnant that I don't think I could raise a disabled or challenged child on my own or at all because I know that I'm not capable of that. Just wish that I wasn't lied to and that I could know and understand why he did this to me.

Just trying to get over the situation, but it's hard to because I have zero answers to why this happened to me amongst other things that they did to me.

I can update this story now. He sexually assaulted me a couple weeks ago after spending several days trying to convince me to show up to his house and to be in a exclusive and monogamous relation with him again. After the assault in his bedroom, he told me to leave and that he didn't want to be with me anymore even though we had just only been togheter exclusively for barely a day which is what he wanted and that he changed his mind, I asked what do I do now and what was the point of all of this? I asked if he did this to infect me with chlamydia again and if he did this to try and impregnate me again, I said what do I do now? Will I be a single mom now? He said I don't know, not my problem. Before the assault, I had told him in the bedroom that I saw that his sister had the autism symbol in her bio months prior and that I guess his nephew has autism? He denied that and laughed. I'd been celibate by choice since our last pregnancy. I'm now pregnant again from this assault, not infected because the cops took me to the emergency room and I got antibiotics treatment right away which unfortunately made my mini pill/birth control stop working which is probably why I'm pregnant now as a result. I don't know how long he planned to do this for, but he's probably been planning this since late May or maybe since I posted this post so who knows what he's been doing to prepare for this to increase the odds of making me pregnant and/or infected again on his end. He used our last pregnancy against me as a psychological weapon before I went to the police and said that the fact that I wasn't able to keep the last babies was the reason why he didn't marry me or live with me and made fun of the twins we lost. He also threatened to suicide if I went to the police and called me disgusting amongst many other insults and threats. I did record everything because I was uncomfortable and my intuition before the assault wasn't feeling right, I was thinking that maybe it was just my C-PTSD, but I guess it was right and that's why I was so hesistant to show up in the first place and why I stalled for several days.

 

[Someplace_nice]

I can update this story now. He sexually assaulted me a couple weeks ago after spending several days trying to convince me to show up to his house and to be in a exclusive and monogamous relation with him again. After the assault in his bedroom, he told me to leave and that he didn't want to be with me anymore even though we had just only been togheter exclusively for barely a day which is what he wanted and that he changed his mind, I asked what do I do now and what was the point of all of this? I asked if he did this to infect me with chlamydia again and if he did this to try and impregnate me again, I said what do I do now? Will I be a single mom now? He said I don't know, not my problem. Before the assault, I had told him in the bedroom that I saw that his sister had the autism symbol in her bio months prior and that I guess his nephew has autism? He denied that and laughed. I'd been celibate by choice since our last pregnancy. I'm now pregnant again from this assault, not infected because the cops took me to the emergency room and I got antibiotics treatment right away which unfortunately made my mini pill/birth control stop working which is probably why I'm pregnant now as a result. I don't know how long he planned to do this for, but he's probably been planning this since late May or maybe since I posted this post so who knows what he's been doing to prepare for this to increase the odds of making me pregnant and/or infected again on his end. He used our last pregnancy against me as a psychological weapon before I went to the police and said that the fact that I wasn't able to keep the last babies was the reason why he didn't marry me or live with me and made fun of the twins we lost. He also threatened to suicide if I went to the police and called me disgusting amongst many other insults and threats. I did record everything because I was uncomfortable and my intuition before the assault wasn't feeling right, I was thinking that maybe it was just my C-PTSD, but I guess it was right and that's why I was so hesistant to show up in the first place and why I stalled for several days.

Shit man, your whole situation is fucked I'm so sorry, I am proud that you are staying as strong as you are. If you ever need someone to talk to you could always pm me. I have no experience with loss or pregnancy but I can always try to help and listen.

 

[lionetta12]

Shit man, your whole situation is fucked I'm so sorry, I am proud that you are staying as strong as you are. If you ever need someone to talk to you could always pm me. I have no experience with loss or pregnancy but I can always try to help and listen.

I tried to settle with him some days ago outside of court and to have all legal stuff dropped for the sake of this baby but he 'bit my hand' basically in a methaphorical sense and chose to refuse the offer just out of anger and spite towards me. I offered to save him and his future, but instead he's engaging in stuff to try and hurt me for some reason, which I'm just watching and I'm thinking well, I'm not sure why he's doing this because the only person he's hurting is himself and he's ruining his future currently, not mine. It's not making any logical sense.