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SeekingMoksha

SeekingMoksha

Member
May 6, 2020
17
Hello everyone. This is my 1st thread post on this website. I have been thinking about ending my life through overindulgence by alcohol and overeating and just in generally having a death wish. Don't know what else to do. I've been drinking is it's 4:00 rhis morning. I don't have anything else lose. I have flunked out of college about, I'm stupid and I'm ugly and I have failed to talk myself out of this feeling of being suicidal. There is no one else to talk to about this, because no one else gets how I'm feeling. I don't expect them to to, Because I understand that everyone is entitled to Their own orientation towards life. I do admit that it feels kind of lonely. I have tried to be normal just like everyone else, I find myself sticking out like a sore thumb. I find solace and drinking and doing a lot of illicitdrugs, Also over eating. Overeating has led me to being overweight which further alienates me from everyone else. So yeah that's it. And even when I was skinnier I couldn't find anything else to get excited about. I'm just sticking around until I eventually die in my sleep. Thanks for being kind.
 
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M

Meowkin

Student
May 6, 2020
183
Hello everyone. This is my 1st thread post on this website. I have been thinking about ending my life through overindulgence by alcohol and overeating and just in generally having a death wish. Don't know what else to do. I've been drinking is it's 4:00 rhis morning. I don't have anything else lose. I have flunked out of college about, I'm stupid and I'm ugly and I have failed to talk myself out of this feeling of being suicidal. There is no one else to talk to about this, because no one else gets how I'm feeling. I don't expect them to to, Because I understand that everyone is entitled to Their own orientation towards life. I do admit that it feels kind of lonely. I have tried to be normal just like everyone else, I find myself sticking out like a sore thumb. I find solace and drinking and doing a lot of illicitdrugs, Also over eating. Overeating has led me to being overweight which further alienates me from everyone else. So yeah that's it. And even when I was skinnier I couldn't find anything else to get excited about. I'm just sticking around until I eventually die in my sleep. Thanks for being kind.
It sounds like you're in a really bad place emotionally. I'm sorry for your pain. Self-destruction can be comforting when nothing else works.
 
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SeekingMoksha

SeekingMoksha

Member
May 6, 2020
17
It sounds like you're in a really bad place emotionally. I'm sorry for your pain. Self-destruction can be comforting when nothing else works.
Thanks for being so understanding and non-judgmental
 
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Good4Nothing

Good4Nothing

Unlovable
May 8, 2020
1,864
I've been slowly killing myself for years.
Smoking, drinking, eating crappy food, not exercising...
I keep hoping for that heart attack that never comes.
I still wake up every day.
 
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autumnal

autumnal

Enlightened
Feb 4, 2020
1,950
Your thread topic immediately made me think of this. Hope it gives you a chuckle.

 
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Blue Portal

Blue Portal

Member
May 6, 2020
66
Terrible idea I'm because your indescisive.
 
I

I’mDone

Experienced
Mar 22, 2020
261
Hello everyone. This is my 1st thread post on this website. I have been thinking about ending my life through overindulgence by alcohol and overeating and just in generally having a death wish. Don't know what else to do. I've been drinking is it's 4:00 rhis morning. I don't have anything else lose. I have flunked out of college about, I'm stupid and I'm ugly and I have failed to talk myself out of this feeling of being suicidal. There is no one else to talk to about this, because no one else gets how I'm feeling. I don't expect them to to, Because I understand that everyone is entitled to Their own orientation towards life. I do admit that it feels kind of lonely. I have tried to be normal just like everyone else, I find myself sticking out like a sore thumb. I find solace and drinking and doing a lot of illicitdrugs, Also over eating. Overeating has led me to being overweight which further alienates me from everyone else. So yeah that's it. And even when I was skinnier I couldn't find anything else to get excited about. I'm just sticking around until I eventually die in my sleep. Thanks for being kind.

Genuinely sorry that you're feeling this way. Just please be aware that overeating and drinking are very slow and eventually painful ways of ctb. You would get very very sick before dying.

Please don't feel alone. Vent on here, get things off your chest. It might help.
 
SeekingMoksha

SeekingMoksha

Member
May 6, 2020
17
Genuinely sorry that you're feeling this way. Just please be aware that overeating and drinking are very slow and eventually painful ways of ctb. You would get very very sick before dying.

Please don't feel alone. Vent on here, get things off your chest. It might help.
Don't know. You got any other good ideas of how to in my life? This world is hell and not for me.
Terrible idea I'm because your indescisive.
Okay, any other suggestions?
 
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I

I’mDone

Experienced
Mar 22, 2020
261
Don't know. You got any other good ideas of how to in my life? This world is hell and not for me.

Okay, any other suggestions?

There are lots of methods depending on where, what equipment or substances you can get, your tolerance for discomfort. I can't suggest a method but please have a think about it. Cirrhosis of the liver is horrible. So is congestive heart disease. If you really want to use alcohol it would be better to go swimming whilst very very drunk I think. I'm not a big drinker and I'm petrified of deep water so what would I know LOL.
 
NightmareTour

NightmareTour

Specialist
May 13, 2020
398
Been my way of life for a while now. Alcohol, drugs, heavy smoking, it started more as just a lack of regard for my health or lifespan, but now it's definitely turned more to being passively suicidal. I've ODed before, but it wasn't fatal. Felt horrible, but definitely wouldn't be the worst way to go. Finding the fatal doses of things is hard though, people in the medical field are pretty reluctant to share the fatal dose of most things to prevent people from using it for this purpose.
 
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beyond_aquila_rift

beyond_aquila_rift

Student
May 11, 2020
103
I guess I always lived like this but wouldn't consider it to be an actual method consciously
 

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