Discussion Suicidal thoughts enjoyable?

[Hateyouprolife]

From what I have read on internet people "suffer" from suicidsl thoughts. Even on latest discussion here about describing suicidal thoughts, many would describe them as distressing or negative. For example on samaritarians website (just checked for pro-life propaganda) said that suicidal thoughts can be scary, confusing or distressing.

So why would anyone feel concerned about their suicidal thoughts? Is distress from reasons that lead to suicide?

I can even say that I enjoy thinking about my suicide and preparing for it, it makes me feel happy. Can anyone relate to this?

 

[rationaltake]

Yes. The thought of being dead makes me smile. Somebody said to me that they gave their cut throat razor to somebody for safe keeping as they were scared of attempting suicide with it. So some don't want to attempt but fear they will. While some want to succeed and fear failure. I think in a way the latter is better. If you have to be suicidal in the first place. Just my take on it.

 

[reachingtheend]

Yep, I'm always calm and happy while thinking about my ctb.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think in my case, maybe enjoy isn't the right word as I cannot enjoy anything, but suicidal thoughts can be comforting and it can be the only thing that gives me some relief from this horrible existence, knowing I can end it and I can finally be at peace. In the case of my life wanting suicide is perfectly rational, it is the only thing that makes sense. I just wish it was easier to exit this world, that is all.

 

[Lone_Gray_Wolf]

Suicidal thoughts, at least for me, were not always comfortable. When this all started I was afraid that it all would end up the way it did, I feared myself and feared suicide. At the end, got used to them and when you have them for many years, they stop being scary.

Best of luck.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

Average introspection fan vs average suicidal ideation enjoyer.

 

[Hateyouprolife]

When this all started I was afraid that it all would end up the way it did, I feared myself and feared suicide.

Could you specify what exactly? What so scary about suicide exept SI? I have never feared it so I just cannot understand.

 

[reachingtheend]

Exit is really quite hard. I too find my suicide rational, but it would be impossible to convince non SS member that it is.

Could you specify what exactly? What so scary about suicide exept SI? I have never feared it so I just cannot understand.

Imo no one should have to convince anyone. That's my choice of what I want to do with my life. And if I want to end it, everyone should just accept it.

 

[Hateyouprolife]

Imo no one should have to convince anyone. That's my choice of what I want to do with my life. And if I want to end it, everyone should just accept it.

Right but as short as I live, I want to leave note so that my ctb doesnt look like being out of my mind and irrational, but as choice.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Not comforting in a joyous way, but more comforting on a peaceful, yet deeply sad way. As much as I have longed to die for decades, a part of me has tremendously enjoyed learning and experiencing things throughout my life. Plus there are people I adore whom I want to guide and nurture into better people. Alas, I have to let go at some time and trust they have or will gain the wisdom to make a decision that is best for them. So, yeah, comforting, but in a sad, tired sort of way.

 

[hyacinths]

it's peaceful, in a way. to know that there's a way out. it keeps me sane when the days are extremely rough. the thoughts of ending my life are way more comforting than the thoughts of continuing it. the only thing that scares me is failure.

 

[Seafoam]

I feel most in control when thinking about/planning my suicide.

 

[PeacefulTonic]

I hate my suicidal thoughts because I once had a great life not too long ago. And now suicide may be the only way to actually have peace. I didn't want things to be this way but I fucked up badly

 

[thereisthemist]

only suicide makes me human I think

 

[SentencedToLife]

I fear what my theoretical suicide would do to certain people. But personally, thinking about suicide gets me through the day.

 

[VivantMort]

"The thought of suicide is a great consolation: by means of it one gets through many a dark night." ~ F. Nietzsche

Here's a "note to self" I wrote many months ago which I am referring to quite often these days as the date of my impending death gets closer and the reality of euthanizing myself becomes more and more real:

"Contemplating the reality of my impending death is my only consolation, providing me immense comfort, joy, despair, peace, happiness, sadness, satisfaction, serenity, tranquility and contentment..."

Peace be with you all.

 

[Superdeterminist]

From what I have read on internet people "suffer" from suicidsl thoughts. Even on latest discussion here about describing suicidal thoughts, many would describe them as distressing or negative. For example on samaritarians website (just checked for pro-life propaganda) said that suicidal thoughts can be scary, confusing or distressing.

So why would anyone feel concerned about their suicidal thoughts? Is distress from reasons that lead to suicide?

I can even say that I enjoy thinking about my suicide and preparing for it, it makes me feel happy. Can anyone relate to this?

Definitely, and that's a good point. The painful part is continuing to exist, the exit is what is looked forward to. Also, I love your username haha

 

[September5th]

Paradoxally, suicide thoughts are the only thing keeping me going. Death is beautiful. Nonexistence is beautiful. The idea of escaping this pain is comforting.

 

[befree]

Maybe not enjoyable, but the thought of having everything you need for it gives you a good feeling.