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Deek303

New Member
Aug 27, 2022
4
I did something that would destroy my life in such a way that I have no other option than to do it. I can't get into details but I effectively fucked any chance of me ever having a future. Intentionally. Purposefully.

I've been under such incredible stress and anxiety, dissociating, dry heaving, internal tremors, and on and on...

I have no option but to do it and I'm STILL scared.
 
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Lost in a Dream

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
1,820
I can relate to this. I've been planning and thinking about this for so long and yet I'm still afraid of what it will be like when I find the right camping spot, go there, and die in my tent after drinking the SN mixture. I'm sorry we're in the same boat of not having any other options and being afraid of it too. It really sucks.

Anyone who thinks that suicide is cowardly has obviously never been where we are and had to overcome the fear or the SI we have. If they understood even a small percentage of how we feel, they would change their tune.
 
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classicfukup

classicfukup

Member
Aug 23, 2022
22
I'm in a similar boat. I already had two attempts in the past, I don't know why it was so easy to do it then. Not to mention in horrible, spur of the moment ways that were destined to fail. Things have only gotten worse and now I am sort of struggling to face the reality of failing a 3rd time and having potential disfigurement, paralysis, or brain damage. I don't really wanna die and I'd love to get my life back but it's not gonna happen for me either.
If it helps, I don't think death is something to be afraid of. Just make sure you can do it correctly
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,546
To me there really is nothing easy about leaving this world. I am scared of many methods which is why I am still here. I wish that dying is as easy as just wishing to be gone. I'm sorry that you have been through so much in life, it sounds so awful what you have had to endure. I hope that you find freedom from your suffering.
 
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