They're gonna make me suffer for a year.

[Ednospatient]

So as you might know, I live in a care home and the staff took my SN. I discussed with them and they said if my condition hasn't improved in a year, they MIGHT consider giving me the package (it's my property after all)

So I'll have to suffer for a year before I have a chance of ctb'ing.. thankfully the SN doesn't expire in that time.

 

[quediuqueque]

Do they know what sn is for?

 

[DrownFeather]

Sorry for your struggles but how can they tell you after year if not improved they will give it to you? Is not that assisted ctb?

 

[Ednospatient]

Sorry for your struggles but how can they tell you after year if not improved they will give it to you? Is not that assisted ctb?

I said they MIGHT give me the package. I have doubts. But what else are they going to do if my illness turns out to be incurable and no pills help?

and the package is technically mine, it has my name on it so they will need to give it to me sooner or later

 

[DrownFeather]

I said they MIGHT give me the package. I have doubts. But what else are they going to do if my illness turns out to be incurable and no pills help?

Well year is long time and they sense you might ctb in any moment so they try delay as much as possible and give you feel of able to relief after year which will make you able to cope with struggling for the current time

 

[lostmylove]

They won't give you it. They have a duty of care. If they give you it and you die it will reflect badly on them. You can't order to there you'll have to get it ordered to somewhere else. They've most likely destroyed it anyway
. Also if you're in a care home someone is being paid for you to continue being there. Cynical but that's realistic

 

[downndone2]

Does the staff know it is SN? If so, giving it to you would not be ethical. Healthcare professionals also must intervene if they know you're suicidal

 

[Ednospatient]

They won't give you it. They have a duty of care. If they give you it and you die it will reflect badly on them. You can't order to there you'll have to get it ordered to somewhere else. They've most likely destroyed it anyway
. Also if you're in a care home someone is being paid for you to continue being there. Cynical but that's realistic

I don't think they can destroy it, it has my name on it so destroying it would be a crime.

 

[FuneralCry]

Nobody should have to suffer against their wishes, we all deserve the option of a way to exit this world. It seems as though many people do not respect the right to die. I'm sorry that you are going through this. I hope you find relief from pain in whatever happens.

 

[Ednospatient]

As I expected "we can give you the package but we would have to call the psych ward"

 

[wljourney]

Write off the package. They will not give it back to you as they know it would be used to self harm.

You are now likely also on closer watch for suicidal ideation.

I'm afraid it will take a few weeks/months of "good behaviour" until they stop watching you too closely and you can arrange for another option/plan B.

I'm really sorry. Truly.
Living in a care home is brutal and I don't wish it on my worst enemy. My heart goes out to you.

 

[Endtimes1]

Is there any reasonable reason to believe you will get better?

 

[Ednospatient]

Is there any reasonable reason to believe you will get better?

Well I throw up almost daily and I can't make it stop, doctors are clueless and pills don't work

 

[LookieLou]

So as you might know, I live in a care home and the staff took my SN. I discussed with them and they said if my condition hasn't improved in a year, they MIGHT consider giving me the package (it's my property after all)

So I'll have to suffer for a year before I have a chance of ctb'ing.. thankfully the SN doesn't expire in that time.

Why not stop eating and drinking? Nursing homes generally accept and it's not a bad way to go.

 

[Endtimes1]

Well I throw up almost daily and I can't make it stop, doctors are clueless and pills don't work

I'm not a doctor and this is no medical advice. But have you ever tried a few days fast and after it starting to eat very slowly again and see if it gets better?

 

[Freedomindeath4me]

I'm sorry but I don't think it's going to be possible to commit suicide in the care home. Is there any way you can leave it?

 

[Ednospatient]

Turns out you guys were right, they can't give it to me. So now I will have to use painful or violent methods. I'm thinking of going with a paracetamol overdose (yes, I know it hurts)

 

[Kurinoy]

Turns out you guys were right, they can't give it to me. So now I will have to use painful or violent methods. I'm thinking of going with a paracetamol overdose (yes, I know it hurts)

You gonna need a lot of paracetamol.

