Help Some questions regarding death

[lixt]

For some reason, living with depression and anxiety is so addictive. I love how it changed me and how the symptoms affected me. Maybe I like the attention it gives me, a dark one, I don't know. Yet it doesn't matter as I'm hopefully catching the bus in the following weeks, making the sky beautiful one last time by getting a train ride or flying off a building.

I find comfort in my illnesses and how they make me feel, choosing the death drive as my daily motivation. But is it normal to like depression and anxiety? Is it usual to love panic attacks? Is it common to like the ruminating thoughts of regretting the past?

Nevertheless, I should get back to the topic. I came here to ask about the probability of death in jumping from the 9th floor or getting hit by a train. How painful is it? Do most trains have any defense in preventing suicidal people? I know trains had a net to catch people from getting hit by them. And if they do, how can I identify them or even bypass those security measures? If I decide to jump from a building, how likely am I to die from jumping from the 6th to the 10th floor as a young male with 70 kg?

 

[sorlox]

Train is a dishonored method here (for a reason), and for jumping - it depends on drop height and landing position. Landing on a head or neck - higher chance

 

[rozeske]

That's a first one for me. Never heard of anyone loving them or finding comfort in them and considering how they make me feel, I honestly find it kind of odd, but I guess it's always better to feel that way than complete misery :)

For the jumping, though we can't be fully certain, according to this document, it needs to be from atleast 150ft or 46m or roughly 10-15 stories in a building on to a hard surface with nothing in between to break your fall.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

Please forget about the jumping in front of trains/trucks/cars, etc... All that does is traumatize the drivers of those vehicles.

As @sorlox mentioned, it's a dishonored method here.

 

[Linda]

Throwing yourself in front of a train involves many variables, and so it is harder to ensure that you will die rather than just being badly injured. If you jump, a good guideline is that jumping from 100 feet or more and landing on a hard surface (such as concrete) is nearly always fatal. Just make sure there is nobody below you when you jump. Landing on top of someone could kill or seriously injure them - and might break your fall too.

 

[lixt]

Yes, you are right. My issue is that there are not very high places in the city I live and trains are usual effective and that is the only method, with high chances, I have available. I'm also searching less painful methods with high efficacy available for me.