Venting Thinking of cutting off my testicles

[Proton]

I've been considering it, for years atp.

My body cant tolerate anti androgens, I am on E but had to go off them due to health reasons. My doctors and insurance keep denying me the surgery and telling me to wait and to prove I'm a real woman etc, I already have a bunch of letters from therapists. They basically want me to prove a bunch of bullshit for insurance, like just do the fucking surgery FFS. These dumbasses could atleast schedule it so I'd feel less stressed.

I have considered it in the past which I wish I did, but they probably would've convinced me to go on trt or some shit.

I have3 options
Dangerous - slicing off my balls, cutting them open and removing the testicles and getting rid of them
Medium- injecting alcohol until their damaged enough, go to a urologist and then tell them that I feel pain there, and since they're damaged enough they'll remove them
Safest- take out a loan and just get the surgery done safely. There still needs to be a medical reason though and I'd need to prove it

Lastly, it's not easy to get the orchie, there still needs to be a medical reason for it, and a bunch of other bs. And If I cut them off I could be held indefinitely in a psych ward which isn't a good idea at all. I also could fuck over my parents lives; even though I don't care about them I don't want to damage their life negatively. There's certain reasons for that and I'd rather not list it publicly.

Why am I posting this? Because it's making me suicidal and affecting my daily life.

 

[ilovenewyork]

That has to be the worst idea ever. Why don't you just not? Be patient and let the doctors do their thing

 

[Proton]

That has to be the worst idea ever. Why don't you just not? Be patient and let the doctors do their thing

I don't want to remasculinize

 

[SomewhereNew]

Please don't seriously there's no way you could go through with it mentally and I don't want you to even try

 

[Gangrel]

unless you have the biggest nerves of steel i doubt one can cut their own balls off without extreme pain that will make you regret it for the intense suffering

 

[SomewhereNew]

unless you have the biggest nerves of steel i doubt one can cut their own balls off without extreme pain that will make you regret it for the intense suffering

It's gotta be like sticking a knife into an outlet, except that outlet is a giant mass of nerves

 

[Proton]

It's gotta be like sticking a knife into an outlet, except that outlet is a giant mass of nerves

Pain killers, drugs, local Anaesthesia

 

[fadedghost]

i'm not a surgeon, but i would be worried about infection, long-term pain, accidentally cutting into a vein or artery while doing the procedure, and the possibility of passing out while doing it.

i would go with option 4 if this is something you need to do

there are other countries that do surgeries that are much cheaper, like Thailand. That may be a bad idea, but you could at least research this. Some overseas surgery places more often have deaths and complications. But #1 seems much riskier than option 4.

i support trans rights, but there are people who have the surgeries who can complications and are even more unhappy after. i am so sorry things are so awful, good luck.

 

[ginko0]

Simply don't. If you're not a surgeon you will just damage your body. I understand you're a trans person, and things are going bad nowadays for you guys. But this is a really bad idea.

There must be some other way.

 

[BlueberryDeer]

I know disphoria is a b***h, but please reconsider. It could be serious medical issues for not doing properly.
Struggling with dysphoria is overwhelming but perhaps there is another options to get an orchie in another place.

 

[U. A.]

What the fuck.
If you aren't a surgeon don't even fucking think about it.

 

[48meow53]

If your body rejected spiro, please know there are other options than cutting off your testicles. Please look into DIY hrt for alternative anti androgens.

 

[uzl lover]

dont even try

 

[48meow53]

If your body rejected spiro, please know there are other options than cutting off your testicles. Please look into DIY hrt for alternative anti androgens.

I also completely stopped spiro after 8 months of hrt and am now only on 4mg e/day and my chest is still growing and my t isn't rising, so you only need a small supply of better anti androgens.

 

[nendn]

I suggest you do not have the balls to cut off your balls :) whatever , be well love

 

[JassieDusk]

I remember watching a dude on wpd cut off his testicles due to cancer, he bled out and I can only imagine it was a painful death. The chances of it happening to you are very high. Best case scenario you will end up permanently deformed.
Look into other options, countries, clinics. There must be a better idea than to cut off your organs by yourself.
No, please don't do it

 

[anhedonic_moron]

don't, best to listen to your doctor.

