blackorchid
Facing the brink.
- Mar 27, 2026
- 61
I'm tired, my heart is broken and I just want to rest. I wish my body somehow collapsed into pieces or I got a heart attack, because seemingly that's the only way society understands you are exhausted and not faking.
I've always been huge, and ever since I can remember, I'm just a bull. I feel like an animal that takes a lot to kill. tick skin, bigger than the average, big bones. always eating enormous amount of foods to fill the void, always needing high doses in medication to feel changes. I just hope my body stopped and I hadn't this huge body.
never anyone pays attention to the fat girl struggling because she's always crazy and disgusting.
i'm so tired. everyone aknowledges that I should make a change and that i'm up to no good, but what should I do? I try my best to keep my demons at bay best I can, but nothing I do is ever enough.
my whole self is shattered to pieces. I just wish my body could reflect that and people stopped making stupid asumptions about me because of I look. it's not about them, it's just the fact that a fat girl never seems tired or deppresed without being judged.
I've always been huge, and ever since I can remember, I'm just a bull. I feel like an animal that takes a lot to kill. tick skin, bigger than the average, big bones. always eating enormous amount of foods to fill the void, always needing high doses in medication to feel changes. I just hope my body stopped and I hadn't this huge body.
never anyone pays attention to the fat girl struggling because she's always crazy and disgusting.
i'm so tired. everyone aknowledges that I should make a change and that i'm up to no good, but what should I do? I try my best to keep my demons at bay best I can, but nothing I do is ever enough.
my whole self is shattered to pieces. I just wish my body could reflect that and people stopped making stupid asumptions about me because of I look. it's not about them, it's just the fact that a fat girl never seems tired or deppresed without being judged.
