Update: I failed

[Thelastanon24]

I'm more broken up than ever before. All I want to do is cry. My CO detector read 999, I got in my truck, I fell asleep for roughly 3hrs...and I barely even have a headache. I metabolize everything quickly — anesthesia, alcohol, medication — but as far as I know, carbon monoxide shouldn't be part of that equation.

I don't undertand what I did wrong but this was my greatest fear: failing. I don't want to be alive anymore, I don't want to stay here, but now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.

 

[Theon]

I'm so sorry.

 

[dandan]

Aaaaw man, I'm sorry
I find it hard to ship ,
and I'm not salesman,
but here in Mexico
There's nitrogen tanks , many bridges and I know where there is 1kg of sodium cyanide.
Sorry for your attempt Damm, I failed with nitrogen and exit bag, it sucked.

 

[not_a_robot]

My greatest fear too, I really want an opiate cocktail but I worry my weird body will metabolize it like it's nothing or maybe it'll just knock me out long enough to seriously maim me.

I'm gonna bright-side this; you survived the attempt uninjured, not maimed or brain dead like a failed hanging or jump. You can go again, it could have been much worse.

 

[Thorn]

I'm more broken up than ever before. All I want to do is cry. My CO detector read 999, I got in my truck, I fell asleep for roughly 3hrs...and I barely even have a headache. I metabolize everything quickly — anesthesia, alcohol, medication — but as far as I know, carbon monoxide shouldn't be part of that equation.

I don't undertand what I did wrong but this was my greatest fear: failing. I don't want to be alive anymore, I don't want to stay here, but now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.

Very strange. This usually happens only with the diesel engines.

 

[Soul]

I'm sorry you're feeling shattered now, but please be gentle with yourself. Drink lots of water and breathe a lot of fresh air and treat it as a learning experience. As the insightful @not_a_robot said, you got through it without damaging yourself, and you can research it all some more, figure out what needs changing and make good decisions going forward.

 

[RememberWhatUCameFor]

Delayed neuropathology after carbon monoxide poisoning is immune-mediated

The neuropathological sequelae of carbon monoxide (CO) poisoning cannot be explained by hypoxic stress alone. CO poisoning also causes adduct formation between myelin basic protein (MBP) and malonylaldehyde, a reactive product of lipid peroxidation, resulting in an immunological cascade. MBP...

www.pnas.org

 

[Ruffian]

Awww, I'm sorry. I know how bad it feels after failing. I'm sorry and I hope things get better for you.

 

[Jen0804]

 

[LMFAO FOCKERS]

I once almost had accidental CO poisoning. I was living in government housing with the oven on for heat overnight in the dead of winter. Of course I didnt know at the time but I woke up in the morning feeling sleepy, weak and barely able to move. I struggled with all my might to make it to the window and open it. One blast of oxygen and I felt like hercules. I probably wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my internal clock or maybe that was SI??

I think CO needs more time for some. I once knew a girl in school who was brain damaged by CO poisoning in a house fire as a child. I felt sorry for her. People laughed at her behind her back. She was like a mentally disabled child with little working mental comprehension in a big adult looking body.

For these reasons I'm cautious on CO poisoning.

You may want to find another method.

 

[Joannf]

I'm more broken up than ever before. All I want to do is cry. My CO detector read 999, I got in my truck, I fell asleep for roughly 3hrs...and I barely even have a headache. I metabolize everything quickly — anesthesia, alcohol, medication — but as far as I know, carbon monoxide shouldn't be part of that equation.

I don't undertand what I did wrong but this was my greatest fear: failing. I don't want to be alive anymore, I don't want to stay here, but now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.

Let me guess... CO dispersed too quickly, and maybe reached only 2000ppm or so, for too short a time. Maybe your coals (you did use charcoal?) were already too far gone when you brought them inside... no idea, that sort of thing. But you obviously did not reach they necessary concentration, for a long enough period of time - THAT is for sure. So let's find out why. You obviously didn't reach 1600 ppm for more than an hour - it's simple. Follow instructions, how can you expect to die from an underdose ? What did you use for CO generation, how did you insulate the car doors, with foil from top to bottom ? The dashboard ? In an average car, you would need abt 3 kgs of coals to achieve more than 4000 ppm CO, and make sure it stays inside for 20 minutes... if that had been the case, we wouldn't be wondering now... don't lose faith, it's just a technical problem of the 2 + 2 makes 4 sort. You'll get it right next time.

 

[dreamsofdestruction]

Man that sucks, hope there isn't any damage that will make your life more difficult in addition now.

But yeah that method always seemed to me like it would be barely enough and too hard to predict...

 

[Cheezmam]

I'm more broken up than ever before. All I want to do is cry. My CO detector read 999, I got in my truck, I fell asleep for roughly 3hrs...and I barely even have a headache. I metabolize everything quickly — anesthesia, alcohol, medication — but as far as I know, carbon monoxide shouldn't be part of that equation.

I don't undertand what I did wrong but this was my greatest fear: failing. I don't want to be alive anymore, I don't want to stay here, but now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.
[/QUOTE

How much charcoal did u use?

