smirks00ts
have you...ever done something that you regret?
- Jul 12, 2026
- 145
[ continuation of this thread ]
its been a few days and things keep getting worse for me. I still keep losing ppl, everything feels quieter, my stomach hurts too much from anxiety and every person who is nice to me I feel like is another trap for me to fall down. I am still dead set on death.
The helpful things are that I found a way higher place in the College of science where ny math classes are, and i also might steal my dad's gun, or one of them, as I cant steal the rest reliably, theres an abandoned electrical box place thing with doors and stuff and it's not closed properly. I might hide there and die or OD.
Everything feels hopeless and i turn 21 in December. It feels awful and my health has been getting worse bevause of it, and I think im better off dead, no one really cared for me either way, maybe the most is one of my friends worrying for me online or my brother asking why im more irritated than usual.
Either way, lets hope I can bother to do it tomorrow, or at least this week. In case youre from the previous thread. im seriously sorry if I am stubborn or anything. I am too drained to care at this point. please forgive me.
fun update...one of my closest friends from 2023 blocked me over this shit, I dont know how they found out or anything but they didnt even bother to say anything. so thats nice.
guess im locking that decision in.
its been a few days and things keep getting worse for me. I still keep losing ppl, everything feels quieter, my stomach hurts too much from anxiety and every person who is nice to me I feel like is another trap for me to fall down. I am still dead set on death.
The helpful things are that I found a way higher place in the College of science where ny math classes are, and i also might steal my dad's gun, or one of them, as I cant steal the rest reliably, theres an abandoned electrical box place thing with doors and stuff and it's not closed properly. I might hide there and die or OD.
Everything feels hopeless and i turn 21 in December. It feels awful and my health has been getting worse bevause of it, and I think im better off dead, no one really cared for me either way, maybe the most is one of my friends worrying for me online or my brother asking why im more irritated than usual.
Either way, lets hope I can bother to do it tomorrow, or at least this week. In case youre from the previous thread. im seriously sorry if I am stubborn or anything. I am too drained to care at this point. please forgive me.
fun update...one of my closest friends from 2023 blocked me over this shit, I dont know how they found out or anything but they didnt even bother to say anything. so thats nice.
guess im locking that decision in.
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peace and love to you, my friend
