Venting Some Parents are selfish

[eleanorhere]

Why do they have kids if they don't care about them if they know they are going to suffer and not do much to help them or have the things to provide them with a food life while bringing them up. It's wrong. Or they should be given to people who can take care of them properly after they are born so at least they don't grow up traumatised

 

[facel]

So true. My ex-wife is like that, should never have had kids, she just bullied them and couldn't cope with not being able to think of only herself. She only had them to try to trap me in the marriage (she told me that) - eventually I had to end it due to her abuse and I brought them up on my own. Her father was the same.

 

[Smart No More]

Yeah, It's crazy how selfish people can be. To put it mildly!

 

[existtosuffer]

I think people should have to go through screening in order to have kids.

If you choose to work with them, you need a background check, so the same should apply if you want to create them.

 

[stellabelle]

Why do they have kids if they don't care about them if they know they are going to suffer and not do much to help them or have the things to provide them with a food life while bringing them up. It's wrong. Or they should be given to people who can take care of them properly after they are born so at least they don't grow up traumatised

My mother intentionally abused my siblings and my father. She continued the abuse well up to her death last year. I have had a ton of problems because of it, a lot of stalkers and liars and little shit disturbers.

as someone who has learned to walk away I feel very helpless, that I cannot move forward in life because I've been repeatedly prevented from doing so and subjected to more and more abuse.
She used me as her human puppet, but never really allowed me to get away from her and continued encouraging others to abuse.

it's absolutely cruel.
I honestly blame the system for not removing me and bare minimum standards for CPS being a clean house and food in the cupboard. So all of the physical and verbal abuse was covered up and repeatedly occurred.

she would do it by having others continue it. And I can see it coming but I cannot stop it and that's what's absolutely sick. Trying to enforce boundaries, tell someone no, and to stop, and to leave you alone, and they just continue to pester you and fuck with you to the point you walk away and then whabam, more lies, stolen property, little stupid "games" which are not games.

Repeatedly held hostage, repeatedly triggered, repeatedly screwed with and people think it's "funny" or it's "okay" when it's not. And that's the saddest thing.

She always said children are a mistake, you're just bad, nobody loves you, etc etc etc.

Callous people like this should not be allowed near children.

 

[Smart No More]

Ha!... Great avatar @existtosuffer .

 

[The Divine Comedy]

I think people should have to go through screening in order to have kids.

If you choose to work with them, you need a background check, so the same should apply if you want to create them.

I have always thought this. It seems backwards that a human right is the right to inflict existance on another soul. There should certainly be some sort of basic check in place. Nothing dystopian, just a simple psychological consideration.

I see how this could quickly become dystopian and warped though. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

 

[LastLoveLetter]

I think people should have to go through screening in order to have kids.

If you choose to work with them, you need a background check, so the same should apply if you want to create them.

I absolutely agree with this wholeheartedly. I am an antinatalist personally - I disagree with bringing children into this world. But at a minimum, there should be a process in place to assess prospective parents.

Many children are brought into unspeakably harrowing circumstances: It is estimated that we have approximately 153 million orphans worldwide. Yet millions of children suffering in poverty, slave labour, trafficking, abusive households, passed around the social care system and living in countries impacted by conflict are left to rot in favour of biological offspring. Millions of children suffer, and are abandoned by the system that is supposed to shield them, after already being catastrophically failed by their families.

You need a licence to drive a car, you need qualifications for most forms of employment, you need a criminal record check to work with vulnerable demographics (including children), yet anyone is permitted to procreate for any reason or no reason at all.

You would think that such a colossal decision involving another human life would have some form of regulation, but no. Even proposing such a thing will be met with indignation, rage and accusations of promoting eugenics.

Putting the preservation of the right to procreate into perspective: It's okay for parents to procreate and subsequently abuse their children (any intervention that occurs is after damage has been done, if at all), but it's unacceptable to put preventative measures in place so that abusive, dangerous individuals do not have kids to dominate and destroy to begin with.

The world is a warped place.

 

[FuneralCry]

Of course I see every parent as selfish as they are only doing what is best for themselves rather than the child, by bringing someone into this existence. This life holds unlimited potential for suffering and I see it as better to never exist in the first place. We were all perfectly fine not existing until we were forced to live. It is extremely cruel when some parents neglect their children. Humans can be capable of so many awful things. Many people in this world are disadvantaged right from the start through no fault of their own due to the environment they are brought up in, life is certainly unfair.

 

[Rational man]

Why do they have kids if they don't care about them if they know they are going to suffer and not do much to help them or have the things to provide them with a food life while bringing them up. It's wrong. Or they should be given to people who can take care of them properly after they are born so at least they don't grow up traumatised

It's so common. My parents were dysfunctional and yet I came out sane. Remember, we didnt choose to arrive here. We got a bad card in the hand.

 

[existtosuffer]

Ha!... Great avatar @existtosuffer .

I'm convinced it's how I was brought into this world.

 

[Mukey]

If my life turned out great then I wouldn't be bitter about being born. I guess it all traced back to your parents having you but I guess they had the "gift of life" thing in mind.

 

[ClownMe]

Yeah, its awful, my parents have never cared about me, it makes no sense to me why people bring someone else into this world if they cant even be bothered to look after them.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Of course I see every parent as selfish as they are only doing what is best for themselves rather than the child, by bringing someone into this existence.

yup. My thoughts exactly. All parents are selfish by nature period.

 

[TheHatedOne]

Some parents??? That's too soft...