22yearsbroken
Lost in the dark... with no sign of light
- Feb 15, 2025
- 419
I just need to vent and rant i guess...
Ive spent the last 10 days dealing with a good friend.. and im tired .
Taken me and his ex wife numerous attempts to him to hospital dur to his alcohol consumption.. he was in a total mess .. beyond words vomit piss and shit covered and we finally got him admitted to do a detox.. niw this is nothing new to me as i myself have been down the even worse end of this stick and ive ended up with a terminal diagnosis.. he how ever has not gor that far.. so after getting him hospital and sitting in A&E for 19 hours and then the next night by his side...for 10 hours.. ive spent 3 days cleaning his house as ive seen cleaner pig stys..running around sorting out dycking everything to keep him alive .. dealing qith his parents ex wife bis bills his debt collextors.. fuxking everything...
More than i could probably type...all coming back from a holiday i went on to try and find sone peace ... and think
Now he is not a member here and has no intentions its been more of an in direct self harm..
So why did i do all of this and run my seld into the ground and spw d a ahed load of cash doing all of this...
People keep telling me .. oh your so selfless and a great friend...
It winds me up ..
Because i ha e only ever done all this for one person and tbats his 8 yr old daughter not for him...i spent a rin of ash redecorating her bedroom to make her smile ...
And now im Just tired.. and want to curl up and be out cold which im currently in the process of doing with some heavy medication.. codiene, zopiclone, zolpidem, tremedol, mirtazipine, proprqnalol..
So i guess why im angry and stressed and need to vent ... i know for a fact he would never be rhere for me and he is axtually aware that i am using a certain site .. he doesnt know it here but ...
I just arrrggggghhhh .
Ive spent the last 10 days dealing with a good friend.. and im tired .
Taken me and his ex wife numerous attempts to him to hospital dur to his alcohol consumption.. he was in a total mess .. beyond words vomit piss and shit covered and we finally got him admitted to do a detox.. niw this is nothing new to me as i myself have been down the even worse end of this stick and ive ended up with a terminal diagnosis.. he how ever has not gor that far.. so after getting him hospital and sitting in A&E for 19 hours and then the next night by his side...for 10 hours.. ive spent 3 days cleaning his house as ive seen cleaner pig stys..running around sorting out dycking everything to keep him alive .. dealing qith his parents ex wife bis bills his debt collextors.. fuxking everything...
More than i could probably type...all coming back from a holiday i went on to try and find sone peace ... and think
Now he is not a member here and has no intentions its been more of an in direct self harm..
So why did i do all of this and run my seld into the ground and spw d a ahed load of cash doing all of this...
People keep telling me .. oh your so selfless and a great friend...
It winds me up ..
Because i ha e only ever done all this for one person and tbats his 8 yr old daughter not for him...i spent a rin of ash redecorating her bedroom to make her smile ...
And now im Just tired.. and want to curl up and be out cold which im currently in the process of doing with some heavy medication.. codiene, zopiclone, zolpidem, tremedol, mirtazipine, proprqnalol..
So i guess why im angry and stressed and need to vent ... i know for a fact he would never be rhere for me and he is axtually aware that i am using a certain site .. he doesnt know it here but ...
I just arrrggggghhhh .
