Venting This Site is a Dud...

[thenamingofcats]

Just say "sorry about that thread I was on drugs" and then try to make a graceful exit back onto the rest of the forum.

 

[Dot]

Slf cn undrstnd tht OP = feelng rough & postd a vent & cn undrstnd Y sme ppl reactd bt pls b awre tht if thred = goin2 trn in2 bck & frth of squabblng = wll b lockd

 

[Saturn_]

I mean this as respectfully as possible, because I know people repeat things similar to what you said a lot, but I feel like it's very dismissive to write off anyone's suicidal ideation as a product of being "fashionably suicidal". Descriptors like this are typically aimed at the youth, and while they may not actually end up killing themselves, I don't feel like that is something which should be waved off or condemned at all.

I have been struggling with constant suicidal ideation ever since childhood, and I've gone through that mentality of believing that I'm the only one around me who is "actually suicidal". But as I've grown up, I instead think it's highly concerning how people even come to treat suicide so flippantly to begin with. I think it speaks volumes about the state of our world, where everyone has been assaulted with tragedy on top of tragedy, exemplified by developments of the information age -- that we have reached a new level of illness and desensitization, where suicide is now viewed with the same severity and finality as a rainy day.

You may shake your head at what some of these so-called fashionably suicidal people have to say, and sometimes I can't help but do the same. But I think it's important to realize that beyond this subconscious dismissal, this is a behavior which extends far beyond the individual. These people deserve an outlet as much as the rest of us. Their pain is as real as anyone else's, and the way it's articulated may come off as cringe-worthy. But I don't think it's worth writing off these expressions based off of personal impressions alone.

 

[UKscotty]

We already have other users who tell us every few days how much they hate the site, despite posting thousands of times and being here throughout the day.

As with any site, no one is forcing you to be here.

We have an index of methods, intuitively most people know how to CTB. We have literally thousands of threads asking the exact same thing about SN every day.

The purpose of the site is talk with like minded people. Methods themselves have been reviewed to death, excuse the pun. So talking about particular methods is all but pointless as this stage.

 

[bipbapbop]

I'm going to be honest and say that I didn't read all of your responses before I respond.

I understand your frustration at this forum but I believe that this is just how forums are generally run. I joined around the same time as you and I have found this place to be unbelievably helpful in forcing me to understand what is hurting me and my desires to CTB. I've also developed a lot of empathy for the pain that everyone goes through. I will say, however, that this forum is only as useful as you make it. I have made some threads and reached out to people and have always received fantastic and thoughtful responses. I haven't checked your post history, but have you considered tailoring your own experience here by asking the questions or starting the topics you want to see?

I hope you find relief in your pain somehow much like this forum does for me.

 

[Grumble]

I mean this as respectfully as possible, because I know people repeat things similar to what you said a lot, but I feel like it's very dismissive to write off anyone's suicidal ideation as a product of being "fashionably suicidal". Descriptors like this are typically aimed at the youth, and while they may not actually end up killing themselves, I don't feel like that is something which should be waved off or condemned at all.

I agree with this, and I've gotta say I've been on and off with this forum since 2018 and can't recall even one time when I've read a member's comments and figured them for just being "fashionably suicidal" (since we're going with that phrase). And I say this as someone who tends to judge other people very harshly.

I'm sure there are some members here who are like that, but I feel like this place would actually scare off a lot of the people that this phrase would apply to.

Suicidality occurs on a spectrum, so maybe this is more an issue of you @DefinitelyReady being on the severe end of that spectrum rather than any fault of the forum or its membership.

 

[DefinitelyReady]

Just say "sorry about that thread I was on drugs" and then try to make a graceful exit back onto the rest of the forum.

Nope. I stand by my shit....

I'm sorry if I may have contributed to your perception of the inadequacy of this site. I've been meaning to CTB for years if that's any consolation.

Sometimes my replies don't show up so I'll just double-check. You're good. Nothing to apologize for.

 

[WoNkEy_DoNkEy]

May I remind you that membership of this site is not compulsory. If you don't find the site helpful, you are under no obligation to use it.
If you have some positive suggestions about how the site could be improved, I'm sure they would be welcomed.

