Failedtime

Failedtime

New Member
Dec 11, 2023
4
This bridge is tall. A famous poet died by jumping off it. Recently another person as well.

After her death there was a movement to put a net or something but the local place petitioned against it because of cost & aesthetics. I think it would be romantic. I could dance as I'm falling into the water. It could be beautiful, frightening, permament. Maybe less than I'd like but still... Think of the drama.

Last time I was there and reaching out into the nothing, too scared to plummet but fantasizing cops pulled up. 4 of them, two cars & called me their buddy.

I refused to talk to them. I said I didn't want to talk about my day. They shared I'm being momentarily detained and I persisted in saying, "I don't want to talk to you." they finally ditched. I cried the way home
.

Halloween is an important day to me. I always wanted to properly celebrate it... Do something fun. Camp. Frightening & embrace the harvest & grief of it. Maybe this could be that, right?

I'd love to be gassed up for this. Encouragement.

Life is disappointment. It's suffering. I'm 37 & my rocket never launched. I'm dissapointed & i'm tired of trying. I don't want to be here through the next election. I'm queer, unemployed, on disability & utterly alone even when there are people who love me around.

There's a local haunted house I'm going to. After that maybe I can lyft to the bridge and go for a short walk. Thanks for reading. Hopefully I won't be back, right?
 
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Mari&mewo

Mari&mewo

Member
Feb 11, 2023
21
I know you can help people while you are around. I don't have all the words tonight but I hope you have the best Halloween.
 
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Failedtime

Failedtime

New Member
Dec 11, 2023
4
the only other comment just spammed emoji's- sorry I don't have more words to offer 🍓
You're very kind. I apologize for my unkind response.

I had wanted to be encouraged to take this step. I'm sorry for having not expressed more gratitude. Thank you for your kindness and your thoughtful response. I genuinely wish you well.
 
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