Still having issues finding an AE

[Curlyfried]

My days are numbered. As soon as my SN arrives in the mail I'm doing it.

I would like to be heavily sedated by opoids like hydro, oxy, tramdol or heroin before I drink my stay dose.

Does ANYONE know of an AE that will hold down about 10 grams of SN as well as pills such as oxy or hydro? Will metoclopramide work? What about a combination of cannabis, metoclopramide and pepto-bismol? Surely all three of those will keep whatever is in my stomach?

If not what AE should I look for? For context I do have access to the dark web so legality shouldnt be an issue.

Someone please help me with this, I need to die and get this over with so bad but I don't want to do it without getting fucked up first. I do NOT want to risk damaging my liver and throwing everything up

 

[autumnal]

My days are numbered. As soon as my SN arrives in the mail I'm doing it.

I think this is part of the reason for your problems and massive gaps in knowledge as explored in other threads. You should not be rushing or putting a time limit on yourself. Rather, you should only be taking that final step once you properly understand all of the instructions and issues involved.

I can say with a large degree of confidence that right now you are not at that point, and any attempt you made based on your current competency would be far from peaceful and quite possibly unsuccessful.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I agree with @autumnal. I understand how much you want to do this, but I fear that you might get things wrong and create more issues. It sounds like this is a fear of yours too.

Please, please, please read through Stan's guide a couple of times so you're familiar with the values and necessary items and why they're important. It's essential. Really and truly. Sending you positive vibes through this difficult time.

 

[autumnal]

I agree with @autumnal. I understand how much you want to do this, but I fear that you might get things wrong and create more issues. It sounds like this is a fear of yours too.

Please, please, please read through Stan's guide a couple of times so you're familiar with the values and necessary items and why they're important. It's essential. Really and truly. Sending you positive vibes through this difficult time.

And the PPH. Especially the PPH.

 

[Curlyfried]

I think this is part of the reason for your problems and massive gaps in knowledge as explored in other threads. You should not be rushing or putting a time limit on yourself. Rather, you should only be taking that final step once you properly understand all of the instructions and issues involved.

I can say with a large degree of confidence that right now you are not at that point, and any attempt you made based on your current competency would be far from peaceful and quite possibly unsuccessful.

All you're saying is "read the guide over". Can you please tell me specifically what parts I'm getting wrong instead of just identifying my lack of knowledge? I would appreciate constructive criticism so I can do this the right way but so far no one has actually specifically told me anything about what I'm missing. If you could do that I would be very appreciative

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

All you're saying is "read the guide over". Can you please tell me specifically what parts I'm getting wrong instead of just identifying my lack of knowledge? I would appreciate constructive criticism so I can do this the right way but so far no one has actually specifically told me anything about what I'm missing. If you could do that I would be very appreciative

I think that's intentional. If the issues were just listed in this thread, you would be less likely to actually read the guide yourself. That wouldn't allow you the comprehensive understanding of the method that you should have.

I will say that your intended mass of SN is insufficient. Taking such a small amount can cause you severe harm and can make the experience long and painful. Furthermore, AEs that aren't dopamine blockers are ineffective.

 

[Eachdaymakesmedumber]

I've also been reconsidering SN and I'm also thinking about combining it with 80 mg Oxy.

Do you know if this increases the risk of vomitting or interferes with the death process?

 

[Aap]

What you are missing is obsessing over the wrong items. Antiemetics are not, repeat are not required. Another example would be the correct dosage of SN, as has been pointed out to you in several posts on multiple threads. Another detail would be fasting.

 

[Eachdaymakesmedumber]

What you are missing is obsessing over the wrong items. Antiemetics are not, repeat are not required. Another example would be the correct dosage of SN, as has been pointed out to you in several posts on multiple threads. Another detail would be fasting.

AE could be the crucial point between life and death. Unless you wanna eat your own vomit in your last seconds.

 

[Aap]

Multiple individuals have succeeded after vomitting, with and without AE. No antiemetic or combination Theron will or can guarantee no vomiting. In fact, many or most of the individuals who take SN vomit. You aren't understanding the physiology of what is happening. Under the scenario you describe, you would be unconscious. If you are conscious, you will vomit normally, as many posters have reported doing.

To summarize. An AE does NOT guarantee to vomiting. Multiple individuals have ctb even though they vomited. what is far more important is actually using the correct amount of SN.

 

[Eachdaymakesmedumber]

Multiple individuals have succeeded after vomitting, with and without AE. No antiemetic or combination Theron will or can guarantee no vomiting. In fact, many or most of the individuals who take SN vomit. You aren't understanding the physiology of what is happening. Under the scenario you describe, you would be unconscious. If you are conscious, you will vomit normally, as many posters have reported doing.

