• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
socrates

socrates

I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance.
Dec 3, 2019
304
About two years ago I planned to CTB in early July, but things changed and I decided to let my ticket expire. Well that date is fast approaching, and I feel it's time to board. It's funny when I started making plans I didn't have a single friend, now I have a few really close ones. I even have someone who I've really been clicking with and we might form a romantic relationship. Of course this complicates my departure because I don't want to abandon my new found friends. The problem is I fear if I don't act now my chances of leaving may be significantly lower. More peaceful, pleasant options may also no longer be available. I can not continue to ignore my financial and health problems and expect them to just disappear. The bill will come due soon and I don't want to be hear to pay it.

Boarding the bus will be a difficult task. Weather or not it is wise to board a bus that has no known destination I do not know. I suppose everyone boards it one day so it might just be sparing me from copious amounts of grief. I also suffer from the poison known as hope. I cling onto a small chance that things may get better, but the far more probable outcome is for things to become unimaginably worse.

I guess I just wanted to vent a little.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Bct and itsamadworld
DeathIsTheWayOut99

DeathIsTheWayOut99

Warlock
Jun 6, 2020
798
I think I can relate to this

Its weird, and I really really hate saying this but I feel that the reason why I have not died yet is that I am holding onto somethign

Hope of a better life

Hope of love

Hope of friends

So on and so forth

Yet at the same time every passing day is a punch to the face

I am living art home where I grew up abused and I dont know how much I can take

Every flashback and trigger drives me into a suicidal mess

I am afraid I might do something out of desperation, but doing suicide out of desperation can lead to disastrous results

I wish suicide was something that could be granted to you, and you could just do it peacefully. I am in the US so such thing doesn't exist here :(

FUCK
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Bct, itsamadworld and socrates

Similar threads

thrim
Replies
1
Views
233
Suicide Discussion
moralfag
moralfag
T
Replies
14
Views
722
Suicide Discussion
TrulyNeverCertain
T
sanctionedusage
Replies
0
Views
176
Suicide Discussion
sanctionedusage
sanctionedusage
bussy
Replies
7
Views
592
Suicide Discussion
SASU-KE
SASU-KE
joegoes100
Replies
0
Views
270
Suicide Discussion
joegoes100
joegoes100