Venting This Deep Indescribable Pain Inside Me

[grisly bear]

Life hurts so fucking much.
How am I supposed to simply endure this intense, unbreakable pain on a daily basis?
I want to scream and free myself from this endless, never-ending pain.
I just want it to stop hurting.
Ahhhhhhh fuck it.
Even my tears feel like razor blades.
Wasn't it said: Enjoy your life while you're young?
It should be: Enjoy your non-existence before you start to exist.
I know it. I know out of firm conviction that I can and will never be happy as long as I exist.
And the mere fact that I will ever have existed hurts.
The pain of my existence is so unimaginably great.
Why do I have to suffer?
Unfortunly, i have to suffer, at least for a little while longer.
And then one day I will be able to go.
And that day will bring me tears of joy and redemption.
And those tears will be just as painful as today's. But at least they won't taste as bitter.
Fuck it...

I know of no other place than this forum where I can vent so extensively and write down my thoughts at the same time.
I am grateful that this forum exists.

 

[CatLvr]

I am so sorry you are hurting like this.

 

[DeadManLiving]

Life is the greatest and most significant cosmic error that heralded and continues to manifest so much suffering and pain it should have never sprung in the first place, and whoever is responsible or whatever phenomenon is responsible for sowing this sociobiological curse should endure eternal hell, and whoever promotes life is either entitled to do so because they have it good and have always been set or have a savior complex where they have to save suicidals on the premise that the suicidal does not have any judgment or insight and can't see things clearly. These people advertise all of the beautiful Things some proposed future might behold without any guarantee, and out of a savior complex try to save a person that is enslaved to life from themselves believing that that person will one day sense a debt of gratitude to the savior in the future when the suicidal can think more rationally. I think it's absurd and I can't imagine your pain but I can only hope that you find your peace and take comfort with fellow suicidals here who understand.

 

[FuneralCry]

I also find existing really painful, personally I only hope for non-existence and will always suffer as long as I exist, it's so terrible and cruel to me how there's all this suffering. But anyway I hope you find peace, I wish you the best.