breatheout

breatheout

spotty with being online. chronically online tbh
Dec 17, 2023
42
hi im just yelling into an echo chamber where i wont be judged but i havent posted in months. i briefly became an alcoholic, went sober, and now going sober from all substances since im harshly declining in life quality. im straight loosing it with all my university work, i want to die so bad, but i cant. i cant die during the holidays, then my best friends birthday is too soon. im too fucking broke to get diagnosed with anything so i was basically self medicating and now im flat dry of money which really sucks. my parents pay for my university and i live at home but i dont even have a job. im literally a fucking mess now, i got a cold which is making everything so much worse my head feels light and ive been in and out of derealization all day. not killing myself yet though. i just needed somewhere to rant so sos so bad becaudse im actually loosing my mind i think. as long as im breaything im alive and its all real its so real
 
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