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lacustra

lacustra

Student
Jul 3, 2024
175
It was what you call partial hanging. I don't have a thick enough rope yet, so I used two strands of a 4mm nylon rope. It was very painful, even if I wrapped a small towel around the noose part of the rope. There was much pressure inside my head and I didn't feel like I was going to lose consciousness even after a minute. Maybe I need a thicker rope. Anyhow, it shocked me. I thought I could just go ahead and hang myself. It seems I need more resolve and practice.

I don't really have access to any fancy methods like CO, SN, or helium. I can't go with brutal methods like slitting my wrists or jumping in front of a train. Hanging, drowning, or jumping from a high lmace are apparently my only options. Drowning was my original method, but it's also a very unpredictable method. And high places make me very nervous. But I guess, when the pressure reaches critical levels, I won't worry too much about such trivialities.

Living has always been hard for me. Now dying is hard too. But what alternative do I have? This is inevitable. I just want to minimize the suffering.

Maybe I'll have to start looking for a CO meter and a camping tent. It would have been simple enough if I lived alone. Having to keep everything a secret on top of all this pain is horrible. I don't want to be found out. I don't want to humiliate myself anymore. But I have to go through with this. It's my fate.
 
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debzzzz

debzzzz

Lady of the flowers
Jul 28, 2024
18
If you have a tent and have access to go to some far away woods could be a good idea, hope the best of luck and I hope you can have peace, you can search for some mega threads about hanging, there's really some good info!
 
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Dot

Dot

Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
3,351
Living has always been hard for me. Now dying is hard too. But what alternative do I have? This is inevitable. I just want to minimize the suffering.

Srry fr ur tramatc xpernce

Wht hve u trid alrdy if life = dffclt fr u
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,942
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time in life, and now even getting to death, too, if that's your desire. I hope you can figure out what will work for you either way you choose. Yeah, dying isn't that easy, that's for sure.
 
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CouldaHvBeenARock

CouldaHvBeenARock

Farewell, My Concubine
Nov 16, 2023
147
A resource for full suspension hope it helps
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,504
I personally really wish it's not so difficult to be permanently free from this existence, it's so cruel to me how people have to suffer and struggle so much in trying to be gone, I'm sorry you suffer, I wish suicide is straightforward and painless more than anything now. But anyway best wishes.
 
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lacustra

lacustra

Student
Jul 3, 2024
175
Srry fr ur tramatc xpernce

Wht hve u trid alrdy if life = dffclt fr u
I posted my story here 10 days ago
A resource for full suspension hope it helps
I read this completely. When I get my 12mm rope, I will go for full suspension. At least it will prevent me from backing out at the last moment.
 
D

dolemitedrums

Arcanist
Jun 12, 2024
449
Based on the sensations you described and the amount of time it sounds like you were probably compressing your jugular veins but not your carotid arteries. Not to encourage you to do more self hanging but people tend to go unconscious in less time and without so much of a sensation of pressure in their head if they find the "sweet spot" on their neck and hit the carotids. Seems to be easier for some people to find than others.
 
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