Venting Upsetting day

[DrinkingInHell]

I found today to be incredibly difficult. Memories resurfacing and the fact that I truly hate myself coming to the forefront of my mind. I cried a lot, sobbing and pulling at my hair thinking about what has happened to me in the past. Trauma is a leech that is ever determined to stay attached to you. Even now I wipe tears off my face while writing. Something I often feel is that living is an arduous task. Everyday of my life seems similar to the last. I ask myself, what's the point? Why do I keep forcing myself to continue? I wonder what I will have planned in the future. I curse the names of those who hurt me so deeply in my childhood, ruined me, broke me into pieces that I haphazardly put together into who I am now
I have a therapy appointment tomorrow, hoping to swing by chick fla before to grab some of their morning menu. Wish me luck. Time to go watch some black mirror

 

[opheliaoveragain]

wishing you all the luck. and sending you a hug too. I really identify with how you described feeling about life. and trauma. (cptsd here). it truly is a leech, great way to put it truly.