 

[Thelastanon24]

Let me guess... CO dispersed too quickly, and maybe reached only 2000ppm or so, for too short a time. Maybe your coals (you did use charcoal?) were already too far gone when you brought them inside... no idea, that sort of thing. But you obviously did not reach they necessary concentration, for a long enough period of time - THAT is for sure. So let's find out why. You obviously didn't reach 1600 ppm for more than an hour - it's simple. Follow instructions, how can you expect to die from an underdose ? What did you use for CO generation, how did you insulate the car doors, with foil from top to bottom ? The dashboard ? In an average car, you would need abt 3 kgs of coals to achieve more than 4000 ppm CO, and make sure it stays inside for 20 minutes... if that had been the case, we wouldn't be wondering now... don't lose faith, it's just a technical problem of the 2 + 2 makes 4 sort. You'll get it right next time.

View attachment 12780

I filled up the fire starter to the top and waited for it all to get grey. When I dumped it into the bucket it felt like a lot less than what I needed; I know a lot of it was ash and it was in the back of my head that I should've flipped the coals or something. Maybe the fire was too hot? Maybe I shouldve put the bottom layer in the bucket, covered it, and then added the top layer after it turned more? I clearly undersized but I was desperate and hoping for the best.

 

[Joannf]

I filled up the fire starter to the top and waited for it all to get grey. When I dumped it into the bucket it felt like a lot less than what I needed; I know a lot of it was ash and it was in the back of my head that I should've flipped the coals or something. Maybe the fire was too hot? Maybe I shouldve put the bottom layer in the bucket, covered it, and then added the top layer after it turned more? I clearly undersized but I was desperate and hoping for the best.

I've been saying that chimney starters are not ideal, and if you fill one to the top, you get what, 4 kilos ? Depends on the size. No, more like 3.5 is my guess.
But you should use 2 kgs max to get equally grey colas... the lower ones burn out while the upper ones are still catching fire... so you probably ended up with about 1.5 kgs ideal coals and that was likely just enough to set off your detector to 999, and give you a relaxed feeling, and put you to sleep like 30 mgs of Valium.
The fire 'too hot' is a good one ;)
But yeah - you know, think about it : ideally, you wouldn't want the coals stacked five high, you would want them all in a pan like steaks, all fired from below at the same time, and all grey at the same time, just outside, and then ... but you cannot do that with one chimney starter, you can do it with 2-3 or you can do it with 4-6 grill trays, the ones I photographed in my last post about a page up. Preparing the coals well is the essential part of the exercise...
Never hope for the best, always be paranoid of the worst ;))

 

[Cheezmam]

I have seen stories from the Far East where it looks like just one grill in a hotel room. Just trying to figure out the right amount.

 

[Joannf]

I have seen stories from the Far East where it looks like just one grill in a hotel room. Just trying to figure out the right amount.

500 g ideal grey coals per cubic meter.
So in the Far East it would be "what sort of grill in what sort of room."
Hotel rooms can be tiny in the Far East.

 

[Thelastanon24]

I've been saying that chimney starters are not ideal, and if you fill one to the top, you get what, 4 kilos ? Depends on the size. No, more like 3.5 is my guess.
But you should use 2 kgs max to get equally grey colas... the lower ones burn out while the upper ones are still catching fire... so you probably ended up with about 1.5 kgs ideal coals and that was likely just enough to set off your detector to 999, and give you a relaxed feeling, and put you to sleep like 30 mgs of Valium.
The fire 'too hot' is a good one ;)
But yeah - you know, think about it : ideally, you wouldn't want the coals stacked five high, you would want them all in a pan like steaks, all fired from below at the same time, and all grey at the same time, just outside, and then ... but you cannot do that with one chimney starter, you can do it with 2-3 or you can do it with 4-6 grill trays, the ones I photographed in my last post about a page up. Preparing the coals well is the essential part of the exercise...
Never hope for the best, always be paranoid of the worst ;))

The fire burning too hot was a legitimate concern, actually. I used a fire starter because the wind kept blowing out the newspaper and it burned for longer and harder than the paper would. I worried about it burning the lower coals to ash before it got to the top; looks like I might've been right.

I'll try the grill trays next time and I'll do it on a less desperate state of mind. Now my issue is location as I'll no longer be able to do it at home. I can drive out to the desert and use a small grill I guess...just hate the idea of being stranded out there if it doesn't work again.

 

[fisil]

This is the reason i prefer posion.

 

[Thelastanon24]

I once almost had accidental CO poisoning. I was living in government housing with the oven on for heat overnight in the dead of winter. Of course I didnt know at the time but I woke up in the morning feeling sleepy, weak and barely able to move. I struggled with all my might to make it to the window and open it. One blast of oxygen and I felt like hercules. I probably wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my internal clock or maybe that was SI??

I think CO needs more time for some. I once knew a girl in school who was brain damaged by CO poisoning in a house fire as a child. I felt sorry for her. People laughed at her behind her back. She was like a mentally disabled child with little working mental comprehension in a big adult looking body.

