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Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
It might seem private and safe for you to do whatever it is you wanna do that others would never want to find out when you're alone in you room with the computer but I warn you, you log into that browser and then you're as public as you are walking down the street. I've come to the realisation that the internet was and became a trap for me to be exploited by those who sought to destroy me and I was an easy target for them. I made that happen myself by annoying too many others over too many years and not putting in any effort to steer myself away. My life is going to be very different now because of what has been done. I'm going to have to face the world that I have created for myself, hide away evermore in my room, loathed to come out or ctb. The route to any sort of salvation is only through the most tremendous sacrifice, something that has only been an abstraction for me up until now. Soon it will be reality.
 
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T

Thefuture

Member
Feb 28, 2022
89
It might seem private and safe for you to do whatever it is you wanna do that others would never want to find out when you're alone in you room with the computer but I warn you, you log into that browser and then you're as public as you are walking down the street. I've come to the realisation that the internet was and became a trap for me to be exploited by those who sought to destroy me and I was an easy target for them. I made that happen myself by annoying too many others over too many years and not putting in any effort to steer myself away. My life is going to be very different now because of what has been done. I'm going to have to face the world that I have created for myself, hide away evermore in my room, loathed to come out or ctb. The route to any sort of salvation is only through the most tremendous sacrifice, something that has only been an abstraction for me up until now. Soon it will be reality.
What did you do?
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
Watched hardcore porn but didn't work for most of the past 10 years and be an unmotivated idle asshole who alienated everyone. I also do have psychological issues but won't be getting help or any respite from those now because of consequences. I offended some important people with police connections and they basically destroyed me. Tapped my internet and leaked everything. I thought only for myself and now everyone despises me as a sad horny loser. Unemployable. Can't go outside.

And I deserve it. Past me didn't care about where current me would be and pleased himself.
 
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whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,913
Hardcore porn? Something illegal? 😳
 
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G

Gordy99

Student
Jan 7, 2022
143
Watched hardcore porn but didn't work for most of the past 10 years and be an unmotivated idle asshole who alienated everyone. I also do have psychological issues but won't be getting help or any respite from those now because of consequences. I offended some important people with police connections and they basically destroyed me. Tapped my internet and leaked everything. I thought only for myself and now everyone despises me as a sad horny loser. Unemployable. Can't go outside.

And I deserve it. Past me didn't care about where current me would be and pleased himself.

Did they leak your internet history that shows you looked at this porn? Or did they capture you masturbating to the porn?
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
Hardcore porn? Something illegal? 😳
No not illegal but I also was considered 'pervy' because of my appearance and mannerisms. I was just overwhelmingly insecure in myself and it was picked upon.
Did they leak your internet history that shows you looked at this porn? Or did they capture you masturbating to the porn?
I'm not sure exactly how I was leaked watching this porn since I'm being kept in the dark and surrounded by manipulative people who are doing that on purpose for reasons known to themselves. Certainly must be implicating videos from a hacked smartphone or images from a hacked smartphone I suspect. Of course it could be fabricated but I think we're beyond that now.
 
VoidDesirer22

VoidDesirer22

A dream inside a locked room
Sep 6, 2021
673
No not illegal but I also was considered 'pervy' because of my appearance and mannerisms. I was just overwhelmingly insecure in myself and it was picked upon.

I'm not sure exactly how I was leaked watching this porn since I'm being kept in the dark and surrounded by manipulative people who are doing that on purpose for reasons known to themselves. Certainly must be implicating videos from a hacked smartphone or images from a hacked smartphone I suspect. Of course it could be fabricated but I think we're beyond that now.
At least it wasn't illegal. They all watch porn too. It's rampant.
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
At least it wasn't illegal. They all watch porn too. It's rampant.
They know my private fetishes now and alongside other issues this is going to be excruciating in the future. I'll not be able to go anywhere, get a job or have friends in my situation. It's not the one issue in itself that fucks me. I'm fucked in every other way too. Can't enjoy life. Have no prospects.

This isn't a hit someone of my already dire social standing could take.
 
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VoidDesirer22

VoidDesirer22

A dream inside a locked room
Sep 6, 2021
673
They know my private fetishes now and alongside other issues this is going to be excruciating in the future. I'll not be able to go anywhere, get a job or have friends in my situation. It's not the one issue in itself that fucks me. I'm fucked in every other way too. Can't enjoy life. Have no prospects.

This isn't a hit someone of my already dire social standing could take.
I sanction any suicide.

If I was made to feel that vulnerable then my SN would be waiting for me and I'd endure the fast heart beats and the headaches.
 
N

noaccount

Enlightened
Oct 26, 2019
1,099
As long as it wasn't child abuse material, I don't see that being 'outed' as watching porn of consenting adults would stop you from getting a job.
 
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whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,913
Your story is very similar to that of Gordy, and my opinion is identical. I think you suffer from persecutory paranoia, good luck with that. Seeing it is the first step.

What is "hardcore porn" to you? Rocco Siffredi?
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
As long as it wasn't child abuse material, I don't see that being 'outed' as watching porn of consenting adults would stop you from getting a job.
Well I also developed a 'following' online due to being weird and creepy and 'looking like a perv'. I shit you not. I'm autistic and have a tic disorder. It's in that context that this is lethal. People are going back through everything I've even done and where I've been and painted me as a pervert.
 
N

noaccount

Enlightened
Oct 26, 2019
1,099
Was the material in question of consenting adults?
 
