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doublecupj

Member
Jul 12, 2022
42
One of the things I have always struggled with when it comes to ctb is the "what if?" thing.

Oh what if things improve?
What if I miss out on X?
What if this bad thing doesn't actually happen?
And so on.

That's been one of the primary drivers keeping me alive.

But then one day I started flipping it around and I asked myself:

"What if I had died at the end of 2012?"

2012 was a pretty decent year for me, one of the last good ones I can remember. And honestly, had I died in December of that year, I think I would be just fine with that. There isn't really anything past that time that I would have kicked myself for missing out on, and in fact, there's a whole bunch of suffering and BS I would have completely avoided.

Just thought I would share that mind trick.
 
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Reactions: F@#$, letmegetout, silent.desperation and 3 others
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
46,743
The fact that nobody can suffer from not existing is exactly why the thought of ceasing to exist comforts me, no matter what in my case I'd see it as better to not exist.
 
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Reactions: silent.desperation
Slow_Farewell

Slow_Farewell

Warlock
Dec 19, 2023
709
One of the things I have always struggled with when it comes to ctb is the "what if?" thing.

Oh what if things improve?
What if I miss out on X?
What if this bad thing doesn't actually happen?
And so on.

That's been one of the primary drivers keeping me alive.

But then one day I started flipping it around and I asked myself:

"What if I had died at the end of 2012?"

2012 was a pretty decent year for me, one of the last good ones I can remember. And honestly, had I died in December of that year, I think I would be just fine with that. There isn't really anything past that time that I would have kicked myself for missing out on, and in fact, there's a whole bunch of suffering and BS I would have completely avoided.

Just thought I would share that mind trick.
About the same thought. the experiences I've had are good, and I am generally thankful for them, but it wouldve been ok without them too.
 
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Reactions: rozeske and silent.desperation
donsie

donsie

She whispered and it echoed
Jan 9, 2024
75
One of the things I have always struggled with when it comes to ctb is the "what if?" thing.

Oh what if things improve?
What if I miss out on X?
What if this bad thing doesn't actually happen?
And so on.

That's been one of the primary drivers keeping me alive.

But then one day I started flipping it around and I asked myself:

"What if I had died at the end of 2012?"

2012 was a pretty decent year for me, one of the last good ones I can remember. And honestly, had I died in December of that year, I think I would be just fine with that. There isn't really anything past that time that I would have kicked myself for missing out on, and in fact, there's a whole bunch of suffering and BS I would have completely avoided.

Just thought I would share that mind trick.
Thank you for sharing this mind trick. A different perspective to add to my thought process today.
 
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Reactions: rozeske and silent.desperation
dinosavr

dinosavr

and if i’m turning blue, please, don’t save me 🌛
Dec 14, 2023
695
To me that's one thing, and the other thing is that everybody has to go at some point anyway. There will be always a potential something in the future and we will have to let it go no matter what.
 
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Reactions: rozeske and Tears in Rain

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