BecomingDiamond
"Happiness isn't a Luxury." -C
- Sep 25, 2024
- 13
I'm sorry for bothering people on here, but I want to ask/vent about something.
I made a post a while ago saying that I asked my brother if he wanted to end his life with me, because I plan to do it at the end of the year. (Or before my birthday of next year), I haven't told not a single other person but him and people here (and my therapist and psychiatrist I guess), and since he was saying the same thing, I just thought why not? But he said no. I don't talk about suicide AT ALL with anyone other than on this site, because I have a high EQ and I cannot put the ones I love through the stress of such things and it's hard to talk to a medical professional because Im very paranoid they'll call the cops on me and put me back in a psych ward, so it becomes an afterthought, dwelling in the back of my head.
But now my brother is saying he's gonna kill himself in six months again because his new girlfriend asked him to wait before they can have sex. (There's some other context, I'm just paraphrasing it.) And started texting me weird stuff like "Thank you for being a wonderful sister" and just weird stuff like that (Not saying the compliment is weird, just that the way he said it was like someone who is about to end their life.) Last night. It irritated me because I did what you're naturally supposed to do, (and also because his new girlfriend was worrying really bad and was about to call the cops) and he got mad at me when I tried to help him, one, and then got mad at me when I told him to just do it, I explained to him that I understand you're traumatized by your last relationship (Which is why you shouldn't have went into a new one so fucking fast, and instead healed and worked on yourself since you keep complaining about getting "low tier" women) and I understand your pain, I feel the same way, and I won't be mad if you ended your life, I'll be sad, heart broken and grief stricken, but not mad.
And then he gets mad at me, he gets mad at his girlfriend for her telling me why he's acting this way and the like. He ruined a really good part of the anime I was watching, because he's more important to me than a damn anime.
At this point I don't know what to do, his friends has become completely numb to whenever he says it because he says it so much and it's starting to irritate me because I actually want to commit, even though I don't want to die, I also... Do want to die and I want him to be alright too, but he's acting like the boy who cried wolf. I don't understand why everyone needs to know you want to die too (And I'm talking about people who are just normies who don't wanna hear people wanting to die 24/7, and not tell people who are trying to help, but you just refuse any and ALL help. Some people would literally kill to have the support he does, Some people are killing themselves BECAUSE they lack the basic fundamental support like a "Hi, How you doing? Tell me what's wrong" and a hug.) When there are places like this site to speak on it.
So if anyone does this, tells everyone they are going to kill themselves for the reaction(?) And never ever do it, why? I wanna know... Sorry for bothering you all again with my stupidity, I just don't have no one else to speak to on this.
I made a post a while ago saying that I asked my brother if he wanted to end his life with me, because I plan to do it at the end of the year. (Or before my birthday of next year), I haven't told not a single other person but him and people here (and my therapist and psychiatrist I guess), and since he was saying the same thing, I just thought why not? But he said no. I don't talk about suicide AT ALL with anyone other than on this site, because I have a high EQ and I cannot put the ones I love through the stress of such things and it's hard to talk to a medical professional because Im very paranoid they'll call the cops on me and put me back in a psych ward, so it becomes an afterthought, dwelling in the back of my head.
But now my brother is saying he's gonna kill himself in six months again because his new girlfriend asked him to wait before they can have sex. (There's some other context, I'm just paraphrasing it.) And started texting me weird stuff like "Thank you for being a wonderful sister" and just weird stuff like that (Not saying the compliment is weird, just that the way he said it was like someone who is about to end their life.) Last night. It irritated me because I did what you're naturally supposed to do, (and also because his new girlfriend was worrying really bad and was about to call the cops) and he got mad at me when I tried to help him, one, and then got mad at me when I told him to just do it, I explained to him that I understand you're traumatized by your last relationship (Which is why you shouldn't have went into a new one so fucking fast, and instead healed and worked on yourself since you keep complaining about getting "low tier" women) and I understand your pain, I feel the same way, and I won't be mad if you ended your life, I'll be sad, heart broken and grief stricken, but not mad.
And then he gets mad at me, he gets mad at his girlfriend for her telling me why he's acting this way and the like. He ruined a really good part of the anime I was watching, because he's more important to me than a damn anime.
At this point I don't know what to do, his friends has become completely numb to whenever he says it because he says it so much and it's starting to irritate me because I actually want to commit, even though I don't want to die, I also... Do want to die and I want him to be alright too, but he's acting like the boy who cried wolf. I don't understand why everyone needs to know you want to die too (And I'm talking about people who are just normies who don't wanna hear people wanting to die 24/7, and not tell people who are trying to help, but you just refuse any and ALL help. Some people would literally kill to have the support he does, Some people are killing themselves BECAUSE they lack the basic fundamental support like a "Hi, How you doing? Tell me what's wrong" and a hug.) When there are places like this site to speak on it.
So if anyone does this, tells everyone they are going to kill themselves for the reaction(?) And never ever do it, why? I wanna know... Sorry for bothering you all again with my stupidity, I just don't have no one else to speak to on this.
