the fear of the unknown

[asphyxiangel]

i have been suicidal for the last 12 years of my life. ive written countless notes and came close to it many times.
but the only thing keeping me from pulling the trigger (figuratively and literally) is not knowing what comes after

first, im terrified by the thought of death on its own. will i know in my final moments that im dying or will it be so quick that i cant even comprehend it? how will it feel? how fast would it be?
second, the fear of what comes after. i dont really believe in a heaven or hell but what if they ARE real and my soul is cursed forever lol . will i know that im dead? will i be able to look down on my loved ones? the scariest part of death to me is the fact no one can describe it for obvious reasons so idk what to expect

i know we all die eventually, and realistically i would prefer to go on my own terms. but i still cant bring myself to do it and idk how to just get over it

does anyone think this way too? that the ONLY reason you're still here is because you fear what comes after?

 

[whywere]

I am of the firm belief that our spirit never ever "dies". Physical body, yes, spirit, no.

I still enjoy a wonderful sunrise and/or sunset, and traveling, and when the quantity overtakes

When quantity overtakes the quality of life, then it is time to do some in depth thinking, quantity vs quality is because I have 24/7 chronic pain.

Wishing huge hugs, caring thoughts and wonderful sunny days to/for you, as you are also wonderful.

Walter

 

[darksouls]

I think death is the beginning of something new

 

[Forever Sleep]

I have this more at the back of my mind as a niggling worry. My more pressing worry is the physical experience of death and that a suicide attempt needs to work.

It's hard to reassure myself entirely about an afterlife. I'm hoping for nothing personally. Still, I try to reassure myself with a few things. The first being that whatever is coming is unavoidable. Secondly, that if there is a God, I've likely already done enough to damn myself. So, I doubt suicide will necessarily have much more impact. If turning your back on God is the unforgiveable sin- I'm already f*cked!

Also, the fact they we don't seem to have any consistent or concrete proof of an afterlife may lend weight to there not being one. I suppose there could be one with no consistent or traceable connection to this world. Sure, there are ghost stories but, with the billions upon billions of deaths that have now occurred here- wouldn't there be more of them? Estimates are, over 109 billion humans have died. If ghosts are real, we ought to be overrun with them! That's 13 ghosts for every one human.

 

[itwillhappensoon]

I stopped believing in heaven and hell years ago after thoroughly examining religious text , for me I don't believe in any gods whatsoever and I look forward to death and the peace of non-existence that comes after .

 

[whywere]

I think death is the beginning of something new

Totally agree with you.

I have a wonderous feeling when I think about it.

Walter

 

[hedezev4]

Well, death is inevitable, so there's no point in being afraid of it. I've come to realize that three things can happen:

1. Nothing. This is what I truly want and what I believe will happen with 99% certainty.
2. I'll wake up and remember everything. That's a bad outcome, but at least the rules of the game will become clear.
3. I'll wake up without memory. That's a neutral outcome — and for you, nothing really changes. You'll just keep dying and being reborn without memory, but that doesn't matter since you won't remember anything.

For me, the fear of death is similar to the fear of going to do something serious — like getting your teeth fixed. It's scary because of how much it might cost or how painful it might be, but in the end, you'll have to fix them anyway.

So yes, I am a little scared, but I'm calm because I know I'll go through with it. The fear of leaving my death in the hands of fate, like dying in old age in suffering, is far greater. So I will definitely CTB.