 

[Ednospatient]

You gonna need a lot of paracetamol.

I wish I could get amitripyline, but I can't

 

[Kurinoy]

I wish I could get amitripyline, but I can't

Pills never worked for me...

 

[symphony]

I'm sorry OP. Wish there was more I could do to be of support.

 

[8AEM]

I am so sorry. People have no right to dictate what happens to you and your body.

Why not stop eating and drinking? Nursing homes generally accept and it's not a bad way to go.

I'm no expert on nursing homes, but can't they just tube feed OP?

 

[Shu]

As I expected "we can give you the package but we would have to call the psych ward"

That's odd because they have no idea what you are using it for.

So as you might know, I live in a care home and the staff took my SN. I discussed with them and they said if my condition hasn't improved in a year, they MIGHT consider giving me the package (it's my property after all)

So I'll have to suffer for a year before I have a chance of ctb'ing.. thankfully the SN doesn't expire in that time.

Wait.. this makes no sense to me.. what does your condition have to do with them giving you your package?

 

[Judy Garland]

I don't think they can destroy it, it has my name on it so destroying it would be a crime.

I told you this a week ago when they first took it from you. They can destroy it, and they will destroy it. I used to work in a group home as a counselor. I wouldn't doubt that they've already written a case note, sent emails, or made calls to your doctors/psychologist about this. There is no explanation that you can give that will make them give you your package. They know what you want it for, and that's it. It will be destroyed. Not trying to sound harsh, but it's the truth.

 

[Cathy Ames]

I still don't understand why they are not continuing to look for the cause of this horrible thing! And I don't understand why they haven't offered you a J-tube or PEG-tube. Essentially they are torturing you!

 

[dearlybeloved998]

So as you might know, I live in a care home and the staff took my SN. I discussed with them and they said if my condition hasn't improved in a year, they MIGHT consider giving me the package (it's my property after all)

So I'll have to suffer for a year before I have a chance of ctb'ing.. thankfully the SN doesn't expire in that time.

What are you in the care home for? Is it like an eating disorder program, or a long term hospital of sorts? Take care.
Doctors literally have too much control over patients.

 

[WanderingWater]

I told you this a week ago when they first took it from you. They can destroy it, and they will destroy it. I used to work in a group home as a counselor. I wouldn't doubt that they've already written a case note, sent emails, or made calls to your doctors/psychologist about this. There is no explanation that you can give that will make them give you your package. They know what you want it for, and that's it. It will be destroyed. Not trying to sound harsh, but it's the truth.

Thank you for being on point!

 

[wljourney]

I told you this a week ago when they first took it from you. They can destroy it, and they will destroy it. I used to work in a group home as a counselor. I wouldn't doubt that they've already written a case note, sent emails, or made calls to your doctors/psychologist about this. There is no explanation that you can give that will make them give you your package. They know what you want it for, and that's it. It will be destroyed. Not trying to sound harsh, but it's the truth.

Listen to Judy. She is unfortunately right.
And whatever you do next: remember that they may from now on open any packages mailed to you to make sure you aren't ordering "contraband".

I'm really, truly sorry.

 

[wljourney]

I still don't understand why they are not continuing to look for the cause of this horrible thing! And I don't understand why they haven't offered you a J-tube or PEG-tube. Essentially they are torturing you!

I guess they are still trying to figure out what's wrong. I mean… how many years have we all spent getting diagnosis from doctors only to have another claim "naw it's THIS" and then a third say "no way, it's THAT"…

And the only one who suffers through it all is the patient.

Doctors go home to their families and don't have skin in the game.

(And yes, "not all doctors are the same" and yes, they are heroes for saving lives during the pandemic and otherwise too, but let's be clear: not all doctors are heroes. In fact many aren't.)

 

[Cathy Ames]

I guess they are still trying to figure out what's wrong.

ARE they? My assumption is they slapped on the EDNOS label and called it a day. Once your problems are laid on a DSMV diagnosis, they generally stop looking for medical/physical causes.