Venting Still here apparently.

[deadtrace]

End up doing one of these every few months so I'll just keep it short. Been over a year since I ended up here, and been as long as I can remember since I started having SI. Yes im still here. Have things gotten better? No. Just worse. I've tried but I can't push through anything anymore. I'm just throwing myself at a fucking wall over and over. Every day is just sitting here doing nothing, wasting time and making my life even more unfixable than it already is. But can I just ctb? Nope. Too fucking weak and useless. But if I can't get better or even have a life what am I meant to do if I can't ctb.

 

[iloveyouihateyou]

i'm sorry to hear that things haven't improved, i hear you and i feel the same way. i like to think if we don't ctb we can still get better but i don't even know man.. i too have been wasting all my time, living the same day over and over and i fear that things are only getting worse from here. i hope within the "wasted time" you can atleast do something you enjoy even if it isn't "productive" or whatever people may think.. that's what i'm trying to do atleast

 

[TimetoGo!]

End up doing one of these every few months so I'll just keep it short. Been over a year since I ended up here, and been as long as I can remember since I started having SI. Yes im still here. Have things gotten better? No. Just worse. I've tried but I can't push through anything anymore. I'm just throwing myself at a fucking wall over and over. Every day is just sitting here doing nothing, wasting time and making my life even more unfixable than it already is. But can I just ctb? Nope. Too fucking weak and useless. But if I can't get better or even have a life what am I meant to do if I can't ctb.

You have literally just typed out how I feel……exactly the same.

Have you attempted CTB or not at that point yet?