@Linda All this is missing is 'young man/ lady' at the beginning of your post and it'd be the perfect elderly lady comment

 

[thealteredmind]

I'm 32 and have been suicidal since childhood

so you are not that different from a lot of people here. there's a reason you haven't CBT'ed yet. people don't want to die, even if the suffering is excruciatingly high.

welcome home

 

[DefinitelyReady]

I'm sorry if I may have contributed to your perception of the inadequacy of this site. I've been meaning to CTB for years if that's any consolation.

Sometimes my replies don't show up so I'll just double-check. You're good. Nothing to apologize for.

I think this place could be better organized. I think you make a good point about that. Correct me if I'm wrong though - your post leaves the impression that some people aren't 'truly wishing to CTB' or are serious enough are making it harder for you to find methods? Did I read that right?

I think this place could be better organized. I think you make a good point about that. Correct me if I'm wrong though - your post leaves the impression that some people aren't 'truly wishing to CTB' or are serious enough are making it harder for you to find methods? Did I read that right?

Somewhat. There are obvious posts where someone's frame o mind at that particular moment, is more focused on chit chat or whatever they're posting about, and it's annoying having to sort through what's what to find the content I'm more focused on. Obviously there aren't enough categories or something etc. The posts are obvious and it's already exhausting enough to exert energy to read what you'd like to, but having to sift tbrough people who are in a different mood is discouraging, and I thought this site was meant to lead you to the opposite feeling. Just irritating.

 

[theboy]

I really don't understand your point

 

[DefinitelyReady]

I mean this as respectfully as possible, because I know people repeat things similar to what you said a lot, but I feel like it's very dismissive to write off anyone's suicidal ideation as a product of being "fashionably suicidal". Descriptors like this are typically aimed at the youth, and while they may not actually end up killing themselves, I don't feel like that is something which should be waved off or condemned at all.

I have been struggling with constant suicidal ideation ever since childhood, and I've gone through that mentality of believing that I'm the only one around me who is "actually suicidal". But as I've grown up, I instead think it's highly concerning how people even come to treat suicide so flippantly to begin with. I think it speaks volumes about the state of our world, where everyone has been assaulted with tragedy on top of tragedy, exemplified by developments of the information age -- that we have reached a new level of illness and desensitization, where suicide is now viewed with the same severity and finality as a rainy day.

You may shake your head at what some of these so-called fashionably suicidal people have to say, and sometimes I can't help but do the same. But I think it's important to realize that beyond this subconscious dismissal, this is a behavior which extends far beyond the individual. These people deserve an outlet as much as the rest of us. Their pain is as real as anyone else's, and the way it's articulated may come off as cringe-worthy. But I don't think it's worth writing off these expressions based off of personal impressions alone.

It wasn't meant to dismiss, minimalize, or invalidate someone's pain, but more to call out those who clog the forum. Again, it was a 'venting' post. Am I not allotted that right? There are some trivial posts on there so it's more so defending people who are in pain, from having to coarse through posts that they could've written someone else, or had a chance to post somewhere else if that was an option. When you're in pain, you're not wanting to waft through needless nonsense that doesn't fit a "sanctioned suicide" worthy title.

I really don't understand your point

I mean this as respectfully as possible, because I know people repeat things similar to what you said a lot, but I feel like it's very dismissive to write off anyone's suicidal ideation as a product of being "fashionably suicidal". Descriptors like this are typically aimed at the youth, and while they may not actually end up killing themselves, I don't feel like that is something which should be waved off or condemned at all.

I have been struggling with constant suicidal ideation ever since childhood, and I've gone through that mentality of believing that I'm the only one around me who is "actually suicidal". But as I've grown up, I instead think it's highly concerning how people even come to treat suicide so flippantly to begin with. I think it speaks volumes about the state of our world, where everyone has been assaulted with tragedy on top of tragedy, exemplified by developments of the information age -- that we have reached a new level of illness and desensitization, where suicide is now viewed with the same severity and finality as a rainy day.

You may shake your head at what some of these so-called fashionably suicidal people have to say, and sometimes I can't help but do the same. But I think it's important to realize that beyond this subconscious dismissal, this is a behavior which extends far beyond the individual. These people deserve an outlet as much as the rest of us. Their pain is as real as anyone else's, and the way it's articulated may come off as cringe-worthy. But I don't think it's worth writing off these expressions based off of personal impressions

We already have other users who tell us every few days how much they hate the site, despite posting thousands of times and being here throughout the day.

As with any site, no one is forcing you to be here.

We have an index of methods, intuitively most people know how to CTB. We have literally thousands of threads asking the exact same thing about SN every day.

