Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Morning everyone
 
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XYZ

XYZ

I just can’t get these damn wrists to bleed
Jul 22, 2020
800
Meh, another shitty day. How're you?

Same here. Going through the drudgery of everyday life. At least I did not cry on my way home from work. That a "victory" of some sort, I guess he he he.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Ugghh hurry up group and my psychiatrist. I wanna go home and lay in bed!
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
Same here. Going through the drudgery of everyday life. At least I did not cry on my way home from work. That a "victory" of some sort, I guess he he he.
I've found myself doing that alot lately. It's a new behavior for me and it's somewhat confusing as to why it started.

Ugghh hurry up group and my psychiatrist. I wanna go home and lay in bed!
That's exactly what I'm saying about work right now heh.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
I've found myself doing that alot lately. It's a new behavior for me and it's somewhat confusing as to why it started.


That's exactly what I'm saying about work right now heh.
So my therapist in my IOP program is talking about discharge for me and my BPD is acting up. I don't wanna discharge. I grew too attached to the staff and psychiatrist and to not see them 3 days a week makes me upset :( fuck BPD
 
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XYZ

XYZ

I just can’t get these damn wrists to bleed
Jul 22, 2020
800
I've found myself doing that alot lately. It's a new behavior for me and it's somewhat confusing as to why it started.

In my case it's a combination of reacting to stress and also feeling insecure to the point that every day is a struggle for survival. I always thought I'd get my shit together by the time I'm 40... nope, didn't happen.
 
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Sensei

Sensei

剣道家
Nov 4, 2019
6,336
Same here. Going through the drudgery of everyday life. At least I did not cry on my way home from work. That a "victory" of some sort, I guess he he he.

That is a victory. You have to start somewhere.
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
That is a victory. You have to start somewhere.
Very true, hence the term "small victory."

There's a nice purple, pink, orange, yellow sunset thing going on outside my window. My camera can't begin to capture it, but it's pretty mellow to watch right now.

20201002 185841
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I'm on facebook right now. My replies seem bland an inconsequential. I can't say what I think. So I'm on here too and even here I feel like I'm in the margins. I feel like I'm vanishing down the cracks in the world. Even so, I can't help but feel I actually don't want to identify with everyone else. My arrogance is coming out; maybe everyone else should just catch the fuck up and get with the game. Or maybe I'm just being a twat. Sorry, just how I feel. Don't we all feel like that sometimes?
 
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XYZ

XYZ

I just can’t get these damn wrists to bleed
Jul 22, 2020
800
I can't say what I think

I am unsure of my own thoughts, they are all jumbled up, so trying to express them in a coherent fashion really is a futile enterprise.
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I am unsure of my own thoughts, they are all jumbled up, so trying to express them in a coherent fashion really is a futile enterprise.
Aw mate, I'm sorry to hear that. I'm sure of my thoughts, but my thoughts are conflicted (if that makes sense). I follow you though and i think you express yourself well.
 
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XYZ

XYZ

I just can’t get these damn wrists to bleed
Jul 22, 2020
800
Aw mate, I'm sorry to hear that. I'm sure of my thoughts, but my thoughts are conflicted (if that makes sense). I follow you though and i think you express yourself well.

Thx Underscore, you always bring so much kindness to every thread. That's your super power:heart:

I am glad you follow my line of thought, but that's coz I keep it short. You wouldn't wanna get lost in the pages of my dark mind, let me tell you that... he he he. You'd never find your way out.
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
You'd never find your way out.
Hahahaha me neither! For all that I write too much on here sometimes, it's still a fraction of what I wish i could say. My mind is a strange pit of confusion and contradiction. The weird thing is... I find that acceptable and reasonable. I tend to think that if life doesn't confuse the fuck out of you then you are either not doing it properly or you are a bit thick.
 
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Marchioness

Marchioness

Eternal sleep
Feb 17, 2020
296
Had a relative die from covid recently, it's putting my brain in a funk
I apologize that I'm not on here more to see what everyone's doing. Sometimes I wish I could live in a cabin off the grid, away from everyone.
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
I'm on facebook right now. My replies seem bland an inconsequential. I can't say what I think. So I'm on here too and even here I feel like I'm in the margins. I feel like I'm vanishing down the cracks in the world. Even so, I can't help but feel I actually don't want to identify with everyone else. My arrogance is coming out; maybe everyone else should just catch the fuck up and get with the game. Or maybe I'm just being a twat. Sorry, just how I feel. Don't we all feel like that sometimes?
FB in general is bland and inconsequential :))

Had a relative die from covid recently, it's putting my brain in a funk
I apologize that I'm not on here more to see what everyone's doing. Sometimes I wish I could live in a cabin off the grid, away from everyone.
I'm so sorry for your loss. No need to apologize for being inactive. We're here for ya anytime!
 
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Sensei

Sensei

剣道家
Nov 4, 2019
6,336
Sensei is up early in the morning on a Sunday for once. Well, early by Sensei's standards. Result: Sensei gets morning terrors. Conclusion: Sensei shouldn't get up early in the morning.
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
Had a relative die from covid recently, it's putting my brain in a funk
I apologize that I'm not on here more to see what everyone's doing. Sometimes I wish I could live in a cabin off the grid, away from everyone.
Sorry to hear of your loss. My aunt died of the virus and my uncle was not far behind (though not sure what caused it).
I too often want that log cabin away from everyone. LOL though with good internet ofc!
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Morning everyone. Wishing I could be hit by a meteor today. I had a dream last night where I hung myself
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
Spent the morning beating the shit out of my roommates with larp weapons and practicing archery. Good way to let off some steam, still trying to figure out what to get into after work.

20200930 131903
 
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Brick In The Wall

Brick In The Wall

2M Or Not 2B.
Oct 30, 2019
25,158
The ebb and flow of life, can be especially hard here.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Morning everyone. Feeling kinda like shit today
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
Morning everyone. Feeling kinda like shit today
Aw I'm sorry Squiddy. I hope the feeling passes as much as it may.
Spent the morning beating the shit out of my roommates with larp weapons and practicing archery. Good way to let off some steam, still trying to figure out what to get into after work.

View attachment 46520
That looks like fun. I used to do field archery when I was young. Everyone should know how to use a bow!
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Aw I'm sorry Squiddy. I hope the feeling passes as much as it may.

That looks like fun. I used to do field archery when I was young. Everyone should know how to use a bow!
I might go pick up my one of my meds from the pharmacy and get some Burger King on the way home
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I want a damn burger now. Haven't had one in years. Bloody healthy food. Why is everything that is bad for you so much fun?
 
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