Discussion Suicidal Thoughts

[st4r53t]

To those having suicidal thoughts;

What happened that made them appear?
Some traumatic event aggravated your condition? Is the human world simply not for you?

 

[pebpebpebpeb]

for my suicidal thoughts which have popped up again, it's due to me performing badly in college. now that you ask this question, it's hard for me to pinpoint a real reason. i just want to die. i don't think there's much else to it. xD

 

[untildeathdousapart]

I dont know, i started to develop depression in my early teen years and thus came the suicidality. i struggle a lot with self image which comes from bullying that i received in primary school, but other than that there was no specific reason. I just never saw a point in living when all i have to do is work, study and get money. I don't see fun in that. anytime i started to feel slightly hopeful, something bad happened. I just gave up honestly.

 

[vak]

I feel like I was thrown into life without any training or support, and I've just been drowning for almost two decades now I've never been allowed to catch my breath and just letting go always seemed like the right path.

 

[hikikomorizombie]

it was brought on by my environment, & only having a mentally ill addict parent as a guardian + only adult in my life. though i was prob destined to commit suicide & be mentally ill anyways, as my whole family's fucked in 1 way or another, on both sides.

me being suicidal was exacerbated by traumatic events & being behind my peers in literally all aspects for some reason. except in intelligence, but we all know how little that matters

 

[EmptyHeaded]

I guess I wish it was because of some "proper" reason haha. I'm just too lazy to live.

 

[theboy]

i have had suicidal thoughts since i was a child. i also feel that the world is not for me.

 

[broth0100]

Ive just had suicidal ideation since i was in middle school. Idk i guess i was emo or smthn. Ive just been depressed since i was a preteen, no exceptional catalyst. My parents couldve been better but they weren't the worst either. Dunno, just never rlly wanted to live very long

 

[Dingusguy]

My guess is it's just because I kept fucking things up in everything I tried. I hate it because I want to be able to pick something or someone who is to blame for the way my head feels but the only person I have to blame is me, I am the one that fucked up everything I ever tried, and now I have dug so deep I am not sure I can ever climb back up.

Worst part is, there is plenty of time to change things yet I just do nothing. I think I have grown accustomed to losing, to fucking up, and now the thoughts in my head feel normal too.

 

[3/4Dead]

Depression hit with a vengeance when I was, idk, 9? 10? Mother said people who need help don't ask, so I tried showing not telling, went down a hard rabbit hole of self medication and drinking, remember feeling suicidal for the first time around then.

Maybe I feel like it's the only way to prove myself. The ultimate show-don't-tell.

"Look, I'm dead, I told you I was serious"

 

[FuneralCry]

My wish to die is a result of becoming aware of how truly undesirable existence is. I have no interest in suffering in this cruel, futile and pointless existence just to be tormented by old age and die anyway. I see existence as a horrific abomination and wanting suicide is all that feels rational to me to escape from all unnecessary suffering in this hellish existence where there is endless potential for cruelty, harm and torture.

I don't see anything appealing about being burdened with human existence, instead I'd always prefer the true peace of non-existence, I only wish for eternal nothingness as I don't wish to suffer in any way. I find it tragic how this repulsive human species even evolved all, the existence of life is the most terrible, horrific tragedy to me.

 

[BlockHammer]

Since 2022 my life has been stagnant, graduate from colleage but didn't find a job at all which is shameful for me. Everytime i think about my current life condition makes me want to off myself. But right now, i still want to at least tried something that probably would gave me hope