To summarize. An AE does NOT guarantee to vomiting. Multiple individuals have ctb even though they vomited. what is far more important is actually using the correct amount of SN.

Sure, but it's foolish not to add the AE for extra security. I feel like we're derailing the thread here and I already got a warning about it so let's stop discussing that, sir.

Look at this suicide case where if he had taken AE he would have succeded in the CTB.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/i-took-sn-and-survived.42380/page-3

 

[autumnal]

All you're saying is "read the guide over". Can you please tell me specifically what parts I'm getting wrong instead of just identifying my lack of knowledge? I would appreciate constructive criticism so I can do this the right way but so far no one has actually specifically told me anything about what I'm missing. If you could do that I would be very appreciative

I think that's intentional. If the issues were just listed in this thread, you would be less likely to actually read the guide yourself. That wouldn't allow you the comprehensive understanding of the method that you should have.
[...]

 

[Living sucks]

Sure, but it's foolish not to add the AE for extra security. I feel like we're derailing the thread here and I already got a warning about it so let's stop discussing that, sir.

Look at this suicide case where if he had taken AE he would have succeded in the CTB.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/i-took-sn-and-survived.42380/page-3

In the anecdote you attached, they OP said they were never a member prior but was then banned for having a alt account. So... can you believe what they said is true? I could present 10 cases with no AE that appear fatal but we don't know.
@Erase.myself took AE .. vomited a lot.
@Lion84 took 2 sips and confirmed passed .,

you can't predict .. can only speculate for each individual.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

In the anecdote you attached, they OP said they were never a member prior but was then banned for having a alt account. So... can you believe what they said is true?

In addition, that person reported an experience that was an extreme outlier in many ways. They also said just before being banned that they had Type I diabetes and multiple sclerosis, so if the account were true, either of those conditions could have caused the immediate vomiting, and MS could explain why the SN interacted differently with their body than the average person's. Including the ban, there were just too many red flags to consider that a reliable account to use as support for any claims.

 

[Curlyfried]

So is meto enough to hold down both 25 grams of SN+ morphine pills? What's the recommended dose of meto?
If you guys have this knowledge why not just post it in the thread vs saying "go read the guide"? Getting sick of having to go back and forth between the guide and this thread and not all of us can afford the PPH

 

[Living sucks]

Ok Here's the answer clear and concise with 0 animosity or sarcasm.. straight up and to the point

WE DONT KNOW BECAUSE EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT AND YOURE TAKING A COMBINATION THAT HAS NO RESEARCH BASED ANSWERS. YOU HAVE TO DECIDE FOR YOURSELF HOW WHAT WHEN HOW MUCH AND WHERE.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

So is meto enough to hold down both 25 grams of SN+ morphine pills? What's the recommended dose of meto?
If you guys have this knowledge why not just post it in the thread vs saying "go read the guide"? Getting sick of having to go back and forth between the guide and this thread and not all of us can afford the PPH

Not trying to make things difficult. We just believe in the importance in knowing the method well. Just reading through a few threads posted today, one can encounter misinformation about the method. Familiarity with the source is really the best bet. I think the forum makes it pretty easy to access.

You can access the PPeH from the Resources Compilation as well too.

Please know that we really are trying to be helpful.

 

[Curlyfried]

Ok Here's the answer clear and concise with 0 animosity or sarcasm.. straight up and to the point

WE DONT KNOW BECAUSE EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT AND YOURE TAKING A COMBINATION THAT HAS NO RESEARCH BASED ANSWERS. YOU HAVE TO DECIDE FOR YOURSELF HOW WHAT WHEN HOW MUCH AND WHERE.

According to PPH apparently 15gm is considered a lethal dose... But according to stan's guide 25gm is recommended for a large adult. I weigh about 190 so I'm going to assume this my lethal dose. I think I will simply snort morphine until I'm comfortable enough and then lay down and die. I guess I will also accompany 30mg of meto just to be on the safe side as well.

Also yes I really appreciate you guys being patient with me, it's hard to have patience and focus when all I can think about is fucking dying. I hope my method works, if not I think I'm just going to drown myself

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

If you guys have this knowledge why not just post it in the thread vs saying "go read the guide"?

Because you're responsible for your own suicide, not others.

Getting sick of having to go back and forth between the guide and this thread

Who owns your feelings? You. Not everyone else.


Look, there was a member who used to post tons of questions. When folks asked what was up, he didn't get defensive and blast everyone with his emotions to get them to submit and comply with his wants. He calmly explained that he had autism and it was his learning style to ask a lot of questions to help him understand. After that, folks were happy to do some extra hand-holding.

