Hello all,
I am not for a violent Exit. The thoughts are with me everyday, sometimes non-stop, to end my Life, to take my Exit. Having been employed in High Risk Work, or even just driving a car, I am forever thinking about ending my Exit. At Work, it was easier to convince myself not to do this, the follow-on effects to my work comrades would be too much. I am unemployed at the moment, I have limited social contact, my parental units are thousands of kilometres away. I have been waiting out their deaths for almost 10 years now, so my Exit will not be a burden to them, but I can wait no longer. Recently my father went thru some hectic health related events. It provided an opportunity to catch up with my parental units in person, the first in over ≈5 years. It dawned on me then, that I cannot wait for their deaths, and I know it will bring much pain to them, I cannot wait. I must take my Exit, lately the pain of my mental scar has become too much, and I grow frustrated with the fact that I am still alive, I still have not located the Exit.
I have opted for the Carbon Monoxide method. I have obtained 95-98% Sulfuric acid, and 85% Formic acid. I am going to either go for a nominal small reaction, or double. For double, I will be mixing 370mL of Formic acid with 500mL of Sulfuric acid. I have a 1000mL round bottom flask, or a 2000mL conical flask. I will place either flask into a large PTFE container. The bung on the container, located at the base has asealed tube running into a 1L bottle of tap water, with ≈500mL of water. The tube will entre the 1L bottle below the water line, this is my method to filter the reaction from the PTFE container, with the aim of drawing filtered CO thru another longer tube in the lid of the 1L water bottle. I do not have a mask, or nasal tubes, so I will be shaving, and taping the tube to my face, with the end of the tube in my mouth. I have done a dry run of this, and the pressure is observed in the water bottle. The only thing I really want to improve on is, the mixing of the reagents, I am out of money, and I do not want to be emptying one part into another part, and having the reaction become violent, instant. I will work on the dripper, and may have to dig around for some lose change and buy some PTFE tube from the hardware store. The dripper will just be an inverted glass bottle, the smaller of the two acids, with a sealed PTFE tube punctured thru the lid. The inverted glass will be suspended in the larger container with steel rod off-cuts I have lying around.
I plan setuping in the shower, it has a very a lengthy base, and only a curtain dividing from the rest of the bathroom. I will be sitting down here, with my Exit contraption beside me, with the breather tube fixed to my mouth. I most likely will strip down, or be in minimal clothing. The door will be closed with warning label printed and affixed to it, as well as the CO contraption. I have no house mates, and am expecting no visitors. I am excited, and for the first time in years, I feel like I have moved to a new part of the World, and made the next exciting step in my life.
I am not for a violent Exit. The thoughts are with me everyday, sometimes non-stop, to end my Life, to take my Exit. Having been employed in High Risk Work, or even just driving a car, I am forever thinking about ending my Exit. At Work, it was easier to convince myself not to do this, the follow-on effects to my work comrades would be too much. I am unemployed at the moment, I have limited social contact, my parental units are thousands of kilometres away. I have been waiting out their deaths for almost 10 years now, so my Exit will not be a burden to them, but I can wait no longer. Recently my father went thru some hectic health related events. It provided an opportunity to catch up with my parental units in person, the first in over ≈5 years. It dawned on me then, that I cannot wait for their deaths, and I know it will bring much pain to them, I cannot wait. I must take my Exit, lately the pain of my mental scar has become too much, and I grow frustrated with the fact that I am still alive, I still have not located the Exit.
I have opted for the Carbon Monoxide method. I have obtained 95-98% Sulfuric acid, and 85% Formic acid. I am going to either go for a nominal small reaction, or double. For double, I will be mixing 370mL of Formic acid with 500mL of Sulfuric acid. I have a 1000mL round bottom flask, or a 2000mL conical flask. I will place either flask into a large PTFE container. The bung on the container, located at the base has asealed tube running into a 1L bottle of tap water, with ≈500mL of water. The tube will entre the 1L bottle below the water line, this is my method to filter the reaction from the PTFE container, with the aim of drawing filtered CO thru another longer tube in the lid of the 1L water bottle. I do not have a mask, or nasal tubes, so I will be shaving, and taping the tube to my face, with the end of the tube in my mouth. I have done a dry run of this, and the pressure is observed in the water bottle. The only thing I really want to improve on is, the mixing of the reagents, I am out of money, and I do not want to be emptying one part into another part, and having the reaction become violent, instant. I will work on the dripper, and may have to dig around for some lose change and buy some PTFE tube from the hardware store. The dripper will just be an inverted glass bottle, the smaller of the two acids, with a sealed PTFE tube punctured thru the lid. The inverted glass will be suspended in the larger container with steel rod off-cuts I have lying around.
I plan setuping in the shower, it has a very a lengthy base, and only a curtain dividing from the rest of the bathroom. I will be sitting down here, with my Exit contraption beside me, with the breather tube fixed to my mouth. I most likely will strip down, or be in minimal clothing. The door will be closed with warning label printed and affixed to it, as well as the CO contraption. I have no house mates, and am expecting no visitors. I am excited, and for the first time in years, I feel like I have moved to a new part of the World, and made the next exciting step in my life.
