Discussion Their lives after you CTB?

[UselessBeing]

I use to often think of how my friends and families life would be after I ctb. I use to worry it would cause my loved ones pain and suffering. But as the years go on and the people around me show their true colors I've come to realize that... Maybe at first it would be a shock. And maybe a few people would mourn. Mostly my parent's. I grew up with a mentally ill mother which lead her to be highly abusive. I've learned that's just who my mom is and even though she's told me to end my life before I worry for the guilt she may feel and the heartbreak I'll leave for my dad. But logically I don't think they will mourn long. Honestly I know their lives would improve 100x when I'm gone.

I think for my brother it'll be a breath of fresh air and relief. He has made it known from early on what a burden I have been in his life and how much he and his wife despise me. I truly believe my husband will come to find peace with it and be free from any obligation to me and live out a wonderful life. I see it being rough for everyone but hardly for long at all. I know their lives would improve by this. And I'm sorry if that doesn't sound great to say. I want my suffering to end and for everyone else to thrive off it.

What about everyone else? How do you see life being for the people around you if you ever depart?

 

[Mr2005]

They join SS

 

[Anonymous_A]

I just keep telling myself "I'll sort all that stuff out once I finally ctb'" lol

But srs, no point wandering about it. Well, the end conclusion of such thoughts ends in, you worry too much about those who are left behind and you stay/ don't ctb. Or you ctb and let whoever is left behind, behind. They'll deal with grief them self. The same way we all cope with our own battles, in our own way

 

[butterflycollector]

unfortunately when i die i know for a fact my mom and my close online friends will be crushed by it. i feel very terrible about leaving any of them behind. i know ill probably really do it someday, but i know when i do my mom could honestly not want to live either because of me being gone. my friends will keep living, but ill probably cause them to have a lot of pain, ive known some of them closely for over 7 years so far.

 

[UselessBeing]

I just keep telling myself "I'll sort all that stuff out once I finally ctb'" lol

But srs, no point wandering about it. Well, the end conclusion of such thoughts ends in, you worry too much about those who are left behind and you stay/ don't ctb. Or you ctb and let whoever is left behind, behind. They'll deal with grief them self. The same way we all cope with our own battles, in our own way

I know I shouldn't worry about it due to the delays it will cause. My mind runs a mile a minute so it's hard to NOT think of that sometimes. But I should start training myself to snap out of it. It really is pointless in the end.

unfortunately when i die i know for a fact my mom and my close online friends will be crushed by it. i feel very terrible about leaving any of them behind. i know ill probably really do it someday, but i know when i do my mom could honestly not want to live either because of me being gone. my friends will keep living, but ill probably cause them to have a lot of pain, ive known some of them closely for over 7 years so far.

I know how the feeling is and how life goes. But I hope you still have many happy moments with your loved ones and can have genuine smiles<3

 

[OnlyTheWind]

It will be super shocking that I actually did it, but when I think of how my life is a prison 24/7, I stop caring about what anyone will feel. They will get over it in time. I won't.

 

[OrcWitch]

I think my internet friends would be in shock because I'm pretty private with this. They would also feel a deep sadness and worry if they could have said anything or treated me a certain way to have prevented it. That is naturally just how people feel. I would want to minimize that with whatever suicide note I leave in my bio and hope their grief ends quickly. They have all been good to me and deserve good lives.

I think my dad would be traumatized, as I'm his only child and he already feels a lot of regret towards how I grew up. I have been no contact with my half sister and my mom for 6 years so they wouldn't hear about it. She abused my dad(and the rest of us) so I doubt he would contact her to say I'm dead.