I noticed that you were advised in multiple threads that you weren't going to use enough SN. It finally got through in this one. If you'd read the guide, you would have already known the amount. If you read the guide, you will know how much meto you need. In most assisted OD methods, the amount of meto is the same. For morphine, no one knows, it's not a "method."

If you have comprehension issues and need help, speak up about it, explain it. But not some bullshit story if that's the way to get your wishes and convenience catered to. If there an actual issue, say so. Otherwise, whether you intend to or not, you're coming across like a brat or, frankly, an addict who acts incapable, wants everything done for them, and brandishes emotions when everything is not done for them, often followed with escalation, such as threats of self-harm or leaving in retaliation. If neither of those is even close to who you really are and you genuinely need help, have the courage to be a little vulnerable and say what's really up. People will respond to that with kindness and assistance. People do not respond well to demands, tantrums, being manipulated, or being ignored and then asked for the same advice they repeatedly gave when warning you were taking too little SN.

 

[Curlyfried]

Because you're responsible for your own suicide, not others.




Who owns your feelings? You. Not everyone else.


Look, there was a member who used to post tons of questions. When folks asked what was up, he didn't get defensive and blast everyone with his emotions to get them to submit and comply with his wants. He calmly explained that he had autism and it was his learning style to ask a lot of questions to help him understand. After that, folks were happy to do some extra hand-holding.

I noticed that you were advised in multiple threads that you weren't going to use enough SN. It finally got through in this one. If you'd read the guide, you would have already known the amount. If you read the guide, you will know how much meto you need. In most assisted OD methods, the amount of meto is the same. For morphine, no one knows, it's not a "method."

If you have comprehension issues and need help, speak up about it, explain it. But not some bullshit story if that's the way to get your wishes and convenience catered to. If there an actual issue, say so. Otherwise, whether you intend to or not, you're coming across like a brat or, frankly, an addict who acts incapable, wants everything done for them, and brandishes emotions when everything is not done for them, often followed with escalation, such as threats of self-harm or leaving in retaliation. If neither of those is even close to who you really are and you genuinely need help, have the courage to be a little vulnerable and say what's really up. People will respond to that with kindness and assistance. People do not respond well to demands, tantrums, being manipulated, or being ignored and then asked for the same advice they repeatedly gave when warning you were taking too little SN.

You're right. I should have been patient and read both Stan's Guide and the PPH before commenting. Which I have now. I apologize for my past behavior. I too am on the autism spectrum and having to wait each day after day for my death makes it hard to stay calm. A lot of times I panic because I don't know whether or not my method will successfully end my life. I felt almost a desperate need to obtain this information as quickly as possible, so that is why I had an attitude before. I hope you can understand where my prior frustration and attitude came from. I will try to post and reply during the day when i'm sober.

Here's what I've gathered so far from PPH and Stan's Guide:

So after reading both texts I have a mostly thorough idea of what i'm going to do. My SN is still on it's way here but I will be using 25 grams, perhaps even 30 just to make absolutely sure I will die. Finding a prescription anti-emetic is going to be the hardest part. I would preferably like to use 30mg of metoclopramide but that requires a prescription. Would going to the doctor and complaining of migraine and nausea do the trick? The deep web market I use for my opoid pills does not seem to have any anti- emetics. If for some reason I can't get a prescription anti-emetic are there OTC substitutes that would work?

I will also have no problem obtaining OTC painkillers and ant acids. Not sure about beta blockers but my dad has blood thinners for his afib heart condition, hopefully those will do the same thing. I will check what kind of blood thinners they are and update this thread.

A few more random questions that are not mentioned in either guide:
When stirring the SN into water, is it easier to use hot water so it dissolves faster? Or does the temperature of the water not matter?

Both guides mentioned very little about sedatives. My plan is so either snort heroin or take morphine pills before ingesting the SN mixture and ant acids. Hopefully this will mitigate any nausea. I'm just not really sure if it matters whether or not I take them before or aftert.

Thank you guys so much for your help with this. I will make a fresh thread when all of my supplies are gathered. I will also be live streaming when I ctb as well. Have a great evening

 

[Living sucks]

I find this source below most helpful for the questions you have.

room temp water
Beta blockers and blood thinners are not the same..

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-resource-page.32633/

 

[Aap]

Perhaps a tip going forward would be not to suggest a random substitution. For example, don't suggest substituting "blood thinners" for the specific, optional, propranolol simply because they both do something to blood.

the only thing you need is SN in the correct dosage. I've posted multiple times about opiates, and I'm not going to rehash it only to say that "sniffing heroin" for the first time and hoping for the best is problematic. Nausea aside, timing is going to be difficult, as you don't know how much you would be consuming. This can result in much faster potential unconsciousness than you realize. Should it be done 5 minutes before SN, 10? 20?

