The fact that there are so many suffering human beings on earth scares the shit out of me

[noname223]

I mean even in western societies the people suffer so much. This forum is full of people from rich countries and many of us suffer immensely.

I sometimes imagine which nasty and cyncial things could happen next in my life. Like fucking up a suicide attempt and then being damaged for the rest of my life. This scares me very much.

I often ruminate what horrible things could happen in my future. Then I try to calm me down by saying that not everything of that is very likely. Then the following thought comes in my mind. Just imagine there are roundabout 8 billion people on earth. There must be happening unimaginable pain to some people. Like the most nightmarish and torturous things/existences must be happen. Just in this second there are probably a lot of people in unimaginabe pain. Thousands of people must be locked in hellish and nightmarish conditions. The most cynical shit just happens and I can't do anything agains that.

Moreover there will probably happen also happen tormenting things in my future. I am so fucking anxious. It is just the statistics that scare me. If there are so many humans there must be like 1-3% (maybe way way more) who experience insane pain every single day. Human existence is so fucking scary. One of the best things in my life is that I will never procreate. I am kind of proud about that. Life can be extremely scary if you ever have experienced extreme pain like I did.

 

[FuneralCry]

Life scares me a lot as well. I do not understand how anyone could want to live in such a horrible world. Things could easily get so much worse for anyone and just the fact that so much suffering exists is enough to make me want to leave. Life is also terrifying as there is no limit as to how bad things can get.

This is why the thought of non existence comforts me a lot. I am also terrified of failing ctb and it is what holds me back from attempting. I think the thing that would make life more bearable for many people is the option of a reliable and peaceful way to exit for when the time is right for them.