Venting Thoughts are worse at night

[VampQueen]

my SI goes into over drive at night. Im not sure why but it does. I felt pretty good today and it was a decent day but after what feels like and hour of video games, i cant help but feel empty and suicidal. Never fails to feel this way every night. I just feel this emptiness and boredem 24/7, in constant mental anguish but its so much worse at night. I think maybe i should CTB but idk if i can. Everytime i get on the road i just wish a car plows into me and kills me. I need a quick and painless death. Like i never knew what happened. end my missery.

 

[doomer843]

Same.. It would make sense if I was at work distracted or something all day but I just sit in my room and do the same thing day and night

 

[qhifwu4h5o]

It was always the same way for me, at least before antidepressants. I'd normally just take pills and sleep so I don't have to deal with SI at night

 

[SueAsyde]

Thank god i'm not the only one with this issue. It's so mentally torturing wanting to have some peace while the surroundings are quiet, which is why i stay awake late at night, but it's not quiet in my head. All of those thoughts rush. I should go to sleep but i also want to enjoy the peace of my environment at this time.

 

[VampQueen]

Thank god i'm not the only one with this issue. It's so mentally torturing wanting to have some peace while the surroundings are quiet, which is why i stay awake late at night, but it's not quiet in my head. All of those thoughts rush. I should go to sleep but i also want to enjoy the peace of my environment at this time.

Literally 1 for 1 how I think. I just want to enjoy the peacefulness of the quiet night but my brain says "no"

 

[Raindancer]

I was going to write the exact same thing. I have always been a night owl and love the peace and quiet of the night. I am usually up most nights and love it. But the downside is it absolutely seems to intensify the thoughts and anxiety when they come. I don't know why it makes it worse.

 

[anotherlastchance]

I drink beer before going to sleep this helps me finding comfort with SI thoughts

 

[iloverachel]

I can relate, being in a constant state of mental anguish is awful.

Whenever I go out in public I always wish a truck just runs me over

 

[ilvgore]

I kind of relate to you. The urge to suicide is more prevalent at a particular time. For me it is 10am to 4pm. It just feels like i wasnt being productive enough and it makes me wanna suicide so badly oh my gosh. At night or evening i am telling myself oh i can try again i was or am to tired and tomorrow is a new day. But the next day i have all these bad thoghts cause of yesterday and the pressure for today ._.

 

[ThymeToLeave]

Have you heard of HALT? Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. These things make negative thoughts and feelings flare up.