For these reasons I'm cautious on CO poisoning.

You may want to find another method.

CO seems like the best possible way, there's just some science behind it; one that I didn't master. Everything else seems too risky. I could use a gun but what if it the bullet doesn't penetrate? There's no building here high enough to jump from. I can't get my hands on pure helium. Everything in this method seems logical to me I'm just frustrated that I did it wrong.

 

[Thorn]

This is the reason i prefer posion.

Either this, or if there is no way, a hose from the exhaust is the most used method. Guns and jumping should be the last resort, as failing these are a nightmare. Devyn Holmes is a good example of what can happen after the point blank shot in the temple.

 

[Joannf]

The fire burning too hot was a legitimate concern, actually. I used a fire starter because the wind kept blowing out the newspaper and it burned for longer and harder than the paper would. I worried about it burning the lower coals to ash before it got to the top; looks like I might've been right.

I'll try the grill trays next time and I'll do it on a less desperate state of mind. Now my issue is location as I'll no longer be able to do it at home. I can drive out to the desert and use a small grill I guess...just hate the idea of being stranded out there if it doesn't work again.

I see... wind is one of the things not within the equation. I'll do a couple of photos tomorrow so you can decide if the tray method works for you... they will of course be even less wind resistant than the chimney starter, and a bit more complicated to use, but they will assure equal quality of the coals. Have you thought of using one of these car covers they sell, there's some that cover just the top of a car - windows and roof.In theory, it should be possible to go to an official camp site, do the tent and grill steaks routine for half a day, then apply the cover and get the coals inside at night, They will all think you're in the tent, sleeping, and you're not in the desert in a shtf scenario. Takes a bit of acting skills I guess ;)

 

[Thelastanon24]

Either this, or if there is no way, a hose from the exhaust is the most used method. Guns and jumping should be the last resort, as failing these are a nightmare. Devyn Holmes is a good example of what can happen after the point blank shot in the temple.

God, yeah. The idea of surviving a gunshot is the only reason I won't do it. My truck is too new to run a hose form the exhaust but that was my original choice. If I could figure out how to mess with the catalytic converter in order to produce high enough levels I would. On the other hand, I don't want to ruin my expensive truck if I figure it out and survive. *sigh*

 

[Thorn]

God, yeah. The idea of surviving a gunshot is the only reason I won't do it. My truck is too new to run a hose form the exhaust but that was my original choice. If I could figure out how to mess with the catalytic converter in order to produce high enough levels I would. On the other hand, I don't want to ruin my expensive truck if I figure it out and survive. *sigh*

The catalytic converter starts working after reaching about 600 degrees Fahrenheit. If you fire it up cold, the exhaust is as lethal as there was no converter. On idle, it would take some time to heat up. If you have the means to measure CO, you could test it and see what you get and for how long.

 

[Cairn]

I'm more broken up than ever before. All I want to do is cry. My CO detector read 999, I got in my truck, I fell asleep for roughly 3hrs...and I barely even have a headache. I metabolize everything quickly — anesthesia, alcohol, medication — but as far as I know, carbon monoxide shouldn't be part of that equation.

I don't undertand what I did wrong but this was my greatest fear: failing. I don't want to be alive anymore, I don't want to stay here, but now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.

I am so sorry. Do you want to talk ?

 

[fisil]

You can be happy that you don't have long brain damage or something else co is very dangerous

 

[Thelastanon24]

The catalytic converter starts working after reaching about 600 degrees Fahrenheit. If you fire it up cold, the exhaust is as lethal as there was no converter. On idle, it would take some time to heat up. If you have the means to measure CO, you could test it and see what you get and for how long.

I already have all the necessary components to test it so I can give it a try. Unfortunately, I feel like the model year is simply too new to not have failsafes. Otherwise I'm sure people would be using the old way all the time.

I am so sorry. Do you want to talk ?

As much as I want to talk...I don't know what to say anymore. I wish I had the resources to hire a hitman.

 

[Thorn]

I already have all the necessary components to test it so I can give it a try. Unfortunately, I feel like the model year is simply too new to not have failsafes. Otherwise I'm sure people would be using the old way all the time.

Converter on the exhaust manifold? This is the newest invention to get it up to a working temperature faster. At the same time, it is easily accessible, to disconnect it and to connect a hose directly to the exhaust.

 

[ScorpiusDragon]

I'm more broken up than ever before. All I want to do is cry. My CO detector read 999, I got in my truck, I fell asleep for roughly 3hrs...and I barely even have a headache. I metabolize everything quickly — anesthesia, alcohol, medication — but as far as I know, carbon monoxide shouldn't be part of that equation.

I don't undertand what I did wrong but this was my greatest fear: failing. I don't want to be alive anymore, I don't want to stay here, but now I'm stuck and I don't know what to do.

I feel like SN or N should work for you if you are certain you want to die

 

[Thelastanon24]

I feel like SN or N should work for you if you are certain you want to die

Eh, of the many methods I've looked into I only feel confident with CO. Nothing else "feels" right of that makes any sense.