starting to feel like i might not be able to keep myself safe anymore

[immrw]

it's been a really rough few months. lots of bad luck i guess with all the stuff popping up. starting to feel sorta suicidal again, but more like i don't want to die, i just don't want to be in this situation.

if this was a few years ago, i would've gone to the hospital and been inpatient, but things have changed and i'm not sure that's an option for me. it feels like too big a thing to turn to my friends for. they're not equipped to deal with SI.

 

[Mr.Tristesse]

If you want to talk in more detail about it, you are welcome to message me.

 

[nonie]

I know how you feel. I too wish I could snap my finger and essentially hit shuffle in the game of life and see where I end up, as long as it isn't here. Something that's helping me drudge through is, in a funny way, being selfish. I've just been doing what I want, regardless of how it makes people feel. I'm of course not hurting anyone in the process, but I am saying no/yes to things without thinking of other's perception of me, being blunt and open about how I feel about certain things, and all around just trying to do what I can to enjoy where I'm at more. It's kind of working for me!

Joining this site was in and of itself, a version of me being selfish and doing what I want and I am happy with that decision :)

 

[puella]

I'm here for you. I can't promise I will be properly equipped to help you with SI. But you don't have to worry about it being too big for me either. I totally understand how you feel.

 

[MrThe]

it's been a really rough few months. lots of bad luck i guess with all the stuff popping up. starting to feel sorta suicidal again, but more like i don't want to die, i just don't want to be in this situation.

if this was a few years ago, i would've gone to the hospital and been inpatient, but things have changed and i'm not sure that's an option for me. it feels like too big a thing to turn to my friends for. they're not equipped to deal with SI.

Hey, when you're feeling overwhelmed, like life is trying to bring you down, I recommend you listen to Waltz of the Flowers by Tchaikovsky (in Youtube by Rousseau), its a really beautiful music, it can really give you a new prespective in life.
Did you know Tchaikovsky was a gardener in his spare time? He dedicated this music for his favorite bush (You can see it in the comment section of the video).
Anyways, tell me if you liked, I have at least two (and a lot more) other musics I would love to share!