danzk

danzk

Member
Apr 27, 2023
51
Is killing yourself really a selfish act?
 
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bearbrikk

bearbrikk

Listen to the voice in your head
May 2, 2024
121
People are gonna write paragraphs as an awnser to this thread. But there is only one simple clear awnse.. NO
 
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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,251
It's definitely a "self-prioritizing" act.
 
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Linda

Linda

Member
Jul 30, 2020
1,685
Is killing yourself really a selfish act?
I would say that usually it's not selfish at all. For most people who die by suicide it's more a matter of necessity. But if you have dependents it may be selfish, to a greater or lesser extent.
 
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Unknown21

Unknown21

The past never dies.
Apr 25, 2023
1,005
It is not a selfish act, of course. Every person is free in his life, but it must be taken into account that your death will affect those around you, so you must take the necessary measures to reduce any resulting harm to them.
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
7,256
Without getting into semantics, whether the act of killing yourself is "self-prioritizing", or selfish, I do think it's selfish, strictly from the standpoint that it is being done to fulfill some kind of need for youself - to stop physical pain, mental anguish, get out of a dire circumstance, what have you. If your ctb benefits someone else somehow, that is secondary. The primary benefactor of ctb is yourself, and by definition, that makes it selfish.

Honestly, I don't see the big deal about whether it is selfish. We do things just for ourselves all the time. I don't think selfish in this regard should have the negative connotation that it does. Suicide is usually a "last resort" kind of thing, and if stopping years of pain, or anguish, after other avenues of resolving the issues didn't work out, is called selfish, then so be it.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,921
No, I think those who procreate even know existing is nothing but meaningless suffering and expect others to continue existing no matter what even know nobody consented to any of this are the selfish ones. Suicide is a human right, it's disgusting to label people as "selfish" for wanting to free themselves from this existence that was so cruelly imposed in the first place. Forcing life here will always be the selfish act no matter what and if one wants to free themselves from the imposition they should simply be able to, suicide is a personal decision anyway, it's not about other people.
 
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U

UKscotty

Doesn't read PMs
May 20, 2021
2,450
Depends on the situation. If someone has dependants etc then it can be very selfish to leave them to fend for themselves.

Also selfish if its an easy way out to avoid paying back a debt or facing prison etc.

I think it really depends.
 
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Dusk till dawn

Dusk till dawn

Student
Sep 7, 2018
199
Suicide isn't selfish, you own your life, your body, it's your own property, you don't have to share things you own for the sake of people, that's your own personal decision, you are not selfish for taking your life, you don't have any obligation to live for others
 
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H

Hotsackage

Enlightened
Mar 11, 2019
1,040
Idk I wouldn't do it to my family, but it is a spiritual and philosophical question, time goes on, but some of our problems don't.
 
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nightlygem

nightlygem

La Joya
Sep 27, 2023
185
Short answer: No.

My longer answer: it depends on your motivation. Like, killing yourself because you hate someone. Coming from someone who has had these thoughts, if one decides to kill themselves out of pure spite and revenge, it is purely a selfish act. Of course, this is a very rare scenario, but I can tell you that as someone who has considered suicide just to make someone learn the error of their ways, I know for certain that this is spiteful and selfish behavior. Of course, there is the other side of this that their hatred for someone is too painful that they decide to end their life for their own sake. In that case, no it's not selfish.
And, before anyone comments on this, no I am not planning on CTBing for revenge. I have a disorder that unfortunately makes me have extreme impulses. However, this is not a consistent thought and my suicidal tendencies and thoughts are much greater than my hatred for this person. Killing myself is probably what they would want, anyways.

I'm always open for discussion on this as well.
 
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thealteredmind

thealteredmind

Experienced
Apr 2, 2024
231
the "selfish" argument can be inverted easily.

"if you kill yourself you are selfish! we will suffer!"

yeah but if I don't then I'm the one STILL suffering so that makes YOU selfish

easy.
 
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L

LaughingGoat

Mage
Apr 11, 2024
590
If the goal is open discussion, excellent, but you'll never find a succinct and all-encompassing answer to such a broad ethical question, only confirmation bias. There are too many different situations one can be in and social dependencies that differ by individual for anyone to answer this without exception.