 

[BottomlessPit]

I usually never really care about that, but now as I'm approaching my potential ctb date I can't help but worry about my family. I try to remind myself that from the perspective of nonexistence, the world doesn't exist. Hell could break loose after my death and I wouldn't even notice.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I am turning apathetic about this. Nobody around me ever stops to think how their behaviour affects me, and they care nothing for my life, so why should I care about their lives? Oh yes I should totally be mindful of people who take advantage of, and then ignore me when it is no longer convenient! So they will be hurt... and? They will get to experience just a small taste of what they have inflicted on me over a lifetime. Their "pain" will not even be real anyway, it will be nothing more than a display to gain clout; before going back to being mean-spirited toward each other

 

[rosie93]

I use to often think of how my friends and families life would be after I ctb. I use to worry it would cause my loved ones pain and suffering. But as the years go on and the people around me show their true colors I've come to realize that... Maybe at first it would be a shock. And maybe a few people would mourn. Mostly my parent's. I grew up with a mentally ill mother which lead her to be highly abusive. I've learned that's just who my mom is and even though she's told me to end my life before I worry for the guilt she may feel and the heartbreak I'll leave for my dad. But logically I don't think they will mourn long. Honestly I know their lives would improve 100x when I'm gone.

I think for my brother it'll be a breath of fresh air and relief. He has made it known from early on what a burden I have been in his life and how much he and his wife despise me. I truly believe my husband will come to find peace with it and be free from any obligation to me and live out a wonderful life. I see it being rough for everyone but hardly for long at all. I know their lives would improve by this. And I'm sorry if that doesn't sound great to say. I want my suffering to end and for everyone else to thrive off it.

What about everyone else? How do you see life being for the people around you if you ever depart?

Yes. Everyone's life will be better off without me too.

 

[Morbid Cam]

For me personally I've watched my family and friends over the years and seen their reactions to loved ones who die and how they are at funerals. What basically seems to happen is that people get sad for a little bit (especially after initially finding out) but after the funeral they kind of snap back to who they were. Not to say they aren't sad that the person is gone but just that they continue on with their lives. So I'm personally not too worried about the people I would be leaving behind.

 

[Chiisai]

I didnt care before and had a flurry of attempts. But now that its been almost half a year, I find myself not wanting to CTB in my own room because I cannot take the guilt of having to burden my family with trauma. I wish I could just have one last ride around the countryside and just CTB where I will run out of gas, just slumping on my bike with my written will in my jacket.

 

[orangepotato]

They'll be sad, but you know what? Too bad. I love them and all, but I never consented to this shit-show we call life. It's completely within my rights to end my life whenever I want. They'll get over it eventually.

 

[siray]

I can't even imagine how much suffering you must be in to have such empathetic thoughts for your loved ones. But it's certainly true that within 5 years, the intensity of grief may reduce, making their daily lives less painful.

Being made aware that my brother despises me would induce in me great pain, I would immediately get away from him and move to another city.

I wish you peace in whatever decision you make for your life, you're certainly in a conflict-trodden state.

 

[FuneralCry]

My family members would be sad, as I see suicide is a pain cycle, to end our own it passes it on to other people. I do think that they can live perfectly fine without me though, even know it will be hard at first for them. However I guess it is not my concern as I will no longer be existing at that point. I never asked for this life in this first place so it isn't as though I have any obligation to stay alive.

 

[UselessBeing]

I think my internet friends would be in shock because I'm pretty private with this. They would also feel a deep sadness and worry if they could have said anything or treated me a certain way to have prevented it. That is naturally just how people feel. I would want to minimize that with whatever suicide note I leave in my bio and hope their grief ends quickly. They have all been good to me and deserve good lives.

I think my dad would be traumatized, as I'm his only child and he already feels a lot of regret towards how I grew up. I have been no contact with my half sister and my mom for 6 years so they wouldn't hear about it. She abused my dad(and the rest of us) so I doubt he would contact her to say I'm dead.

You deserved so much better than that situation. I'm so sorry. Until whatever ending we figure out, I hope until then you are able to still have some moments of happiness.

I usually never really care about that, but now as I'm approaching my potential ctb date I can't help but worry about my family. I try to remind myself that from the perspective of nonexistence, the world doesn't exist. Hell could break loose after my death and I wouldn't even notice.

Much love to you friend. I hope peace is found somehow <3

I am turning apathetic about this. Nobody around me ever stops to think how their behaviour affects me, and they care nothing for my life, so why should I care about their lives? Oh yes I should totally be mindful of people who take advantage of, and then ignore me when it is no longer convenient! So they will be hurt... and? They will get to experience just a small taste of what they have inflicted on me over a lifetime. Their "pain" will not even be real anyway, it will be nothing more than a display to gain clout; before going back to being mean-spirited toward each other

I know of people like this. Fuck em all. I'm so sorry.

