Venting The biggest factor in my suicidal ideation!

[OneAndOnly!!]

I'm truly not "actively suicidal" or anything of the such, but there's always been a huge embarrassing factor that tends to push me to that edge. My misophonia!!!! I have an extreme case where the thought of sounds, even small ones, that trigger me can send me into a suicidal panic!! I can't list the amount of times I've seriously considered on the spot suicide or self harm from someone scribbling with a pencil!!

It's a little silly, but I feel like no one talks about it!! It's very isolating because many people think I'm being dramatic or a brat, but it's personally a debilitating condition. I really wish more people understood how it effects people, but I can usually only take solace in others online with the same problem…

 

[LostZombie]

It's a little silly, but I feel like no one talks about it!! It's very isolating because many people think I'm being dramatic or a brat, but it's personally a debilitating condition.

Awww you poor thing it's not silly, it's a condition that hurts in ways that others can't understand. It's understandable why you would get suicide panics, it's only natural for your brain to think of the easiest way out. I hope that you can get some help with that in some way, for it.

 

[OneAndOnly!!]

Awww you poor thing it's not silly, it's a condition that hurts in ways that others can't understand. It's understandable why you would get suicide panics, it's only natural for your brain to think of the easiest way out. I hope that you can get some help with that in some way, for it.

Thank you!! Its always been a little embarrassing to admit! I'm going on medication for it soon!!

 

[hmnow]

I'm truly not "actively suicidal" or anything of the such, but there's always been a huge embarrassing factor that tends to push me to that edge. My misophonia!!!! I have an extreme case where the thought of sounds, even small ones, that trigger me can send me into a suicidal panic!! I can't list the amount of times I've seriously considered on the spot suicide or self harm from someone scribbling with a pencil!!

It's a little silly, but I feel like no one talks about it!! It's very isolating because many people think I'm being dramatic or a brat, but it's personally a debilitating condition. I really wish more people understood how it effects people, but I can usually only take solace in others online with the same problem…

How do you try to handle it

 

[perishsong]

It doesn't sound silly honestly - on the contrary, I can only imagine how much you suffer. Both from the noises your brain is desperate to avoid, and from misunderstanding in general population. Too much of the stimulus can be exhausting to say the least. I can't handle grocery stores and at worst, I feel like bashing my skull against the wall. Really hoping you can get actual help - you don't deserve to suffer.

 

[Macedonian1987]

I understand how you feel, and I know how much noise can be iritating. I don't have misophonia, but some days when my chronic pain gets really bad, even the smallest sound can irritate me immensely.

 

[OneAndOnly!!]

How do you try to handle it

Eeee usually music, noice cancelling earbuds (not headphones because i think i look silly with them), and a white noise machine!! They definitely lessen my breakdowns when I hear triggering noises, but its still a struggle !!

It doesn't sound silly honestly - on the contrary, I can only imagine how much you suffer. Both from the noises your brain is desperate to avoid, and from misunderstanding in general population. Too much of the stimulus can be exhausting to say the least. I can't handle grocery stores and at worst, I feel like bashing my skull against the wall. Really hoping you can get actual help - you don't deserve to suffer.

Thank uu!! it's so misunderstood even though it effects tons of people!!! i'm happy that other people understand my struggle here ^^