The purpose of the site is talk with like minded people. Methods themselves have been reviewed to death, excuse the pun. So talking about particular methods is all but pointless as this stage.

That is your opinion, and I've already posted mine. Nothing more to say.

I really don't understand your point

Then I don't know what to tell you.

 

[WoNkEy_DoNkEy]

@DefinitelyReady Don't go

 

[Illegal Preclear]

Forgive me for not reading the entire thread, but what exactly are you looking for with this site? I think this site serves a fine purpose - a place for people who desire to CTB to congregate and discuss the prospect, and decide if it's the right choice for them. And there is a literal wealth of Megathreads that serve as guides here. There's an actual blow by blow account on here of someone CTBing with SN that I found fascinating.

If you're looking for JUST GUIDES: Go to the search engine Yandex - NOT GOOGLE, YANDEX - and search "reliable suicide methods." You're welcome.

And mind you, Yandex won't just bring up text guides - they got videos. You want to SEE video footage of every CTB method happening to real people in real time to know EXACTLY what you're in for: /h/suicide. Should come up as one of the first results on Yandex when searching suicide. (DISCLAIMER: I don't watch those videos because I'm a sick freak, I just want to know exactly what's going to happen to my body with each method before I make my final pick).

 

[DefinitelyReady]

This site has turned out to be a total let down... Aside from a few tips for methods that have yet (for me) to may or may not be helpful, this site has proven to be a complete bust... Its set up is completely annoying, inefficient, and inconvenient. The 'back button' is a bitch. You can't deselect specific alerts and content, and so you're often left hunting and sifting through loads of crap you're not even interested in! The people are not as self-serious as you thought/hoped they'd be. The stories do not leave the same impressions as they once did because you can't find your own caliber of people to read into their postings. Reminds me of my shitty small town library, where there is a large room with a large pile of crap seedily sectioned off where you have to exhaust yourself to find something worthwhile or useful. You don't leave with any renewed spirit, either leaning more or less towards CTB. There's little indication of finding out who the hell you're even talking to! The people are too similar and it's the same content over and over with different verbiage. I already spend enough time with the elderly and don't need an influx of suicidal dementia to sort through. This is really nothing more than a novelty suicide fantasy/escape space where people come to indulge in the vacation of "leaving." Why can't there be a section specific for these things? Its free-for-all dormitory style creates a time-wasting, energy-sucking source just like anything else on the internet. This is supposed to be a super specific spot meant for specific use; and yet, somehow it's become all bubblegum pop suicide for the most part, in the style of a shitty Craigslist for the Suicidal... I've used this place at least a few times a week for like a month, and have generally learned nothing except that people won't try to talk you out of your choice, which is already "sanctioned" by the title. This isn't supposed to be the one-for-all suicide site. Have a damn sucide penpal section and chat there! I'm 32yrs old (female, because who the f**k knows?) and have been researching methods of my own accord on and off for well over 15yrs. This site isn't much more than a social platform for the fashionably depressed, pierced with people who truly want the fuck out of this life; and who come to find like-minded people who share like minded ideas and knowledge that serve to exit this life in the most convenient and comfortable way(s). It needs to cater to the needs of the viewer or shut it the fuck down; and the followers who are seeking to actually ctb will start over again, and it'll leave out the whiny-boppers who will have to do a deep dive search and it'll come back as less contaminated with unnecessary plot points. Maybe there should be a separate site entirely for the community to be a community; because otherwise, it leaves the rest of us with true intentions to off ourselves to have to use this site like we're studying and taking an online course to ace our completed suicides. Having to search and sift, backwards and forwards, through virtually and literally the same things over and over, having to use this place like a dictionary and encyclopedia when its purpose is already permissible suicide ffs!! Filter this place. You have us set up accounts with vetting, and then you generally stop with any other organizational or construction on the forums. But god forbid you post about searching for a partner in the only suicide section, and not the "Megathread." Let's chop that off that because that doesn't fit ... because that is of utmost importance. This site needs a lot of reconstructing. Get on my damn nerves... Is this only me? I didn't come here to get sucked into another meaningless vortex of essentially useless chatter. I could've given myself permission to go watch actual bullshit videos on Youtube and would've come out more relaxed and decompressed than when getting off here. Maybe I'm in a particularly piss-poor fucking mood than usual. Maybe this site is lacking, and does more harm than good. Maybe go f*** yourself...

