The survival instinct

[Butterflyfree]

People talk about it a lot and you don't realize how strong it is until you realize how strong it is. It makes a person who's been given the gift to get themselves and their beloved pets out of this place to keep looking for possible solutions to not have to go just yet, when staying is just going to cause more suffering and come to the same end anyway. It makes no rational sense to stay, it makes no rational sense to keep trying to find a way to stay. But then SI isn't rational is it? I have a friend who's dying of breast cancer that's spread all through her body. She's in so much pain and has the legal means to end her life. She lives in a state where she was approved for a medically assisted suicide and she has the meds to do it all she has to do is take them and her suffering is over. Yet she still clings to the remaining days left of her life, she still hangs on in terrible agony drowning in her own lungs knowing the end is coming soon. It makes no sense to me. But that's SI for you. What can overcome the SI and make us stop struggling enough against it just to let go? My God it's like swimming upstream, it's like drowning and reaching for a life raft that's not even there. Nothing can save you. The SI is just an illusion, it's a cruel bitch that whispers to you, that tries to trick you into staying or trying to find a way to stay longer when you will just have greater suffering and agony along the way to only get to the point where you are now? Facing death. It comes for us no matter what we do. If given a peaceful quick way out only a fool would not take it. How do we not fear the reaper?

 

[Snake of Eden]

It is our most powerful drive afterall

 

[Butterflyfree]

But if someone on their deathbed, already dying very soon suffering and wasting away eaten up with cancer can't even let go and take the legal meds they have prescribed to them to stop the suffering how is there any hope for the rest of us to overcome it?

 

[AnonymousS]

People talk about it a lot and you don't realize how strong it is until you realize how strong it is. It makes a person who's been given the gift to get themselves and their beloved pets out of this place to keep looking for possible solutions to not have to go just yet, when staying is just going to cause more suffering and come to the same end anyway. It makes no rational sense to stay, it makes no rational sense to keep trying to find a way to stay. But then SI isn't rational is it? I have a friend who's dying of breast cancer that's spread all through her body. She's in so much pain and has the legal means to end her life. She lives in a state where she was approved for a medically assisted suicide and she has the meds to do it all she has to do is take them and her suffering is over. Yet she still clings to the remaining days left of her life, she still hangs on in terrible agony drowning in her own lungs knowing the end is coming soon. It makes no sense to me. But that's SI for you. What can overcome the SI and make us stop struggling enough against it just to let go? My God it's like swimming upstream, it's like drowning and reaching for a life raft that's not even there. Nothing can save you. The SI is just an illusion, it's a cruel bitch that whispers to you, that tries to trick you into staying or trying to find a way to stay longer when you will just have greater suffering and agony along the way to only get to the point where you are now? Facing death. It comes for us no matter what we do. If given a peaceful quick way out only a fool would not take it. How do we not fear the reaper?

Yes it's wired very strong into our system, an unconscious but powerful thing. Yet it can be suppressed using different methods.

But if someone on their deathbed, already dying very soon suffering and wasting away eaten up with cancer can't even let go and take the legal meds they have prescribed to them to stop the suffering how is there any hope for the rest of us to overcome it?

That's just one person though, many have tragically had to go out in various gruesome ways. It's unfair to all of us, but some of us have to make a choice.

 

[FuneralCry]

It is difficult to ctb as even know we may want to die, we are programmed to survive. It is the way we have evolved. If it was easier to leave this world, I would already be gone. If only there was an option to just disappear. I believe that I will eventually reach a point of desperation and then I will be able to exit this world.

 

[bed]

For me, I think the only way to get over SI (somewhat anyway) is through impulse. Every other attempt has been impulsive and I always regret not being able to go through with it. I believe I am being rational in wanting to die but my brain does not care, it prevents me at the last step, every time. The only way I can see myself CTB is just downing SN or N without thinking about it and let SI kick in when I'm somewhere I can't be saved. Benzos will help but I still think it won't be enough to fully stop my brain from knowing what is happening.

 

[Tempest]

I didn't feel SI too strongly when I attempted a few days ago using the NN/compression method. Just tightened the strap as I was lying down, unfortunately I couldn't find the carotids so nothing happened besides a headache. I felt the strong urge to die that night despite my nitrogen hose being on the way. Since then I found the forum and now I'm nervous that SI will kick in just because I've read so much about it. Maybe this shows that to overcome SI you have to just not think too much, or maybe you need to wait until you feel ready rather than setting a date.

 

[Butterflyfree]

@AnonymousS how can it be suppressed? What methods?

I didn't feel SI too strongly when I attempted a few days ago using the NN/compression method. Just tightened the strap as I was lying down, unfortunately I couldn't find the carotids so nothing happened besides a headache. I felt the strong urge to die that night despite my nitrogen hose being on the way. Since then I found the forum and now I'm nervous that SI will kick in just because I've read so much about it. Maybe this shows that to overcome SI you have to just not think too much, or maybe you need to wait until you feel ready rather than setting a date.

@Tempest some of us don't have a choice but to set a date.

 

[Tempest]

I understand, I'm just pointing out that it might be a contributing factor for SI in some people.

 

[AnonymousS]

It is difficult to ctb as even know we may want to die, we are programmed to survive. It is the way we have evolved. If it was easier to leave this world, I would already be gone. If only there was an option to just disappear. I believe that I will eventually reach a point of desperation and then I will be able to exit this world.

I hope when it comes that you go peacefully.

@AnonymousS how can it be suppressed? What methods?

@Tempest some of us don't have a choice but to set a date.

Essentially like people have been advising me, certain mindsets. Alcohol or other CNS depressants can help. Anything that may cause drowsiness, however you need to make sure everything is right regarding the method first.

 

[lonerclown666]

i feel that i can die know i just want to know what happen next after dying if there is after life or not or what nothingness truly is

 

[Snake of Eden]

i feel that i can die know i just want to know what happen next after dying if there is after life or not or what nothingness truly is

Sadly we will never know that while alive