A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
Was the material in question of consenting adults?
Yeah but some of it might've been kinky like bondage and stuff. As far as you can go but honestly I do actually find much of that distasteful myself, it's just the sites would show some of the stuff. Not sure when the data was stolen. Could've all been as far back as 2018 but I might even be being tracked online now despite my best efforts to evade it.

I suppose its not wrong in of itself, legally or even objectively, but that's not how people roll. I'm not a person who can get away with this with the people in my vicinity. They think me having seen this stuff is fucked up.
 
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GentleJerk

GentleJerk

Carrot juice pimp.
Dec 14, 2021
1,372
Like whatevs said this sounds like it could be something else. But if it's how you say it is, maybe it's not worth worrying so much and placing such importance on what other people think. That's just putting power over you into their hands. I reckon you should just own it like a boss and not be so ashamed. If that's who you are. There are plenty of people with much worse closet skeletons than watching porn.
 
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A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
Ultimately I think it is about something else. More so being autistic, what II look like and my poor work history being sources of anger.
 
N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
6,029
I am not sure what I shall think about this post. Maybe you consider this question offending but have you ever been diagnosed with psychosis or schizophrenia?
I had psychosis in the past and had sometimes similar thoughts. But this could also really happening to someone. On the internet it is pretty hard to differentiate on what is delusional or what is real.
I am really really not sure in this case. But I have read posts in the past of clearly delusional members (who have not listened to me...)
 
A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
I'm not delusional trust me. People never believe what is possible till it is seen to happen. Everyone in my neighbourhood has been talking about me for a week.
 
Last edited:
G

Gordy99

Student
Jan 7, 2022
143
Your story is very similar to that of Gordy, and my opinion is identical. I think you suffer from persecutory paranoia, good luck with that. Seeing it is the first step.

What is "hardcore porn" to you? Rocco Siffredi?

Of course you don't believe him. Do you believe anyone in regards to these bizarre types of situations? Based on the OP's posts it seems like people are talking about him and his activity. These people behind the campaign most likely installed spyware on his devices years ago that captured all of his activity.

@Area Man I doubt you are delusional despite what others here think. You should read my Weird Situation thread in the recovery section when you have time. It's three pages and has a lot of information but my situation is somewhat similar to yours. Out of curiosity...have you confronted anyone in your neighborhood about this leaked content? How do you know they are talking about you? Have you overheard their conversations? I confronted people at work in regards to my situation years ago and they all denied knowing anything.
 
A

Area Man

Student
Mar 31, 2021
124
Of course you don't believe him. Do you believe anyone in regards to these bizarre types of situations? Based on the OP's posts it seems like people are talking about him and his activity. These people behind the campaign most likely installed spyware on his devices years ago that captured all of his activity.
I strongly suspect police powers were abused to do this and track my smartphone and social media accounts. I actually put a police report in about harassment outside my address but it's probably the case that the police didn't like me and that's where it started. They checked but they didn't find anything illegal.

@Area Man I doubt you are delusional despite what others here think. You should read my Weird Situation thread in the recovery section when you have time. It's three pages and has a lot of information but my situation is somewhat similar to yours. Out of curiosity...have you confronted anyone in your neighborhood about this leaked content? How do you know they are talking about you? Have you overheard their conversations? I confronted people at work in regards to my situation years ago and they all denied knowing anything.

I'll have a look if I've chance. I haven't been confronted directly because I don't feel comfortable leaving the house because of what I've heard in the street below with neighbours gathering to say the most horrible, malicious things like I'm slimy, pathetic, pervy and they want me dead. They are clearly referencing to 'sources' they've seen somewhere on the internet and know personal stuff about me no one but me aught to know.

I live with a relative and I have spoken with other relatives these past weeks who know what is going on. They are not only talking behind my back but dropping indirect smears when I'm in earshot. Don't know what you call that. Talking to themselves indiscreetly. It references my situation and make no sense in any other context. When I ask "am I being talked about?" or "is anything about me circulating on the internet?" they just give out the most natural stock denials in response. So I am being gaslighted.

Thank you for reaching out Gordy99, we should speak more if the opportunity arises. Can you link that thread?
 
G

Gordy99

Student
Jan 7, 2022
143
I strongly suspect police powers were abused to do this and track my smartphone and social media accounts. I actually put a police report in about harassment outside my address but it's probably the case that the police didn't like me and that's where it started. They checked but they didn't find anything illegal.



I'll have a look if I've chance. I haven't been confronted directly because I don't feel comfortable leaving the house because of what I've heard in the street below with neighbours gathering to say the most horrible, malicious things like I'm slimy, pathetic, pervy and they want me dead. They are clearly referencing to 'sources' they've seen somewhere on the internet and know personal stuff about me no one but me aught to know.

I live with a relative and I have spoken with other relatives these past weeks who know what is going on. They are not only talking behind my back but dropping indirect smears when I'm in earshot. Don't know what you call that. Talking to themselves indiscreetly. It references my situation and make no sense in any other context. When I ask "am I being talked about?" or "is anything about me circulating on the internet?" they just give out the most natural stock denials in response. So I am being gaslighted.

Thank you for reaching out Gordy99, we should speak more if the opportunity arises. Can you link that thread?

Police powers were most likely abused. Just remember that not all police are bad. Some police abuse their power and others do the right thing. One of the predators behind my smear campaign is connected to the police so I know they are involved. It's almost like the police vs. the police in my situation.

I don't fully understand the part where people in your life are keeping it a secret but I guess this is how these weird situations play out. The people in my life are keeping it a secret as well despite some of them giving me nasty looks and talking behind my back.

I would like to chat with you but there is no option to chat or send a private message to you. I don't remember the post count needed for these features to be enabled.
 

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