Todays the day

[aukguy]

Im in my hotel and its early morning, cant sleep. I've been struggling with mental health for a number of years, and now time to end it all.

Things came to head in early January, since then been out of the family home due to personal stuff, debts. Miss my wife and children in a way I cant describe - I saw them last night for tea, watching my children and hearing about their normal lives cut right through me as I'm not with them to enjoy it.

Anyway, I have my rope and found a good place in my room to end it all. Going to wait until the rooms been cleaned later then I'll have a 24hr window in which to go through with it.

My time on this site has been short but struck by the kindness and non-judgemental sentiments shown. I know my family will be hurt, even my wife who doesnt want to me with me anymore. My children have a great family network, friends, god-parents etc. I know they will be fine.

 

[C_F]

If you choose to go through with it, I wish you the best and a peaceful transition

 

[FreeBIRD]

I'm sorry that those unfortunate events lead you to this. Hope your transition goes in peace. If you feel that it's not your time you can back out. Love and peace to you xx

 

[shallow]

Whatever you choose to do, we are here for you. Wishing you a save journey.

 

[Tasdevil]

hope you find the peace your looking for no matter what you decide.

 

[throwaway_2620]

I'm so sorry about your ongoing mental health issues, recent family breakdown and debts. Whether you decide to go through with your attempt or end up changing your mind, I'll respect and support your decision either way. Also, keep in mind I won't judge if your suicide attempt fails, neither will anyone else on here.
Sending peace and love.

 

[Hopeindeath!]

I'm sorry you feel this is your only way out. I wish you peace.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I hope you find love light and peace.....

 

[catfletcher]

I'm so sorry you feel this way. I also have children and sometimes feel that they would be better off without me, but most of the time I can see that my death would traumatise them more. They are my protective factor, I suppose. Is there any way you might reconsider? I hope you find peace, one way or another.

 

[Lostandfound7]

No ur not...I don't wanna hijack the thread but if ur not gonna really support, then u should stay silent..love u bro but I think u need to step away from the site for a few..

 

[aukguy]

Thanks for the wishes. I have no intention of harming my children, Ive always been a good Dad - just the past which I've done so much to hide away for years came back these last couple of years which led to bad decisions.

This is a way out for me only, and to give some closure to my family.

 

[TheSuicidalEccentric]

Thanks for the wishes. I have no intention of harming my children, Ive always been a good day - just the past which I've done so much to hide away for years came back these last couple of years which led to bad decisions.

This is a way out for me only, and to give some closure to my family.

No problem; it is good you are not harming them. Sorry if the advice sounded wrong at all (if it did?). And I am very sorry for your situation.

 

[TheSuicidalEccentric]

Stop feeding this fool **PLEASE**

The person I was giving advice to is NOT a fool. And I will stop feeding him advice, as it seems my advice is unpopular at this time

 

[Chronicillness]

I'm sorry that it has come to this. If only our default moods were bliss and tranquility. I hope your chains to this insufferable existence are broken without any painful interference. Good luck brother.

 

[Lostandfound7]

How am I a fool?


I am not a troll, though. And come on why stop conversing you are great to talk with and stuff ;(

Yeah but u need help that I can't give...sorry luv..

U infuriate me..n I don't like it..

 

[TheSuicidalEccentric]

Yeah but u need help that I can't give...sorry luv..

U infuriate me..n I don't like it..

What kind of help? And I will stop infuriating you I am sorry I am done infuriating you

 

[Whitewash11235814]

ARE YOU READY TO RUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMBLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?
I'm a bit too late.

 

[Lostandfound7]

What kind of help? And I will stop infuriating you I am sorry I am done infuriating you

Thanks for the wishes. I have no intention of harming my children, Ive always been a good Dad - just the past which I've done so much to hide away for years came back these last couple of years which led to bad decisions.

This is a way out for me only, and to give some closure to my family.

I'm so sorry my Love...

We will redirect this back to u..plz excuse the other poster..

 

[aukguy]

@Lostandfound7 thanks - no need to apologies, this is an online space so goes with the territory. its not going to effect my decisions, ive made up my mind just need to go through with it. i have some stuff to take care of and then i expect room to be cleaned by mid-late afternoon here in UK. I can then make final prep being going through with it i hope.

 

[Lostandfound7]

@Lostandfound7 thanks - no need to apologies, this is an online space so goes with the territory. its not going to effect my decisions, ive made up my mind just need to go through with it. i have some stuff to take care of and then i expect room to be cleaned by mid-late afternoon here in UK. I can then make final prep being going through with it i hope.

Ok..
R u absolutely sure ur ready to do this?

 

[TheSuicidalEccentric]

@Lostandfound7 thanks - no need to apologies, this is an online space so goes with the territory. its not going to effect my decisions, ive made up my mind just need to go through with it. i have some stuff to take care of and then i expect room to be cleaned by mid-late afternoon here in UK. I can then make final prep being going through with it i hope.

Very sad, man. Are you sure you are not having second thoughts, though? What if your children have to cope with your loss and not ever see their dad again... That is heartbreaking

 

[Lostandfound7]

OK. Just take ur time n if u decide to postpone, it's all good..

 

[aukguy]

it breaks my heart to think of that as well - so i concentrate on the good times that they will have, the great family and friends - the lovely house and holidays at family home in spain

 

[TheSuicidalEccentric]

it breaks my heart to think of that as well - so i concentrate on the good times that they will have, the great family and friends - the lovely house and holidays at family home in spain

Your kids get criminal records and act out because they lost their dad to suicide. No Spain. They will not have good times when they lose their dad. When you lose your dad, all times become bad times.

 

[Lostandfound7]

it breaks my heart to think of that as well - so i concentrate on the good times that they will have, the great family and friends - the lovely house and holidays at family home in spain

Take ur time

 

[aukguy]

re postponing no - as said ive ruined all the good things that i had in my life, now its just the pain of the past and the present. they know i love them unconditionally

 

[Lostandfound7]

re postponing no - as said ive ruined all the good things that i had in my life, now its just the pain of the past and the present. they know i love them unconditionally

I'm sorry...

 

[Otter]

re postponing no - as said ive ruined all the good things that i had in my life, now its just the pain of the past and the present. they know i love them unconditionally

Hi there! Please feel free to block the person who is making totally inappropriate comments. He is a new member and I'm pretty sure he won't be for very long and he doesn't represent us in any way. We are a kind, sensitive and supportive bunch. I am new here as well, and these guys are the best. I'm so very sorry your circumstances has led you here today. I am in the US and it's a little after 5 a.m. . I should be awake for a few more hours if you need a listening ear!

 

[BPDbitch]

I'm sorry it's come to this, and sorry your thread got hijacked! I hope you find some peace whatever you choose, we will be here for you x

 

[lotus11]

good luck with whatever you choose