The Bridge

[Mi Mi]

I saw the news about the bridge going down.
I think in Baltimore.
As terrified as I am of water and drowning God I wish it was me.

I was jealous of the people who probably died.
And felt bad for the loved ones who are waiting for the news.

I get jealous when I hear about people dying or dead.
They always seem to love life and want more time.
The ones who die are always going to be missed, a great person, they lit up a room.

I wouldn't hesitate to trade places.
Why does God take people who want to be here, have things to live for, have dreams to go for.

But he won't take me.
I have none of that.
I'm so ready.

Do you ever get jealous when you hear about someone dying.
Or having a successful suicide.
Or is it just my warped mind.

 

[Olisop21.]

I saw the news about the bridge going down.
I think in Baltimore.
As terrified as I am of water and drowning God I wish it was me.

I was jealous of the people who probably died.
And felt bad for the loved ones who are waiting for the news.

I get jealous when I hear about people dying or dead.
They always seem to love life and want more time.
The ones who die are always going to be missed, a great person, they lit up a room.

I wouldn't hesitate to trade places.
Why does God take people who want to be here, have things to live for, have dreams to go for.

But he won't take me.
I have none of that.
I'm so ready.

Do you ever get jealous when you hear about someone dying.
Or having a successful suicide.
Or is it just my warped mind.

Yes. Wish I was there.

 

[Agon321]

I often ask myself this question:
Why am I alive and someone better than me died?
The answer is simple and brutal: The world is not fair. It is also neither good nor bad.

I am not a valuable person. I don't care about my health at all. And yet I live, and those better than me do not. Of course, I'm young, so I have greater resistance to health problems. Most likely, if I lived a few more years, I would still die of a heart attack or something similar.

This life in general has no meaning.
We have to come to terms with these facts. The world doesn't care about our thoughts

 

[rozeske]

Me too. It the jealousy eats at me when others die. When people cry during funerals am standing there like 👁•👁 or on the rare occasions i do it's for my unlucky soul that wishes to trade places.

 

[F@#$]

I'm the same way. People getting shot,I was just thinking earlier today. "How come I didn't get the chance to go die in a war?" I'm totally jealous of people who get killed.

 

[Lookingtoflyfree]

I wonder why some people die when they do. I wonder why some people are abusive and target the good ones.

 

[beaten96]

Oh I got my bridge picked out.. the doctors gave me an assload of muscle relaxers… so I'm going to take them all and jump.. there isn't any point to try.. I don't know when.. but yeah.. just as long as it's not in this hick he'll hole of people I hate.. all of them worthless trash.. justice wants its abortion.. it's got it.,

 

[4am]

terrible news for the wire fans

 

[sserafim]

I heard about that; my mom told my uncle about it. Tbh I wish we could've been there

 

[lifewasawillowtv]

I feel exactly the same way, I don't feel good about thinking/feeling this was at all don't get me wrong but that doesn't stop or change the fact that it's still how I feel.

 

[FuneralCry]

I always envy those who die, to me they are the true and only fortunate ones as they no longer have the ability to suffer in this cruel, meaningless existence, it's comforting to think of permanently ceasing to exist, all I see as desirable is the peace of an eternal, dreamless sleep.

 

[beaten96]

You wanna hear something funny.. I was going through the scanner at the court house.. I keep an emergency razor blade in me at all times.. in case I just snap in some random place and I'm just fuckin ending it.. shoving that fucker in my neck and later.. and the cops have a scanner there.. and they saw it in the x ray.. i had to pull some shit out of my ass.. the cops staring at my emergency suicide escape. lol.. and they can't say shit…. No worries. Like - trillion more where that came from..


I have quite a few ways to actually
Kill myself..

I think about that a lot actually.. just stab myself in the neck.. there isn't much they can really do..

As you can tell.. my doctors frantic scramble for shoving lexapro 20 mg down my throat has proven futile..

Then again what do they expect with how they all act and behave..

I just spent forever in the mental hospital and they had me on all the drugs.. this last January and February.. then I got out and found out my mom died.. and then it continued being more bullshit on top of that and kept compounding..

So yeah.. it doesn't matter what I do.. I should have just killed myself in Seattle.. save myself the headache..

I promised my self that after this time.. I'm never chasing life again.. next I time I get that far that I'm ready to go.. I'm killing myself.. not going to to the hospital..

