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The Great Below

The Great Below

Fragile, she doesn't see her beauty šŸ„€
May 19, 2022
11
I have to be an adult I have kids and pets I wrote all of these lists because I need to get all of these things done since I've been in bed for 3 days and I haven't showered or changed I've just cried and I've tried to do some work calls in between crying I'm just really not well I can't stop thinking about wanting to kill myself about just wanting it to end I have to drive my car to the store and it keeps thinking about killing myself my new car that I got because I crushed my last one because I wanted to die and I can't talk to my husband because he's not a real husband he's not a nice person he would use it against me he uses everything against me and I'm just I'm just getting really overwhelmed I just wish I had it not died the first time and now I have this car payment you know people are probably going to talk to me about this new car and I don't even want to acknowledge it I want to pretend like it didn't happen I'm so scared I'm so scared I just wish I had someone to love me I feel like I don't have any reason to live and it's so scary I just don't know how to protect myself from myself I don't have any friends or anyone that I can turn to I don't have anything I have nothing I have no one I just wish I I killed myself already I wish it had already happened I feel like it's too late for me to do it now I have to be alive to take care of everybody take care of my kids I don't get to die anymore and I'm just so upset about it I'm so heartbroken about it I just want to be at peace I just I just want to be at peace
 
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