(The Departed, hello....?)
✌

Edit:: "whiny-boppers"

Whether you agree or not, move on. It's a vent...
Not here to debate my opinions.
Not trying to win or lose votes. Not a popularity contest.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Sometimes my replies don't show up so I'll just double-check. You're good. Nothing to apologize for.

Thanks. I did see your reply. I think I just don't get notified if I'm replied to in an edit though.

 

[DefinitelyReady]

@DefinitelyReady Don't go

Lol. Thx. Honestly, I wasn't quite ready to, but these gnats wouldn't fuck off with blowing up my alerts and it was counterproductive for me so I told them what they wanted to hear so they could stop caring and win. Before this post, if I didn't agree, I'd just move on. I wasn't trying to waste my time with a discussion on it. I might've labeled it 'Discussion' if that were the case. Wasn't trying to start a damn near chatroom. There's an actual chatroom already at least.

Thanks. I did see your reply. I think I just don't get notified if I'm replied to in an edit though.

Oh no it's fine. I didn't expect a reply. I just knew I had replied and it wasn't showing... Just wanted it to be clear in regard to you.

 

[bluegoldbear]

I actually do think you have a point. This site should at least have a search function.

 

[DefinitelyReady]

I actually do think you have a point. This site should at least have a search function.

It has a search bar, but if you're going to section off forums, don't make it a clusterfuck for depressed people. Was just the perfect storm of annoyance. Didn't plan to be "popular"...

 

[bluegoldbear]

@DefinitelyReady Was going to DM you because I am a 33 M in USA also, but it seems I don't have privileges yet.

 

[BardBarrie]

No Im pretty much done with this site. These were just my thoughts before I left.

Goodbye then. Hope you find what you're looking for.

 

[painoflife]

I think one thing to mention is that some of the rant/vent posts which (as I understand from reading this thread but may be wrong) you think of as being less important are actually very important to the author. Something which seems trivial to one person could be the catalyst or the tipping point for somebody else because we dont know what else is going on in their life.
Everybody is valid here.

 

[Esokabat]

I agree with the technical part. I am using this platform on my iphone and it is not user-friendly. My biggest complain that all browser control buttons disappear including the back button which makes I cannot go back to search results. I haven't seen any other site "hide" all browser control and functionality buttons. I can't imagine how it even does that as I didn't think this was even possible. I like the fact that there is a dark theme as I am visually impaired but the mobile layout, UI and functionality is not that great. I wish it would be more like the Reddit mobile app, a cleaner, more streamlined experience

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I actually do think you have a point. This site should at least have a search function.

It has.
It will appear when you have enough posts

 

[bluegoldbear]

It has.
It will appear when you have enough posts

that is so annoying

 

[LaughingGoat]

Oh I've done the work.... more than my fair share. I've pulled the trigger after loading it. But my dumbass had never used at the age of 20 and didnt know how to unlock the safety so it was locked. I only had a few minutes alone and had to put it back and was too afraid if I messed with it the wrong way it would be known that I had bothered it and I'd never see my niece again. My post didnt come from malice or was meant to dismiss anyone's pain. It was subjective and unfortunately completely misconstrued and misinterpreted. My choice of words werent at their peak as I had taken dextromethorphan. My insurance won't cover Auvelity so I buy it off amazon for now. It was riddled with errors as my phone is like 99% full and evidently slow and didn't process my corrections. I had double vision too. Im sorry if you were hurt by it. It obviously had nothing to do with you. But we all know there the forums are full of stuff that could belong elsewhere. I resented having to sort through all the files. Im not here to talk and make friends. I came for help in ending my life and things and even people on here were making that difficult. Hell FuneralCry just got berated for shellling out the same posts over and pver again, clogging the forum, when she could do that only her own profile page her posts are going to be the same and they all blasted her for that. She has over 30,000 posts. But they were still up my ass, trying to hit me harder than her. Hypocrites much? Anyway they dont matter. If they werent being rude, annoying, insensitive, selfish, etc. then it didn't apply to them. But they stick their noses wherever they'd like as far as I'm concerned. No one asked me what did I mean by this or that? What the hell was I talking about? That's the first time I had ever spoken to any those little turds. I know what I stand for, and if you have time to be hurt by a "long paragraph" than I'd say your life is better than mine. I don't have time or any energy to expend on someone I don't know saying "crap". Honestly I cant believe they cared. I didn't expect to geta single comment. I do my homework on everything. Sucks having to be your own dr, therapist, pharmacologist, psychiatrist, VET, etc. Biology is not be my major... I find it tedious and boring, and it aggravates the hell out my ocd. But I go into the offices each time telling them what I think and have read and we go for it, if I can convince them anyway. I dont think we need to share info or talk unless you had a specific reason. You can pm if you feel the need to. Hope this clarifies things.