The simple facts for most people in most typical situations are this:

1) It will end the person's suffering
2) It will cause harm to loved ones

The individual living through their suffering needs to look over their own ideals and ethics to decide whether that is an action they are willing to commit to. People saying it's not selfish in any way are likely coping around that fact unless they are talking about the rare situations where no harm would be caused. BTW I don't think there is an objective good or bad, people who are in pain have the right to end their suffering regardless if it's selfish or not, but you asked if it is selfish not if it's "right or wrong".
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2024
3,276
Its selfish to make people stay when they are always suffering
 
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prototypian

prototypian

Member
May 6, 2024
81
I hate that sentiment for many logical reasons: 1) the choice isn't because it's a fun activity-choosing to drink after 10 years of sobriety when you have worked very hard to stay sober would be selfish-choosing to overeat when someone next to you is starving of hunger would be selfish. The choice of suicide as an act is a decision made almost always to try and stop hurting.
2) after you're gone you won't actually be there to explain yourself. There isn't a way to define the actions as selfish except to simply have a label as "that was selfish"
But this is like seeing someone in a nice outfit and saying "they are rich". The label is made without context and that is wrong.
3) the very existence of this forum indicates that the act isn't easy.
 
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jbear824

jbear824

F*ck humanity. Let's end this.
Jul 4, 2023
409
Yes, but not in a negative way. I think of suicide as a last resort kind of self medication. You are allowed to treat your own suffering. You are allowed to put your needs first, even if that need is to no longer be alive.

Existing for others is a good way to exacerbate your misery and suffering.

The truly selfish ones are the one who want you to continue to suffer so that they don't have to experience loss or pain. Even though that's what life is.
 
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angel31

angel31

sause
Jun 14, 2023
255
I dont believe so. Im gonna give the reasoning i got from "die leiden des jungen werther" bei goethe (great book btw).
Is smb who dies from a fever selfish? Or weak? Nah he just died bc his illness was too much for his body to bear. Well therefore if ur illness or situation or whatever is too much for ur mind to bear, are u selfish or weak for dying?
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,881
Yes but I'd say it wasn't the prime motivation in the way other selfish acts are done. I'd say most selfish acts are done in order to gain something. You could argue that suicidal people are wanting to gain peace but- that doesn't really work to my mind. If we succeed, we won't be alive to experience it!

I'd argue that suicidal people simply want to escape a life they find too painful to live. Is it selfish to want to be out of pain? Surely not. Surely- it's more selfish to expect someone to stay and suffer here because you don't want to miss them.

The problem in all of this is- we don't know another person's mind and they don't know ours. They can't comprehend how we feel entirely and we can't really guess how our suicide will affect them. So- how can we judge who is or will suffer more?
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,156
For me it's selfish either way. If I don't kill myself it will also purely be for selfish reasons. At least my reasons for killing myself are a slight bit more altruistic simply because removing myself from existence will spare so much pain from other people's lives than if I were to continue to live.
 
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S

SMmetalhead36

Ready to have my forever date with suicide
Oct 6, 2023
317
For the most part no, but as a previous poster stated if you're doing it to avoid prison ( especially for something like murder or other violent crimes or
crimes that have a serious impact on others like major fraud or scamming then yes.
 
K

Kalista

Failed hard to pull the trigger - Now using SN
Feb 5, 2023
378
Is killing yourself really a selfish act?
no.

it's labeled as selfish because other people are going to get hurt from your loss. it's your choice. period.

don't let yourself be in repetitive pain just because others tell you "think about your family and friends. how would they feel once you're gone?"
a highly ignorant line.

ask yourself this, how would YOU feel if you stayed for others' feelings?

you have to know that everyone does things for their own pleasure, for their own benefit no matter what the fuck they say or what their reasoning is. the word 'selfish' is just used in a negative connotation in this case in order to shame you from killing yourself.
it's only selfish when you believe it to be.

be selfish. you have the damn right to.
 
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enough of this

enough of this

Specialist
Jun 4, 2023
382
Only in connotative terms. Selfishness is self concern, and there's nothing wrong with that.
 
P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,540
It's not selfish it's self care when life is so unbearable that there is no other way out anymore.
 
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enough of this

enough of this

Specialist
Jun 4, 2023
382
It's not selfish it's self care when life is so unbearable that there is no other way out anymore.
Exactly. And I do miss Dr. Kevorkian. He provided such a wonderful service. I wish he were here for me.
Can you imagine how great it would be to leave the way he allowed people to go? No muss, no fuss.
Just a painless drifting off. Mmmmmm.... šŸ˜Œ
 
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