stop talking?

[flypno]

Hello everyone,

please excuse possible mistakes, I let google translate everything because my language skills will not be sufficient to express myself clearly.

Like many others here, I suffer from depression. They were diagnosed in 2018, but they probably started when I was a child. So far no one has been able to tell me exactly.
It was often said that in such a situation you have to talk about it to feel better. After a stay in the clinic in 2020, I came to a therapist through relationships who was supposed to help me find out how to proceed. Initially I had the impression that it worked and went to her with great expectations. Unfortunately, after some time I had to realize that she had no idea what I was talking about and she apparently did not recognize the clinical picture from other patients. Nevertheless, I continued to go to the appointments because I was just glad to have come to therapy.

Because I realized that she would not help me, I sought talks with other people in my immediate vicinity. (wife, friends, parents, etc.) None of them seemed able to understand me. I was ready to talk. I still want to talk too. But with a lack of understanding, indifference also seems to build up over time. So why try to talk about your own problems and burden other people with your own problems? Is there really any point in talking to other people?

Have you ever found that talking about your depression, feelings, fears, and thoughts has helped you?
I'm very interested, I'm losing faith in this kind of healing more and more.

Thanks.

 

[No longer suicidal😁]

What might work for some may not work for others. Talking about my problems with others doesn't help at all. In addition, people don't like to listen to others problems as this brings their mood down.

 

[looseye]

Talking about your problems can be very helpful indeed. Although it can also lead to frustration when you're opening up to people who cannot sufficiently relate to you. I have found simple text message conversations with people from this forum far more therapeutic than talking to "real" people in my social environment. The latter has more often than not had a negative impact on our relationships, actually. It is important to find people who are able to understand what you're going through, then talking about your problems can lead to very positive outcomes. Otherwise it's just a waste of time, really...

 

[Mlee75]

Hello everyone,

please excuse possible mistakes, I let google translate everything because my language skills will not be sufficient to express myself clearly.

Like many others here, I suffer from depression. They were diagnosed in 2018, but they probably started when I was a child. So far no one has been able to tell me exactly.
It was often said that in such a situation you have to talk about it to feel better. After a stay in the clinic in 2020, I came to a therapist through relationships who was supposed to help me find out how to proceed. Initially I had the impression that it worked and went to her with great expectations. Unfortunately, after some time I had to realize that she had no idea what I was talking about and she apparently did not recognize the clinical picture from other patients. Nevertheless, I continued to go to the appointments because I was just glad to have come to therapy.

Because I realized that she would not help me, I sought talks with other people in my immediate vicinity. (wife, friends, parents, etc.) None of them seemed able to understand me. I was ready to talk. I still want to talk too. But with a lack of understanding, indifference also seems to build up over time. So why try to talk about your own problems and burden other people with your own problems? Is there really any point in talking to other people?

Have you ever found that talking about your depression, feelings, fears, and thoughts has helped you?
I'm very interested, I'm losing faith in this kind of healing more and more.

Thanks.

I went through more than a handful of therapists before I found a thoughtful and competent one. It was expensive and it took quite a few years. It takes a lot of motivation to keep trying

 

[flypno]

I went through more than a handful of therapists before I found a thoughtful and competent one. It was expensive and it took quite a few years. It takes a lot of motivation to keep trying

Fortunately, the german healthcare system is structured in such a way that you don't have to worry about the costs. The problem is the lack of therapists and their waiting lists. Waiting times of up to 1.5 years is normal, if they still accept you at all. So I take what I can get, even if it means dealing with incompetent therapists.

 

[Mlee75]

Fortunately, the german healthcare system is structured in such a way that you don't have to worry about the costs. The problem is the lack of therapists and their waiting lists. Waiting times of up to 1.5 years is normal, if they still accept you at all. So I take what I can get, even if it means dealing with incompetent therapists.

Fortunately, the german healthcare system is structured in such a way that you don't have to worry about the costs. The problem is the lack of therapists and their waiting lists. Waiting times of up to 1.5 years is normal, if they still accept you at all. So I take what I can get, even if it means dealing with incompetent therapists.

I have run out of money for paid therapists and I'm now about to join a waiting list. So, we will be doing this together. I figure, it can't hurt

 

[flypno]

I have run out of money for paid therapists and I'm now about to join a waiting list. So, we will be doing this together. I figure, it can't hurt

This situation is certainly a problem for many people. Being not able to afford a therapist while struggling with depression already

Talking about your problems can be very helpful indeed. Although it can also lead to frustration when you're opening up to people who cannot sufficiently relate to you. I have found simple text message conversations with people from this forum far more therapeutic than talking to "real" people in my social environment. The latter has more often than not had a negative impact on our relationships, actually. It is important to find people who are able to understand what you're going through, then talking about your problems can lead to very positive outcomes. Otherwise it's just a waste of time, really...

correct. the most understanding people I have ever met were in a psychiatric hospital. However, the few or only people in the direct environment have no idea what we are talking about. Or they don't want to understand

 

[Mlee75]

This situation is certainly a problem for many people. Being not able to afford a therapist while struggling with depression already

It's just an awful problem. First World countries are just starting to realize that and it will take forever to fix. The poor people in third world countries are being locked in cages and tied to trees for therapy. It's a worldwide crisis

 

[FuneralCry]

Maybe this thread belongs in the recovery section, rather than the suicide one. But anyway to me any kind of conversation is incredibly useless, words cannot remove problems or take away any suffering. If someone tries to tell others about what they are going through then that could just lead to the other person invalidating their suffering and dismissing their feelings, so of course talking isn't beneficial. And I don't really recommend being open about wanting to die, doing such a thing in a society where suicide is so stigmatised could only ever make things worse. It's sad that people cannot have open conversations about wishes and plans to die without the fear of others interfering but it's just the way that things are.