Venting Ups and downs

[divinemistress87]

People are always saying how life is full of ups and downs . What are ups ? I dont feel I've experienced them I think I came out of the womb depressed to me life has always been just being in straight survival mode

 

[derpyderpins]

Well, unfortunately - and luckily - it's somewhat personal for everyone. This is unfortunate because you can't be told exactly what it is, but lucky because the possibilities are endless.

Being in survival mode, anxious, fearful, etc., are easy ways not to experience ups. That makes sense biologically, right? If the tiger is chasing you, you don't want to stop and smell the roses. I personally would say for you, before seeking "ups" you should try to find a "not down," some time when you can breath and not be worried, even if only for a few minutes.

 

[divinemistress87]

Well, unfortunately - and luckily - it's somewhat personal for everyone. This is unfortunate because you can't be told exactly what it is, but lucky because the possibilities are endless.

Being in survival mode, anxious, fearful, etc., are easy ways not to experience ups. That makes sense biologically, right? If the tiger is chasing you, you don't want to stop and smell the roses. I personally would say for you, before seeking "ups" you should try to find a "not down," some time when you can breath and not be worried, even if only for a few minutes.

Ive tried I think after severe trauma ones brain gets stuck in that mode to protect one from the "Tiger" chasing you

 

[derpyderpins]

Ive tried I think after severe trauma ones brain gets stuck in that mode to protect one from the "Tiger" chasing you

For sure. Trauma can be devastating. I hope that over time your suffering can lessen at least a little.

 

[Randy Savage]

For some people, there is no true "up". There's only brief periods of respite, and back to grief again in the morning. The best thing you can do if you want to experience the ups of life is to grow and move on from your downs and unabashedly be yourself. Maybe yourself isn't happy just yet, and that's okay, but if you don't be gentle with your thoughts about yourself and ready to change then you will never move forward in this aspect.
Derpyderpins said it better than I can: just find a "not down" and go from there.

 

[FuneralCry]

That statement just invalidates suffering, for me personally there is certainly nothing positive about this undesirable existence, existing has only ever caused me to suffer.

 

[Cinnamorolls]

I feel you. My therapist once asked me what my happiest memories are and literally nothing came to mind. Things have just always been terrible. I think some of us are truly cursed.

 

[divinemistress87]

I feel you. My therapist once asked me what my happiest memories are and literally nothing came to mind. Things have just always been terrible. I think some of us are truly cursed.

I think so to and we have tried so damn hard to make it better <3

 

[QueerMelancholy]

I think the "UPs" are whenever you're blissfully ignorant. Haha. The downs? God the downs can go farther down. Down, down, down. My baby shot me down.

Like the UP doesn't need to be some profound beautiful glorious thing it can just be a time when you feel less likely to walk out into oncoming traffic. Maybe my brain is just potato mash. Maybe the UP is gravy.

 

[avalon_]

I do get some ups but it feels like they are only there to torment me and remind me how good life can be before it all comes crashing down again.

 

[sos]

pretty much what everyone said in the posts above

ups are different for everyone. it has its own definition for everyone.

for those who experience downs most of the time, anything that is the complete opposite from a down could already be considered to be an up

eg feeling sad one moment but enjoying your favorite tv a moment later

that could already be considered an up moment

very small but ups and downs don't need to have a huge impact on moments / your life

 

[andreamysk]

The catch is that our body (the body of all living beings) has evolved (since life arose on this earth, 3 and a half billion years ago) to notice/perceive above all the state of malaise (a symptom that something is wrong, that something potentially lethal must be avoided) rather than the state of well-being. And a bayas encysted in the brains of all primates, to make up for a loss of x requires a gain of at least 2x. Life is a rigged game (and I believe that for all those who are here, some mechanisms - either due to accidents/traumas suffered, or due to genetics - are even more rigged)

 

[divinemistress87]

I think the "UPs" are whenever you're blissfully ignorant. Haha. The downs? God the downs can go farther down. Down, down, down. My baby shot me down.

Like the UP doesn't need to be some profound beautiful glorious thing it can just be a time when you feel less likely to walk out into oncoming traffic. Maybe my brain is just potato mash. Maybe the UP is gravy.

I

The catch is that our body (the body of all living beings) has evolved (since life arose on this earth, 3 and a half billion years ago) to notice/perceive above all the state of malaise (a symptom that something is wrong, that something potentially lethal must be avoided) rather than the state of well-being. And a bayas encysted in the brains of all primates, to make up for a loss of x requires a gain of at least 2x. Life is a rigged game (and I believe that for all those who are here, some mechanisms - either due to accidents/traumas suffered, or due to genetics - are even more rigged)

Well said! Thank you can't fight biology

 

[CHOSEVIOLENCE]

People are always saying how life is full of ups and downs . What are ups ? I don't feel I've experienced them I think I came out of the womb depressed to me life has always been just being in straight survival mode

I'm similar. I don't feel happy, but I don't feel unhappy either. It's something I've dealt with for most of my life and my ex-therapist thought I may have schizoid personality disorder.