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BlackCatTalk

BlackCatTalk

StrayCat
Apr 28, 2019
208
I do not know where to start, it is not my farewell note, it is only an informal talk, until now I only live in two states, the first completely depressed thanks to the benzos and the second is empty, I know that many here have a very bad time here, have serious money problems, with their family or someone else's suffering, each type of pain is important, regardless of age or economic or physical condition.

I will not talk about my particular case because I do not think anyone gives a shit, what I mean is that I felt the need to leave soon, I do not think I can leave here a note of farewell or anything like that because I am not very good With the words, but what I do feel is that I do not want to cause resentment to anyone or that they believe that they are not important to me, I do not know if keeping away the people you love the most is the most convenient thing or staying there with them?

From experience I know that when someone leaves there are many ideas that invade your head such as: he does not care what I felt or I was worth nothing to that person and blah blah blah ... Is that tendency to personalize too much, to give too much importance to ourselves, the same tendency that makes me believe that we need to say goodbye to someone to make them feel important or perhaps to make us feel important, to justify or have a witness of what happened and why? But anyway, I don't think anybody cares about this shit much beyond the first lines, they are just cheap hallucinations, in short I don't think my person is important but I do believe in the importance of other people and what I would least like is that like any selfish sense that we all have, I never want someone whom I love to feel the same way as I do, that is unimportant or that it was not worth staying for this person or people and I know that nobody would give a damn about the reasons why I am leaving and that is fine, but what is important are the feelings of those people that I must leave behind, so should I cut off all relationships with them or should I continue to the end? What is your opinion? Or maybe nothing is worth it.
Love y'all!
 

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Deleted member 19654

Deleted member 19654

Working towards recovery.
Jul 9, 2020
1,627
It's a difficult one. From cutting off relationships or staying till the end to ctb and leaving the earth permanently, it all results in hurting people we leave behind.
Also, don't feel like you can't talk about your problems because people don't care. Feel free to talk if you want to. We can understand each other on this site because we are in similar situations. Similarly to what you said, I don't really care about myself but I care about others. A lot of people can probably relate to that.
 
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Deleted member 17949

Deleted member 17949

Visionary
May 9, 2020
2,238
I don't think I need a formal goodbye for that reason. I'm not an big influence on anyone and I don't need to waste time writing a big speech for people to read after I'm gone.
 

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