But loool.. I spent my court day with cops staring at one of many weapons of choice.. and plenty more where they came from..

I'm so excited to be dead.. I can't wait..

 

[bipbapbop]

The bridge accident was so incredibly sad. It breaks my heart that there are people on both sides of the spectrum who are suffering. People who want to live, but die and people who want to die, but live.

 

[Mi Mi]

I wonder why some people die when they do. I wonder why some people are abusive and target the good ones.

Same

The bridge accident was so incredibly sad. It breaks my heart that there are people on both sides of the spectrum who are suffering. People who want to live, but die and people who want to die, but live.

Yes
It bothers me every day

You wanna hear something funny.. I was going through the scanner at the court house.. I keep an emergency razor blade in me at all times.. in case I just snap in some random place and I'm just fuckin ending it.. shoving that fucker in my neck and later.. and the cops have a scanner there.. and they saw it in the x ray.. i had to pull some shit out of my ass.. the cops staring at my emergency suicide escape. lol.. and they can't say shit…. No worries. Like - trillion more where that came from..


I have quite a few ways to actually
Kill myself..

I think about that a lot actually.. just stab myself in the neck.. there isn't much they can really do..

As you can tell.. my doctors frantic scramble for shoving lexapro 20 mg down my throat has proven futile..

Then again what do they expect with how they all act and behave..

I just spent forever in the mental hospital and they had me on all the drugs.. this last January and February.. then I got out and found out my mom died.. and then it continued being more bullshit on top of that and kept compounding..

So yeah.. it doesn't matter what I do.. I should have just killed myself in Seattle.. save myself the headache..

I promised my self that after this time.. I'm never chasing life again.. next I time I get that far that I'm ready to go.. I'm killing myself.. not going to to the hospital..

But loool.. I spent my court day with cops staring at one of many weapons of choice.. and plenty more where they came from..

I'm so excited to be dead.. I can't wait..

Sorry about your mom
I like how you said chasing life
I never thought of it that way

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I envy those who have died as well as they cannot suffer anymore and I wish I was dead too

 

[wait.what]

Yeah, I feel that way when someone I care about dies. Sometimes when a stranger dies too.

I'm currently sitting next to a kind of ofrenda/memorial wall in my living room, with pictures of six departed friends and family members on it. None lived long enough to get old, and none wanted to die. I'd have gone in any of their places. Shit, I'd have gone with bells on. That wasn't a decision I got to make, though.

Reality doesn't care about your preferences or your opinion of it. It is what it is.

Edit: @beaten96 — Your mom died while you were in the hospital and they didn't tell you? WTF? Did they imagine that hearing the news late would make you less suicidal and better equipped to live on your own? Or did they just figure the hospital was so useless that it made no difference if you learned of her death while on the ward, surrounded by shrinks, or in a Taco Bell drive thru on the way back home?

I'm very sorry for your loss. All of your losses.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

When I heard about it, I couldn't help but be jealous. I'm always on the wrong bridge.
New CTB term.... Catch The Bridge..

 

[cec]

I saw the news about the bridge going down.
I think in Baltimore.
As terrified as I am of water and drowning God I wish it was me.

I was jealous of the people who probably died.
And felt bad for the loved ones who are waiting for the news.

I get jealous when I hear about people dying or dead.
They always seem to love life and want more time.
The ones who die are always going to be missed, a great person, they lit up a room.

I wouldn't hesitate to trade places.
Why does God take people who want to be here, have things to live for, have dreams to go for.

But he won't take me.
I have none of that.
I'm so ready.

Do you ever get jealous when you hear about someone dying.
Or having a successful suicide.
Or is it just my warped mind.

I'm new to posting on here so I'm sorry if I'm doing it wrong but I wanted to say that I 100% agree with what you said

 

[Mi Mi]

I'm new to posting on here so I'm sorry if I'm doing it wrong but I wanted to say that I 100% agree with what you said

You'll get the hang of it
My first time back Last year it took me about a week

 

[cec]

You'll get the hang of it
My first time back Last year it took me about a week

lol thank you

 

[Gonnerr]

If i knew , I would have drive on that bridge , or if i knew which one is the next plane to crash , i would be happy to buy a ticket.

I think plane crash is the best especially in the ocean , no chance of survival.

Even if SI kick in , well nothing you can do about it.

Yep , plane crash in the ocean would be my preferred method to die.