 

[Proton]

Fuck this is so painful

 

[carfemtanyl]

remember that pain when you get kicked in the balls?
now imagine this times a million
not a great idea tbh

 

[fadedghost]

Fuck this is so painful

i hope that doesn't mean you tried to do it

surgery isn't like math, you can't just cut and then things are gone, there's a science that makes it possible and if you lack training, death infection sepsis scaring, it will end up being more expensive than going to thailand for a procedure

Gender reassignment surgery for male-to-female transitions in Thailand is significantly less expensive compared to many Western countries, often costing between $10,000 to $17,300, which is about 60-80% less than prices in the U.S. and Australia. This affordability, along with the availability of experienced surgeons and accredited facilities, makes Thailand a popular destination for these procedures.
placidway.com mtfsurgery.net




placidway.com
https://www.placidway.com › article › 5424 › Male-to-Female-Surgery-in-Thailand-Comprehensive-Gender-Affirming-Treatments-for-American-Tourists

Male-to-Female Surgery in Thailand: Affordable Care

The substantial cost-effectiveness of procedures in Thailand, often 2-4 times less than in the United States, is a key reason many American individuals choose Thailand for their gender transition. Did You Know?

I am not advocating you do that option, but really would avoid thinking that surgery is simple and involves a little slice here and a little slice there and then just some antibiotic ointment... you'll end up paying more in costs from healing in the ER after if you don't bleed out

and it may make other M2F surgeries impossible because of scarring. scarring makes surgeries much harder... don't do it. i know what i'm talking about, if you want other surgeries, you want as little scar tissue as possible.

 

[Proton]

i hope that doesn't mean you tried to do it

surgery isn't like math, you can't just cut and then things are gone, there's a science that makes it possible and if you lack training, death infection sepsis scaring, it will end up being more expensive than going to thailand for a procedure

Gender reassignment surgery for male-to-female transitions in Thailand is significantly less expensive compared to many Western countries, often costing between $10,000 to $17,300, which is about 60-80% less than prices in the U.S. and Australia. This affordability, along with the availability of experienced surgeons and accredited facilities, makes Thailand a popular destination for these procedures.
placidway.com mtfsurgery.net




placidway.com
https://www.placidway.com › article › 5424 › Male-to-Female-Surgery-in-Thailand-Comprehensive-Gender-Affirming-Treatments-for-American-Tourists

Male-to-Female Surgery in Thailand: Affordable Care

The substantial cost-effectiveness of procedures in Thailand, often 2-4 times less than in the United States, is a key reason many American individuals choose Thailand for their gender transition. Did You Know?

I am not advocating you do that option, but really would avoid thinking that surgery is simple and involves a little slice here and a little slice there and then just some antibiotic ointment... you'll end up paying more in costs from healing in the ER after if you don't bleed out

and it may make other M2F surgeries impossible because of scarring. scarring makes surgeries much harder... don't do it. i know what i'm talking about, if you want other surgeries, you want as little scar tissue as possible.

I can't leave this shithole otherwise I would've already done it: the sad reality is most hospitals keep rejecting me for the surgery saying it's not medically necessary or spouting since it's all insurance based and need to prove a bunch of bs

My only hope is a private clinic, I have lab documentation and a letter but so many places won't accept jt for whatever fuckass reason. It shouldn't be this hard to get your balls removed

 

[Alcoholic Teletubby]

What about tucking undies?

 

[Proton]

What about tucking undies?

The source is that they produce testosterone and that distresses me tbh

 

[Alcoholic Teletubby]

The source is that they produce testosterone and that distresses me tbh

...put your willy on ice./j

But srs, I'm sorry you're having to endure that. I wish there were an off-topic sub that helped ppl source meds from underground sources. I mean, if we can find SN, we should be able to find anti-androgens.

 

[Proton]

...put your willy on ice./j

But srs, I'm sorry you're having to endure that. I wish there were an off-topic sub that helped ppl source meds from underground sources. I mean, if we can find SN, we should be able to find anti-androgens.

I can't take anti androgen pills

 

[Ilovemyteddies]

I have seen DIY surgery done, and have heard from a few people who have done it (both mtf and ftm), please please please please don't do it, it never goes well as far as I know, I understand the desperation level is high (obviously, I mean you're considering DIY surgery after all) but there really is no option other than with professional surgeons. Also, what are the medical reasons you can't take E or anti-androgens if you don't mind sharing? Could you take something like a GnRHa?