Venting trauma from mental health treatment

[willitpass]

i am so tired of mental health treatment. i have been in and out of treatment since i was 6 or 7. i have had talk therapy, too many medications to count, intensive outpatient programs such as CBT and DBT programs, been in acute psych wards, including a four month stay, had ECT, and been in a residential facility for 8 months. i feel like i've just been a guinea pig my entire life for all of these fucking treatments. the worst part is the trauma they have left me with. oh the fucking trauma. i have been restrained 5 times, 3 of which included being chemically sedated. i have been lied to by therapists, forced into hospitalizations and therapy sessions. verbally abused by nurses and hospital staff. called stupid, attention seeking, unwanted by my own family. kept away from my own family. not even allowed to call my dad after being restrained. the trauma is too much to cope with sometimes. sometimes when i'm upset i'll find myself thinking "i just wanna go home" even when i'm laying in my own bed, because for 8 months when i was in the residential that's all that i thought about every day. was wanting to go home. i still jump at loud noises because of all of the horrible things i experienced, like watching other patient lash out and throw desks across rooms, slit their wrists in front of everyone, be restrained and beg to be let go. i wish i could forget it all.

and to those of you who are pro lifers spying on this forum: if you want us to live, give us better options than this. don't say that everyone has hope and there is something that can help us. what more is there for me to try? medications and therapy obviously haven't done it, yoga and essential oils are definitely not cutting it. and i've given it PLENTY of time to get better. i'm an adult and i've been doing this since i was practically a toddler. what options can you give me? if you have one please tell me because if you're begging for me to live then give me a life worth living.

 

[Depressed Cat]

I'm sorry to hear of all the sufferings you've been through, including at the hands of psychiatric staff. Don't be surprised if your thread is considered as supposed "psychiatry bashing" by some on this forum.

If I may ask, what did they actually diagnose you with? Psychiatry is simply not able to help with some mental conditions and one is left with no option but to be a guinea pig for a branch of medicine that's an extreme laggard compared to others.

Yes, the anti-choice horde simply lack empathy and cannot understand others' sufferings. They are so obsessed with their religious & social indoctrination that they lose their ability to connect to, understand and put themselves in the shoes of a fellow human being. I hope lurking around this forum at least makes them less of a religiously/socially indoctrinated herd animal and more of a human being.

 

[Dot]

Hve snt u d.m w/ altrnatve treatmnt optn

 

[willitpass]

I'm sorry to hear of all the sufferings you've been through, including at the hands of psychiatric staff. Don't be surprised if your thread is considered as supposed "psychiatry bashing" by some on this forum.

If I may ask, what did they actually diagnose you with? Psychiatry is simply not able to help with some mental conditions and one is left with no option but to be a guinea pig for a branch of medicine that's an extreme laggard compared to others.

Yes, the anti-choice horde simply lack empathy and cannot understand others' sufferings. They are so obsessed with their religious & social indoctrination that they lose their ability to connect to, understand and put themselves in the shoes of a fellow human being. I hope lurking around this forum at least makes them less of a religiously/socially indoctrinated herd animal and more of a human being.

it is not meant to be psychiatry bashing so i hope it doesn't come off that way. i have had many positive experiences in therapy but unfortunately they have done nothing to fix my mental health issues as a whole. and i very much encourage people who have not tried therapy or medication, etc to try them because i know many people who have been helped by them. i just personally have been left with a lot of trauma from the unfortunate places i have ended up

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds very awful, I'm sorry you have had this experience, no one should have to suffer like that. I understand that it can be dreadful when you cannot take anymore of this life. I wish you the best.