• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block. If you're located in the UK, we recommend using a VPN to maintain access.

Rustysoupcan

Rustysoupcan

I'm sensitive
May 2, 2020
242
Does anyone else have the constant urge to commit suicide, even when life is going well? Like everything in my life is going fine, my depression symptoms are basically gone, yet I still have the urge to hang myself or to OD. I don't know why either. But I kind of hate it. Like I cant actually enjoy life because I'm too obsessed with thinking about how I could end it. The main reason I havent done it is because I have an amazing boyfriend who I don't want to hurt. Sometimes I wish I had never met him so I wouldnt have to feel guilty about dying.
 
  • Like
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: BeautifulMosaics, Beached_whale, suicidesheep31 and 1 other person
HelloHell

HelloHell

Arcanist
Dec 26, 2019
443
My depression is never gone, but I get what you mean. I still want to ctb even on good days
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: BeautifulMosaics, WrongPlaceWrongTime and Rustysoupcan
Pluto

Pluto

Cat Extremist
Dec 27, 2020
5,269
Maybe life is 'normal' rather than 'fine'. Average people are pretty miserable, they just dare not admit it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: WrongPlaceWrongTime and Seiko
Seiko

Seiko

"Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby."
Jul 9, 2021
167
You've described me. There's nothing inherently wrong with my life. I guess some people are just naturally suicidal? In a way, it's a good thing. If you want to CTB while relatively content—or even "happy"—you know it's a grounded thought and it's not just hormones or angst speaking.

Life is completely voluntary. Almost unnecessary. The "gift" of life is a matter of perception.
 
  • Like
Reactions: WrongPlaceWrongTime and Rustysoupcan
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,825
I think I will be suicidal no matter what. The thoughts have been a part of me for a long time and they are unlikely to ever leave.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: BeautifulMosaics

Similar threads

Someplace_nice
Replies
1
Views
205
Recovery
gottacheckout
gottacheckout
SomewhereAlongThe
Replies
61
Views
3K
Suicide Discussion
locked*n*loaded
locked*n*loaded
SophieMakesGames
Venting I want to die
Replies
13
Views
872
Suicide Discussion
bankai
bankai