Discussion Those who survived their last attempt, what was your method and what went wrong?

[thefinalfavour]

Are you still sticking with the same method or have you moved on to another one?

 

[anhedonic_moron]

tried to mindlessly hang myself again this morning in the washroom, used a thick electrical extension chord connected to the heater as my "rope" but it was really uncomfortable to since the thickness pushed my larynx in, might do it again might not

 

[l1ablemistakes]

OD'd on Valium. Took about 25 before I chickened out and stashed the rest. Called an ambulance. Sat in a corridor in a hallway for 8 hours. They didn't even put me on a hold, I got out the same day. Next time I'm hanging myself. It won't fail.

 

[tsykoais]

pills, multiple times over the past few years i kinda figured they would never work but i kept hoping bc back then i didn't have access to anything else. always the same outcome i would pass out and wake up covered in my own vomit.

 

[Samira_Hura]

I tried fentanyl, but it saved me. For two weeks I couldn't walk or even wash myself. Now I walk with difficulty, but I can. The speech therapist is helping me with language because I'm having trouble speaking, but they've already told me that it won't go away.

 

[nitrogenous]

This was prior to me being on the forum so I was naive, but my last attempt was out of impulsivity. It was overdosing and I think as I've overdosed with the same meds just 3 months prior, my body already knew that something was wrong so I started throwing up before I could swallow everything. Plus, my social worker sensed that I was going to end my life when I met her just hours prior, so apparently she called the ambulance already even before I attempted and they came shortly after I took the pills… I did go to the emergency but they just took my blood test, found out it was still somewhat okay and sent me home straight after with no treatment…

This was prior to me being on the forum so I was naive, but my last attempt was out of impulsivity. It was overdosing and I think as I've overdosed with the same meds just 3 months prior, my body already knew that something was wrong so I started throwing up before I could swallow everything. Plus, my social worker sensed that I was going to end my life when I met her just hours prior, so apparently she called the ambulance already even before I attempted and they came shortly after I took the pills… I did go to the emergency but they just took my blood test, found out it was still somewhat okay and sent me home straight after with no treatment…

Oh and I'm not going with the same method anymore. I'm doing SN next. I already have the SN with me and it was a really close call to me doing it just on Thursday night, but I ended up ordering some prescription meds as part of the protocol instead. I'm waiting for the meds to make the attempt more peaceful next time, but I think if I'm that desperate, I would still ctb without having to wait for the pills to arrive.

 

[Kayla]

My method was SN. But I didn't have it planned for the day I did it. So I didn't follow any "protocol" but I actually didn't need it. Long story short, I took 7g of SN in front of the police, I got airlifted to the hospital, where I then had a cardiac arrest. It took them 25 minutes to get my heart going again, and I was in a coma for a while. When I finally woke up, I had to learn how to walk again. As soon as I was discharged home, I ended up buying the SN again, so I have it when I need it.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

My "attempts" feel more like rehearsal or suicide theater. I never made the choice to die and accept the pain of hanging as the price.

I've tied the rope and stood on the chair 5-10x. The closest I've come is hanging for a moment with my hands on the rope. I bloodied up my thumbs doing that.

My SN got intercepted. I could theoretically buy a gun but cowardice and ignorance keep stopping me. Hanging is what I have at my disposal. I might try again tonight/tomorrow morning under cover of darkness with more neck padding but a smart gambler would not put money on me dying.

 

[TomIsNotMyName]

I wanted to CTB using SN and I backed out after only taking a few tiny sips, but I still almost died. I would choose the same method again, but I probably won't try again in the near future

 

[Untoten_]

Are you still sticking with the same method or have you moved on to another one?

OD'ing on SSRI's and beta blockers. I got close, like if I wasn't found close.

But yes I was found.

 

[spiders.in.my.head]

Ligature strangulation. I couldnt pull the ligature tight enough, didnt pass out. Some capillaries around my eyes burst, at least thats what i think the little purple-red dots probably were.
I don't think I will stick with this method, since i think i have enough time to plan for a better one, but if things get worse again and i haven't secured another method, I'll probably try it again.

 

[Arvayn]

Malnutrition. Not VSED, but selectively eating only garbage foods that are filling and yet extremely unnourishing. I did this for a very long time, entire months. Eventually, I became so malnourished that my immune system became dangerously deficient. I caught a bacterial disease of some sort and it put me in a life-threatening condition after successfully making its way to my blood. I survived because I was rushed to the hospital after I was seen collapsing to the floor on my way to the bathroom. I would have rather peacefully slipped away otherwise, given enough time-- which I had more than enough patience for.

 

[kouna]

Jumped from the 3rd floor.
Didn't work because it was done on impulse after a panic attack.
Spent a few weeks at the hospital and a few months recovering.

 

[T22222222]

Jumped from the 3rd floor.
Didn't work because it was done on impulse after a panic attack.
Spent a few weeks at the hospital and a few months recovering.

do you remember what you were thinking while jumping/ if it hurt when you hit the ground?

 

[dontwakemeup]

I've had a few attempts, always pills. My last attempt were pills but each attempt is different pills. I fell asleep and woke up grossly sick. I was miserable. I would've called 911 but didn't want an attempt on my record and a psych hold so I endured yhe agony. The next 3 days felt like my throat was swollen so I couldn't eat, just barely swallow my sleeping pills to stay sleep. That was my last attempt and just waiting for my natural death. I will always have SI's, but I won't act on them anymore.

 

[kouna]

do you remember what you were thinking while jumping/ if it hurt when you hit the ground?

I just ran and jumped over the balcony rail, not much thought, just wanted it to get over quickly. Didn't stop to hesitate or think about it.

I think my brain protected me by losing consciousness mid-air, opened my eyes and my right leg and arm were messed up and also had a cut over my right eyebrow from my glasses.I don't have any recollection of the impact.

 

[Ixio]

Are you still sticking with the same method or have you moved on to another one?

I tried the "night-night" method with the cornsacks and an endless ratchet, I couldn't get the straps on properly and the cornsacks didn't apply enough pressure on the carotid arteries. Jumping will probably be the method I go with, at least Ill get to know how it feels like to fly for a few seconds.

 

[Wakawaka]

last method was sn, was drinking alcohol and sipping the mixture, i didnt care how long it took since I was outside, i think by the time i got to half the bottle i wasnt feeling it anymore. made myself throw up, hung around a bit more than urbered home. i stepped out the car and immediately feel on my back. i was in and out of consciousnesses. eventually made it in the house and slept it off lol. felt a bit weak but besides that nothing else not even a hang over. i would stick with sn