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ThirteenthStep

ThirteenthStep

We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion
Jul 30, 2021
8
Idk if I can actually go thru with it. I have a method in mind that might work but I'm afraid of hurting my family. Still, I wrote a suicide note.

"I'm sorry.
I know how selfish this is. I know how much pain it will cause. Please forgive me.
My heart is completely broken.
The COVID situation makes it pointless to stay.
Nothing to look forward to.
I'm tired.
I'm sorry."
 
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W

waitingforrest

Elementalist
Dec 27, 2021
842
I don't really know what to say, but I'll support you no matter what choice you make. Please do make sure you think about your method through. I wouldn't want you to suffer more. I hope all is well.
 
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Versailles

Versailles

Enlightened
Oct 1, 2020
1,652
I hope you feel good about your decision and do not feel pressured, from here I wish you the best in the world, hugs!
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,299
I think I will probably write a note as well, to give those left behind some closure and will mean they are not left with unanswered questions. Whatever happens, I wish you the best.
 
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L

Ligottian

Enlightened
Dec 19, 2021
1,009
I would sometimes overhear my parents say that I would never amount to anything. That would be it. But in fact I will not leave a note.
 
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UpandDownPrincess

UpandDownPrincess

Elementalist
Dec 31, 2019
833
If it is true, I would add something along the lines of, "You could not have stopped me. Please do not blame yourselves."

I like to think that might help someone left behind.
 
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ThirteenthStep

ThirteenthStep

We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion
Jul 30, 2021
8
If it is true, I would add something along the lines of, "You could not have stopped me. Please do not blame yourselves."

I like to think that might help someone left behind.
This is a good idea, thank you.
 
Crazy4u

Crazy4u

Enlightened
Sep 29, 2021
1,318
I am sorry you are feeling this way. you mentioned COVID in your note. please know the pandemic won't stay for long. people are fed up. I wish you the best
 
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SovietSuicide

SovietSuicide

Student
Jan 8, 2022
130
"I am unable to continue living, I am incapable of supporting myself

I have no other option, I have chosen to end my life via __ I am not a __ addict, I have chosen this method for it's success rate & lack of pain

Police will be informed via timed email, for my funeral do whatever is free/cheapest, for my estate leave it to my mother.

Only I can understand why I'm doing this, explaining it will only lead to unproductive assumptions.

I tried my best and it didn't work out, I'm sorry, I wish it wasn't like this.

If there was anything else I could do, I would have.

And for anyone reading this, if there was anything else you could have done, I'm sure you would have too.

Please move on quickly.

Goodbye."

I'm not sure if I should attempt to explain my reasons or just leave it like this, the reasons are complex and range throughout the span of my whole life, both personal and external, it's just pointless to try and convey all that, you just can't know until you experience it.
 
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gottago222

gottago222

paranoia bae
Dec 21, 2021
275
I am sorry you are feeling this way. you mentioned COVID in your note. please know the pandemic won't stay for long. people are fed up. I wish you the best
but how do you know? im exhausted like op. were strong for even making it this far. i can see nonsense going on until 2030 and i dont want to be here for it. i fully understand you op. i hope you find the peace you are searching for
 
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Depressed Cat

Depressed Cat

Mage
Jan 4, 2022
567
More than hurting your family, I'm worried about you hurting yourself.

You mentioned that you don't know if you could go through with it and that you have a method in mind. Taken together, it means you're not prepared at all.

If you're not absolutely, completely sure of succeeding with your method, then please don't do it! You could end up harming yourself and suffer even more than you do now.

I hope you think it out very carefully (especially about your method and chance of succeeding) and don't take any impulsive decision in haste. I wish you the best.
 
T

Ta555

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2021
1,317
I am sorry you are feeling this way. you mentioned COVID in your note. please know the pandemic won't stay for long. people are fed up. I wish you the best
The lockdown won't last but the disease will. For someone with preexisting health issues I am terrified. I don't see a future for myself. I already have complications now from respiratory virus which why I want to ctb so catching covid is my worst nightmare. A d yes I'm vaccinated but it still scares me. I'm terrified of the consequences it will have for me. And I can't outrun it forever. I don't see a future for myself because of my current condition and also covid which I mentioned on my own note.
 
Last edited:
L

LookieLou

Member
Dec 21, 2021
41
More than hurting your family, I'm worried about you hurting yourself.

You mentioned that you don't know if you could go through with it and that you have a method in mind. Taken together, it means you're not prepared at all.

If you're not absolutely, completely sure of succeeding with your method, then please don't do it! You could end up harming yourself and suffer even more than you do now.

I hope you think it out very carefully (especially about your method and chance of succeeding) and don't take any impulsive decision in haste. I wish you the best.
This is absolutely important. I had a good method but it didn't work — staff broke in to my hotel room — and my right shin to the ends of my toes were cold, yellow and numb. I've had problems walking ever since. I'm now using a walker all the time. It was 3 years ago. Why am I still here? I want absolute certainty that things will go as planned. And that takes time, research and no quick solutions.
 
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frvralone

frvralone

Member
Jan 5, 2022
7
I understand you. Everything is so pointless.. But should there be a point? An impulsive decision is not the best option. Remember that any of your choices are correct.
 
Depressed Cat

Depressed Cat

Mage
Jan 4, 2022
567
This is absolutely important. I had a good method but it didn't work — staff broke in to my hotel room — and my right shin to the ends of my toes were cold, yellow and numb. I've had problems walking ever since. I'm now using a walker all the time. It was 3 years ago. Why am I still here? I want absolute certainty that things will go as planned. And that takes time, research and no quick solutions.

I'm sorry to hear that your attempt was interrupted, leaving you worse than before. :aw:

The words of the OP do not sound convincing at all. Just "having a method in mind that might work" sounds like a recipe for disaster.

CTB is serious business and it takes great thought, contemplation, research and preparation for it. Impulsive decisions are not the way to go about it.
 

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