You aren't going to be given a satisfactory answer. If you aren't experienced with opiates and are hellbent on using them, I would once again urge you to take a small or moderate dose of a known opiate by mouth. I know what you have expressed desire to do, and it would be disingenuous to suggest it will be easy or certain.

being inexperienced, there are a couple of scenarios that will likely play out, and only one matches what you are looking for. I'm not going to walk someone into the joys of opiate abuse, and I'd encourage you to listen to the advice given to you here repeatedly.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

If for some reason I can't get a prescription anti-emetic are there OTC substitutes that would work?

This is covered in Stan's guide.

I also recommend you read the SN Resources Page that @Living sucks linked. That will answer your question about water temperature as well as many other questions you may come up with later.

Yes, I understand where you were coming from. I appreciate that you heard the criticisms and didn't get defensive. Thank you for explaining. It will indeed be good if you post when you're sober, and if you don't take your frustrations out on others. However, I do get the frustration as you explained it and it made sense. I think it took courage to accept criticism, to explain what was happening, and to apologize. Hopefully things will be better going forward and this can be left in the past as just a difficult moment. We all have them.

 

[autumnal]

Please be aware that your attitude is starting to become unbearably annoying. I am in full agreement with the sentiments expressed above about you seeming brattish.

The PPH and Stan's Guide are both freely and easily available.

You are getting annoyed needing to go back and forth between this thread and the guide? The point is, if you had (properly) read the PPH and Stan's Guide, you likely wouldn't need to be posting most of these threads where you expect people to spoon-feed you information that is already covered comprehensively in the guides.

People are reluctant to spoon-feed you for some or all of the following reasons:

1. It is annoying and time-wasting to have to retype or paste information that is already readily available elsewhere. This is especially the case when a lot of members here have physical or mental limitations on their amounts of energy available.
2. Retyping or pasting that information makes that member responsible for any mistakes or typos, which is both risky for you and unfair on them. Directing you to the trusted, original source helps prevent these kind of errors.
3. Reading and understanding the two key resources is essential to the SN method. Anything less than doing this is setting yourself up for significant gaps in your knowledge (which you have already demonstrated repeatedly in other threads, such as the 'taking some light snacks with SN' [!] one) and will lead to a painful or failed attempt.
4. Notwithstanding all the points above, your attitude comes across as unpleasant and people are even less likely to want to help you because of it.

You have mentioned previously posting while intoxicated on drugs or alcohol, and admitted that this makes your comprehension low and your behaviour unpleasant. Perhaps it would be best if you limited your forum use to those periods when you are unaffected by drugs or alcohol? If you wouldn't do something important like a job interview in that state, then don't do suicide planning in that state either.

 

[Curlyfried]

This is covered in Stan's guide.

I also recommend you read the SN Resources Page that @Living sucks linked. That will answer your question about water temperature as well as many other questions you may come up with later.

Yes, I understand where you were coming from. I appreciate that you heard the criticisms and didn't get defensive. Thank you for explaining. It will indeed be good if you post when you're sober, and if you don't take your frustrations out on others. However, I do get the frustration as you explained it and it made sense. I think it took courage to accept criticism, to explain what was happening, and to apologize. Hopefully things will be better going forward and this can be left in the past as just a difficult moment. We all have them.

Thank you for accepting my apology man. People having empathy for one another is one of the greatest feelings in the world. A lot of times I find myself lurking this forum when I'm in an emotional state that I really shouldn't be and I think that's how a lot of people end up having complete breakdowns on here. Which is still understandable.

Anyways, moving on to the topic at hand,
I read through the entirety of the SN section of the PPH as well as Stan's Guide. I will be going with the Stat Dose method and have written out my plans exactly in a separate document. I'm fairly confident that when I obtain all of the ingredients, measure them out and such that my method will have nearly a 100% success rate. Which is why I am actually not going to post the plans on the public forum. I am a strong christian and I do not want someone else to copy my method, especially considering i've thought out pretty much every aspect of it to make sure it is successful. If someone were to read my plans and ctb I would feel partially responsible for their death, and that is a sin in my eyes.

My SN has still not arrived in the mail yet. But if someone would like to PM me and look over my plans for me that would be greatly appreciated. Having a suicidal mindset truly does fog the cognitive part of my brain and my plan definitively requires some proofreading. My biggest issue right now is that I cannot find a non-prescription anti-emetic, not even on the dark web. Since I will be ingesting opiods I need to make extra sure that I do not vomit at all.

Anyway, I hope you're all doing well, god bless. Hopefully whoever PM's me can help me find an OTC alternative to metoclopramide.

Thank you all and have a blessed day. Apologise again to those who I may have annoyed with my previous posts.