I didnt care before and had a flurry of attempts. But now that its been almost half a year, I find myself not wanting to CTB in my own room because I cannot take the guilt of having to burden my family with trauma. I wish I could just have one last ride around the countryside and just CTB where I will run out of gas, just slumping on my bike with my written will in my jacket.

I honestly feel this. the thought of being found in my own home makes me feel kinda bad. I hope things work out however it is you're hoping for. <3

I can't even imagine how much suffering you must be in to have such empathetic thoughts for your loved ones. But it's certainly true that within 5 years, the intensity of grief may reduce, making their daily lives less painful.

Being made aware that my brother despises me would induce in me great pain, I would immediately get away from him and move to another city.

I wish you peace in whatever decision you make for your life, you're certainly in a conflict-trodden state.

My family has hurt me beyond belief. I've lived through years of abuse and anger and realized at this point this is just how life is. And it wouldn't have been this way if I wasn't in the picture. It's my parent's fault for having me that's for sure. But in the end... I just want everyone happy even though I'm not,.

My brother and I were all we had growing up. We leaned on each other. And finding out by his own words how much he hates me has sent me off the deep end. And honestly believe it will contribute to how soon I ctb. I'm sick of this suffering and life. I'm not happy here and will never find peace living. I pray others can live without feeling this way.

 

[CatTheBus5689]

There will be a lot of shock for sure, but ultimately they will all move on. I'm only deeply rooted to my parents lives, they will be getting the brunt of the trauma. For once I am grateful I am not a big part of peoples lives, my passing will be just that more quiet for it.

As for the rest they will probably live with the guilt of failing notice or not being enough to save me. As much as I hate to dump this burden on a lot of people I care about it's just something that is inevitable when it comes to ctb. I failed to move on from the past, they won't.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

Friends will move on rapidly. Will be tougher for family especially parents or even worse children

 

[Addi_Madd]

My closest loved ones (immediate family and closest dearest friends) will grieve but they'll get over it. They all have significant people in their lives for support and at least one person who they love more than they love me, ie a spouse or partner or child etc. I'm not the most important person in anybody's lives.

The majority of people, friends and family I'm less close to, co workers and acquaintances, will say "oh that's sad" when they hear, and do the sad face or hug reaction on Facebook posts saying I'm dead but my death will not affect them for longer than a few minutes when they first hear about it.

A very small number of people will be pleased to know I'm dead as they think I'm a loser and waste of life and deserve to have been so unhappy.

 

[PSYCHO_METAL_X]

I dont care

 

[apathetic.]

hmm well that would be a shock because my parents aren't aware that their abuse could have consequences.

Especially my mother she thinks I'll turn out to be a successful human being despite her tearing me down everyday so yeah I'm sure it's gonna be chaotic. They would be sad because they are Gonna loose their slave Lol

 

[Bleunoir]

No one cares about me so I don't feel it will affect them. My parents are extremely cold and cynical people. My father will just say: pity but that's life.
I haven't experienced any act of kindness from my husband in the last years and my 12 year old daughter kind of dislikes me because that's the pattern of behavior she gets from her father.
Everyone will be just better off without me.

 

[Bleunoir]

I think the only person affected will be my daughter . I asked my husband once if he will be totally surprised if I suicide one day but he just yelled at me. He pretends there's no problem eben though I have been crying for help for so long. Sometimes I feel that a simple act of kindness can save a life but in my case that act never comes .
If I die my father will just shrug his shoulder and say : what a pity but that's life. That's kind of family I have. No one to live for.

 

[squidgirl]

i know that even if i don't go through with my plan, i'm going to ctb eventually. it's just how it's gonna be, there's no getting around it. so there isn't much of a reason to not do it now.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

I think everyone is gonna be just fine. Which is something that I want. I don't need or want anyone feeling devastated. I don't want anyone to suffer bc of me

 

[empty]

My parents would be really upset, but I don't think my death would have a huge impact on anyone else.