I usually would make this comment in a more gentle way, but I respect you are speaking more bluntly and aren't interested in platitudes. You haven't done the work. I live in America as well and the ease with which anyone can get a gun would blow the minds of anyone on here who lives in most European or Asian countries. I taught literal middle schoolers who obtained guns illegally. There are youtube videos and tons of online resources which show every aspect of using any gun you could get your hands on. In the time you've spent on this thread alone, you could have learned all this information. You had a bad experience at 20 and 12 years later have made no progress. I'm not just saying this to you because I have seen it on this site quite a bit, but death by firearm in an informed manner is the simplest and most effective way someone can ctb without access to professional euthanasia. Choosing not to do so for whatever reason is fine, but it is learned helplessness to not make the effort to do so and rationalize that you have.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

that is so annoying

That's how it works on some other forums too. You can't unlock certain features until you have a certain amount of posts and/or have been on the site for a specific period of time.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Searching for a method for 15 years doesn't exactly ring the "seriousness" bell, imo. Seems like this "Craigslist for the Suicidal" site should be exactly what YOU are looking for.

Normally, when I don't like a movie, I get up and leave.

 

[DefinitelyReady]

I usually would make this comment in a more gentle way, but I respect you are speaking more bluntly and aren't interested in platitudes. You haven't done the work. I live in America as well and the ease with which anyone can get a gun would blow the minds of anyone on here who lives in most European or Asian countries. I taught literal middle schoolers who obtained guns illegally. There are youtube videos and tons of online resources which show every aspect of using any gun you could get your hands on. In the time you've spent on this thread alone, you could have learned all this information. You had a bad experience at 20 and 12 years later have made no progress. I'm not just saying this to you because I have seen it on this site quite a bit, but death by firearm in an informed manner is the simplest and most effective way someone can ctb without access to professional euthanasia. Choosing not to do so for whatever reason is fine, but it is learned helplessness to not make the effort to do so and rationalize that you have.

I know you think what you're saying is valid, and it is, it's just not true. You dont have all the pieces to my puzzle. That's far too presumptuous, and I could prove you wrong. But there's no point in wasting my time. Thanks for trying to teach me the lesson... I guess? But I've done the work. But you dont know me, or my circumstances. That's pretty arrogant that you think you do, but, that's your choice. I simply came across the gun at that time. It was spur of the moment. I wasn't aware there was a gun there. Now I know how to get the safety off. I have my reasons for still being alive, and I don't care nor feel the need to explain them to you to prove anything. However if you, or anyone else, is willing to pay for a gun for me, I would graciously accept it; and in a few weeks, would let you watch me use it over videochat so you would know that it didn't just sit there and "go to waste" so to speak.

Searching for a method for 15 years doesn't exactly ring the "seriousness" bell, imo. Seems like this "Craigslist for the Suicidal" site should be exactly what YOU are looking for.

Normally, when I don't like a movie, I get up and leave.

Searching for a method for 15 years doesn't exactly ring the "seriousness" bell, imo. Seems like this "Craigslist for the Suicidal" site should be exactly what YOU are looking for.

Normally, when I don't like a movie, I get up and leave.

K well that's great. But like I said to the last person who couldn't resist getting there "snark" in, I don't care nor feel the need to explain myself to you. Im secure in my reasons. Am I disappointed? Absoolutely. But I know how I got from therre to here without ending my life. You must be super smart to know my reasoning as well. Then again, I don't think arrogance is a virtue either. Also, I did find a creep from Criagslsit who was willing to help me for the longest time. But I kept him on standby for too long unfortunately. But Im glad because he is a freak in disguise. Turns out he was my ups driver and had talked to my mother once on a route. Small, strange sick world. If I feel someone is particularly rude, I'd tell them to go fuck their self, not kill their self. But thanks for the thought.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

You said what you wanted to say. Apparently you kind of like it here, you keep responding.
Locking the thread, it has served it's purpose.